aging gracefully

There is always something about the first part of every year that makes us think of our age and aging in general. My granddaughter had a birthday this month, my husband has one coming up in January and each of us knows one is coming in the New Year. The other day I was shopping and walking down the bakery goods aisle where a young father was buying cake mix, canned frosting and large birthday candles. Apparently they were for his wife because his little daughter came running with large candles of wax declaring “36.” The father reacted by saying, “Oh, I don’t think she would like that.” Then looking at me he said, “Ma’am, what do you think?”

I smiled and said, “Make it 21 and she’ll love it.” He smiled and shook his head in a positive motion as I pushed my cart away was explaining it to his daughter. An older woman heard our conversation; I might add an older woman about my age but in a wheelchair. She commented, “Why do people worry so much about age?”

She appeared to be a pleasant woman who obviously was living with health trouble of some form and perhaps in all of her troubles had forgotten what it was like to be a young mother of thirty-six years. We each identify, quite naturally, with our present age.

When I got home I got a call from a friend who was deeply depressed and the bottom line of the cause seemed to be she didn’t like getting old. In her late seventies, she was tired of feeling it, having others refer to it and suffering the results of a body worn and not particularly well cared for. I told her I felt it certainly was better than the alternative available to us all but she was in no mood to hear it and wanted to wallow a bit longer.

The following day I was awakened by a call from out of state from a good, older friend of my husbands who told me old age was “Hell.” He pronounced he was “Ready to leave the stage,” and went on to exclaim, so was his wife, who is having knee problems. He is an old friend; a retired doctor given to exaggeration so I am not worried about him jumping or swallowing poison, but it was difficult to hear. Totally immersed in his own predicament, he was shut off to hearing about anyone else. Life had changed. He is used to being in charge, being wealthy and going where he wants to go. I haven’t been any of those things for a very long time so I have had longer to adjust to the limitations of life often brought on by aging.

On my SUV, the license plate holder declares, “SCREW THE GOLDEN YEARS.” It wasn’t my idea but I know it carries merit as I choose to trudge on not with regret and self-pity but with humor.  I have other elderly friends who vacation all over the world, swim with the dolphins, fly planes and generally enjoy life. For those of us boxed in by the limits of our bodies, it is more difficult but it is still just an obstacle. Obstacles can be overcome, adjusted to and sometimes, embraced.

Each of life’s cycles has its moments of glory, hell and puzzlement. If we wait long enough, answers usually come. Usefulness, love of family, creativity and pleasure will arrive. As in most stages of life, attitude is the most important of all attributes or curses, depending which direction we choose.

Infirmed, aging or confined, we are still us. We still have talents unexplored, some part of our family who loves us, small children who need our guidance and our memories and the all of the world to enjoy. Our beloved pets know not of age, nor care. Yesterday I noticed the first crimson camellia blooming on our huge bush. A camellia in December is unusual but just as beautiful. Winter frost is as dazzling and luminescent as a summer rainfall. Each season has its own pleasures. Do many of us live with pain? Certainly…so what? Has the world’s pleasures and its offerings changed?


I’m not sure why they say
We’re growing up or old?
Growth usually denotes
Spring shoots and buds of gold.

As children age was in quarters and halves
We always wanted to get big.
Each birthday was expectant
Like new hair on our thingamajig.

Someplace along the line
Birthdays brought less vigor
I think it was about the time
We began to lose our figure.

When was the last time
You heard someone say,
“Oh, I’m fifty-and-a-quarter.
And can’t wait for my birthday”?

Our perspective of age
Is constantly changing
With each passing year while,
Our bodies are re-arranging.

Alterations seem to come
In places once ignored.
The price we pay for aging
Is searching to be restored.

Perhaps we can’t be prime
Or choice cut again
But we “cook” with what we’ve got,
We’ve battles left to win.

Age is not the question
It’s the attitude that counts
Grab that body and bring it on
Ignore the fear that mounts.

Of course, we all know aging can suck
But it sure beats dropping dead.
Remember being a teen wasn’t always a treat
And giving birth wasn’t exactly Club Med.

As we creak, sag and parts flop around,
Our values surely change.
We, also, see our vision
And exterior is rearranged.

We often grieve for what is gone
And will never come again;
As we forget this wondrous world
And the magic locked within.

What magic, you might ask?
Your gifts, your loves, your hope,
They’re like money in the bank
Remember! Don’t act like a dope.

My skin turns cold when others groan
And complain life’s not so hot
This is the time when life grows dear
And we evaluate what we’ve got.

The last of the summer wine,
The final bloom on the rose,
These are the times to cherish
For all life must eventually close.

This is the time most brilliant
When all can glow with pride
Using it all up, leave none behind
Make it an enjoyable, productive ride.

Sue Falkner Wood

127 thoughts on “THE BIRTHDAY BOOK

  1. Hi sue
    Well I had two complements today …not!! On getting old which amused me
    I always think younger than than I look obviously. This lady who I thought looked muchly older than me..said ,as she looked at me after trying to get up ” this getting older etc….” I answered about the alternative
    THEN. The gynae said its easy to get in thru here as your cervix is very slack………gee thanks!!

    Good blog Sue and so true
    Got your post on last blog and yep I’m resting and not bleeding so much as last time(yet!)
    And Thankyou I will ask if I got a worry
    Wouldn’t have thought a polyp,would have grown like so in a year


      • Yea. ..and stop the bragging !
        Jen I didn’t know Tim might lose his job this month.its awful to have that hanging over DD her boss got asked to leave at college ,everyone is worried who’s next. They’ve both ,Tim and DD got new homes recently too.
        Ok going back to doing nowt
        Bleeding stopping and much less discomfort

      • Jennie, seems like the wise thing to do…Sue P.S. Guess I’ll now have to put you on the Ms. Tight Pants list with Lyn.

  2. I posted to soon yep I’m glad they found the fear was them finding nothing
    You get some good rest brains gone i forget what you said on post and I was gonna say something …brain dead I am
    But what I’m gonna enjoy tonite is listening to the wind out there and I’ve taken some cocodamol, and jst lose my eyes. Simple but calming for me tonite chrs

  3. I love it, Sue! My favorite part of the poem:

    Age is not the question
    It’s the attitude that counts
    Grab that body and bring it on
    Ignore the fear that mounts.

    I learned early on it truly is attitude that counts. You know your conversations and the rest of this week’s blog reminded me of my last rheumy appt. I’m sure he was considering what new med he wanted to try and asked me if I ever get depressed. Um, no. Not really. We all have down moments, but the only time of depression that came to mind when he asked was when my father died. I tried to explain to him I’m pretty much a glass half full kind of person. Attitude is everything. 🙂 I’ve found I really can’t stand to be around negative people for long, either. It really affects me. Isn’t it interesting how each of us approaches life differently? My DD is often a Negative Nelly. Drives me nuts. I can so clearly see all her talents and gifts and she, not so much. Ah, well.

    Chris, sounds like you are recovering. Glad it went well. I had to chuckle to myself, your cervix is lax, and mine they couldn’t get to dilate even with meds! Heal well, my dear.

    • Lyn, Okay Miss tight pants. Oh the things we talk about on this blog. Now, I know you’ve had two kids and that’s all I will say about your cervix.
      On the last blog you mentioned the kids giving you a lasagna dinner. What a sweet gift. Glad it was edible. Bet they enjoyed doing it and were eventually proud of it. My little 8 year old GD wrote me a story and insisted it be the first gift I opened on Christmas Eve. She’s quite the little writer and of course, she knows Nana is a writer, too. Beth said she worked on it for three months. Beth sent me a lovely centerpiece for the table and said GS suggested they give me flowers once a month for four months. I’ll love that. I think that’s why it’s hard to take the Christmas lights down…I crave the lightness of being and it is so dark around here in the winter.
      Do all of you remember I told you about two of the construction crew on our street all summer were injured a couple of weeks ago? I stopped over at the construction trailer yesterday and asked about them. One is back at work but the guy who had the pressure pushed manhole cover hit him in the face, had to have plastic surgery to rebuild his face, especially his cheeks. He is now at home recovering. It sounds so very painful and I’m so grateful he’s healing. Since I used to work for a group of plastic surgeons, I have some idea of what he had to experience…plates put in his face, etc.
      I am sorry to hear your DD has trouble with her attitude. That is so painful to watch. I know, sometimes, you are the last person in the world for her to try to live up to and if her confidence is lagging, it’s hard. Glad you liked that part of the poem. That is the essence of this blog…age can’t matter and I hate those who use it as such.


      • Well Jennie, now we know the REAL truth 🙂 Wasn’t the tightest BUTT you wanted huh ?? LOL !! Sorry I couldn’t resist ! I have always done the Kegel exercises. Something my SIL taught me to do when I was just a teenager ! That and holding in my tummy and keeping my shoulders back ! However, I still wee on myself if I sneeze or laugh too much !
        Love ya

  4. Great start to the new year Sue. Jan starts off the birthday parade in my family as well. 4 this month, 2 granddaughters, 1 grandson and my DIL. Then in Feb is Judy;s mine, my son’s, and two grandchildren. Another year older and more things behind us. So much more to look forward to , pain cannot have my life. I amy not be able to do what I used to do, but there are new things I can do.
    Chris, I think younger than I am as well, sometimes it shocks me to realize how old I am. 🙂 You rest as well. Got my Christmas stuff almost put away. I made me some soup in this cold cold weather we are having . High of 20 today, glad we didn’t get all the snow that Lyn had. I am tired now and watching movies. You take care and talk to you tomorrow.

    • Tonie, I kept falling asleep on the last blog when I tried to answer your entry about your shopping trip. Sounds like you had a ball without bucks. To have a cousin report to you she saw someone who looked like you but was afraid to approach her? That was priceless, since it was you. It sounds like such a charming, Americana type area.
      I know you’re hurting right now with this fierce cold. So many seem to be going through that. Your weather has been nuts with the swings in so many temperature directions.
      Sure hope you can get to see the PBS airing of DOWNTON ABBEY Sunday night. If not, we’ll figure out some way for you to see it. It should be in video stores after Jan. 28 because it goes on sale on DVD that day here in the states.I know because I’ve pre-ordered it on Amazon. Hey, I’m addicted just like everyone else is.
      It’s cold here but not as cold as so many of you. Hope the pups have rested up from your Christmas trip and that your virus has finally left you alone. What a time of it.
      I haven’t even started to undo Christmas yet…too pooped. Stay warm dear to Judy. Love ya, Sue

      • Sue:
        If JUDY ever comes home maybe I can try to turn my antenna 🙂 I have to borrow her big pipe wrench to do it with . She will be home tonight, I will try to do it. If not, I will see it another way. Ms Alice’s daughter (alice) orderd a lot of Shaklee last month and got a free canister of the 180, she gave it to me. In just under a week I have already lost near an inch around my midriff. I really love these shakes. I know Jim did good on them also. I throw some frozen fruit in it, soy milk and dun ! It is giving me a base to get going on better health. I got a lot of rest yesterday and slept good last night so I feel better today. I got most of my Christmas stuff done yesterday and today is laundry ! Take care, glad you are getting rest.


  5. Perfect poetry, perfect timing and perfect sentiments. I sometimes feel a hundred years old and the same day surprised to realize I’m 51 years old. I don’t think I can be that old yet. I’m sure I was just 35 yesterday. My mind is in a good place despite everything that has occurred recently especially the loss if my beloved POW. She was a one in a lifetime kind of a dog but nothing lives forever and she had a wonderful quality of life except the last few days. What more could I ask? I still have my dear Nessie as well as the not so bright Eddie and Flirt. They are sweet though and I do love them too. Unconditional love keeps me going. I did have a chat with my sister and I think she understands that I need more emotional support even if its talking in the phone not just short texts. Chris, slack eh? At least you have one lol. Mines been gone for years……

    • Laura, thanks for your kind words about this blog. I just had aging on my mind. Sometimes, in fact most of the time, I consider and pray about what will touch people’s hearts and minds and it’s usually something that is also currently an issue with me. We all truly have so much in common.
      I know you are still so filled with grief and this year, we share that with you, having lost our Annie. Jakie has not been the same since we lost her and is only a year younger than she was. Grief is a long process, as you know and it can suck the joy right out of you as it heals. I pray this will be a better year for you.
      I’m so glad you had a good conversation with your sister. I have often found good friends just as good or better than a sister for understanding. No baggage.
      Do take care…awe shucks…you’re still a young sprout. Love you, Sue


    • Where exactly do you live Laura. Are you from Canada? I have this brain fog that keeps getting worse. Maybe you already told me. I feel for you loosing your best friend, but Nessie sounds very smart and Eddie and Flirt are probably the ones that make you laugh. Does your sister live far from you or close by? Hope all goes well for You Laura. Thinking about you and sending prayers and angels.
      love ya

      • Hi there. I live in southwest lower Michigan, Kalamazoo. We get a fair amount of lane effect snow but with this storm it’s more like living in the artic. Temps today were below zero with wind chills around -30F. I’ve resorted to putting fleece jackets on the shelties that have been shaved for skin issues and they only go out for a few minutes at a time. I doubt I will leave the house for another day or two myself.

      • I love the name of your city. Sounds like a fun place. This storm is insane for eyeryone. I have a friend visiting Florida, she posted that it was -4 there and they were freezing. I think it will last for a couple more days and then it will get back to normal, whatever normal is right. I can’t believe how cold and how much snow we have for January but the freezing rain killed me. Didn’t have enough time to shovel the snow from my deck ( cause that is all I can do) and now it is frozen solid. Very difficult to walk out there but that is where I have to go to put Molly in her pen. She doesn’t seem to mind the cold at all, she even cries to go play or walk outside. (Old English Sheepdog – 1 year old) My husband has made paths for me to walk around our property, that is still okay for me to do with Molly. Thank goodness! I tried snowshoeing but my knees just can’t do it anymore, especially breaking trail.
        Nice to hear your dogs have fleece jackets to put on cause it doesn’t take long for skin to freeze these days.
        Stay warm Laura and be safe. Hope all is going well with you.
        God bless.

  6. Thank you Sue. I found this post to be very timely. I have really been feeling my age these last few months. Your posts always help me get things in perspective. I hope you are doing better and know you are always in my thoughts and prayers. Janet

    • Janet dear girl, Good to hear from you. I know…I feel very old many days and have to pick myself up. Changes the meds has helped me have a faster pulse and changing from the meds that seemed to be making me nauseous and affecting my eyes has really helped. Hope you aren’t too terribly cold in TX. How was your Christmas? If I ever get my sore behind down there to your state to see my son’s family, I’ll be sure to say hi. Love, Sue


    • Hey Jennie Poo !!
      I know, I miss my lights when I get up at night ! THey make the house so cozy ! I cleaned up a lot before I decorated so it looks better anyway. Now I have to finish my painting I started last fall ! Boy time flies. My oldest granddaughter will be 16 this month. It don’t seem right. I have a ring she wanted saved back for her, I don’t want to mail it. But sent her a card with Mcdonalds coupons and enough money to buy her and her sister (her bday also) a burger each ! Kids are easy to appease ! It is cold here as well, but warming up some tomorrow ! I saw the previews of a French movie on a video last night, thought of you. It is dubbed, but it looks very interesting. French is such a romantic language (unless they are mad 🙂 I can read bits and pieces but never studied it at length. Hope your Tim doesn’t loose his job and that Nana comes thru for you !! 🙂 If not adopt you a kid, there are a lot out there that could benefit from an adopted Nana , and you don’t have to keep em !! Love you my friend.
      Take care

  8. Chris, so glad he found your problem and got you all fixed up now. Well, I’ll allow a few days for healing, but basically, it’s on the upswing.
    Sue, loved this post. Oddly, I don’t often think about aging. I was always so happy to have been born in the time period I was, I’ve seen so much happen and change, exciting time to be alive, I think. Hopefully, wisdom will come with age, so I’m looking forward to that. Just hope I can remember that I’m wiser!
    When people complain about aging, I think so much of my sister Becky. She hated aging more than anyone I ever knew. When she turned 30, we all had to go spend the day with her…of course she was the baby, we were old hands at 30. I didn’t get the big deal, but knew it was to her. When she turned 40, her hubby even had to take off work to console her. Both times she cried all day. Her 50th birthday, he took her shopping at Victoria’s secret, the clerk made a comment about how sweet he was to take her shopping for her birthday. She started to cry, said “you don’t understand, I’m 50”, he finally had to call Kathy to help him get her home. At 50 she got braces for her teeth, she did all she could to stay and look young. They say be careful what you ask for…for she will not have to cry over 60. Of course I did the half and quarter ages, but, once I was old enough to vote (21) in my day, I had reached all the age milestones I could think of to look forward to the next age. It would come, or not, as God saw fit, and I’d be content either way. Maybe because I had the arthritis at 15 and have live in constant pain the last 50 years, I never really have thought of my pain as an “aging” thing. Although I did recently make the statement “I’m too young to feel this damn old”. My mind has trouble believing it’s much over 16 or so, but my body stops it in it’s tracks if need be.
    I slept almost 24 hours and think I really needed it. I feel better this morning, but that’s a relative term, don’t feel great, but by no means feel as bad as I did.
    OH, this line of your poem:

    As children age was in quarters and halves
    We always wanted to get big.
    Each birthday was expectant
    Like new hair on our thingamajig.

    I didn’t get the last line at all. All I could think of was my uncle. My mom’s baby brother is only a few years older than his 4 oldest nieces and nephews. He had this “thing” about growing hair on his chest. I can recall so many times him calling us to his room, to show us a new hair he had found. Or asking us to count them! I got two good laughs out of that line, one in thinking of Ron, the other in realizing what you meant! That didn’t count much to us girls, we measured chest and cup size…our “real” rite of passage!
    Tonie, I don’t know about your area, but here we think of Greensboro as “the big city”. It’s the largest city near us, but yet it is still small enough to run into people you don’t expect to see. I know up your way you’re closer to some larger cities.
    Trish, I know your area some too. I used to spend a lot of time in Charlotte, when my BF lived there with her mother. She’s at the beach now, so I haven’t been down there in quite a few years. I can’t imagine working at Cracker Barrel with fibro. Retail jobs are hard at best. I do love Cracker Barrel, though. I love to eat there when I’m traveling, food is always consistent and the quality is good. I love the store part, even though I think it’s a bit pricey. But, even shopping, I can’t stand in there but so long. My prayers go out to you and your hubby. I know the upheaval in your life is rough by itself, but will all the other going on, it’s a real call for some serious praying.

    If anyone is looking for a gift for Tonie, we all now know she’s needs a pipe wrench of her own!
    It stayed in the teens all day yesterday but is supposed to get up to freezing today! Just glad it’s dry. I’d sure hate to have that northeast snow. All there, please be warm and safe.

  9. Linda:
    Yep Greensboro is a bigger city, however, we are near to Bristol and not that far from Knoxville. I don’t really think of them as big cities having lived in one of the biggest 🙂 But I sure can drive easier in them having had that experience ! Used to get so nervous, but don’t bother me now. It is 41 here today !! But that wind is really cold still ! I am experimenting. I have a bar of scented soap and I like liquid better. I found a thing online where you can MELT it down, add some oils whatever to it and make your own liquid soap. So that is what I am doing, it takes some heat to melt it though ! Laundry is almost done, cleaned up my back room (again) and took a long hot shower ! After I dry out realy good I think I will take a walk, I need some air and exercise ! Later I have to go to the church and finish cleaning up all the Christmas stuff there (Carol and I ) Have a great day and stay healthy !!

  10. Well hi Trish
    Your story is a strong and painful one
    I admire that you work as you do ,that takes real gumption .
    I’m know you will fit in with us so well , we all have a similar past to tell.your husbands illness I am sorry to hear of… DH has had illness all his life and that in fact has chosen any career he has had ,or not . He has Menieres which has left him with only 10pc hearing in one ear ,the other ear is totally gone and balance problems. He has had drop attacks and dizziness and vomiting for 45 years …so illhealth has always been with us.
    Take heart that we all understand what you are saying and it has a home here

    • Thank you for the welcome, Chris. Yes, it’s hard dealing with my husband’s illness, especially when I think “what if?” He keeps saying he’s fine, but I can see he’s tired more so than usual. I’m sorry to hear about your husband, “45” years of it makes it sound so long! Poor guy. I hope he does get some relief at times.


  11. Tonie, I have done that, it melts faster if you shave it up. You can also grate it and put it in a bottle with a tad of water and the oil. At one time I loved to make soap, not the lye kind I often saw my grandmothers made, but the nice, soft ones. Michael’s carries all you need for soap making, too. Most scented soaps bother my allergies, so I used mostly green tea and sandalwood or lemon to scent mine. I also made a hand lotion that was solid and in the shape of a bar, it was so nice to keep by the sink. I also like a bit of peppermint in my bath soap; peppermint promotes circulation and eases pain. When I could still get into and out of the tub, I’d often get up in the middle of the night, crawl in and put peppermint oil in with it. Also lavender to help me sleep well when I got out. How I would love to have one of those walk in tubs so I could enjoy a good soak again. I can’t even find my recipe book for all those things I used to make. It was also full of notes of what helped what, and who liked certain recipes. A treasure I would love to run into again.
    I’m really for my next sleep session. Stay warm. Oh, Greensboro is less than an hour from here, Roanoke about 2, Christiansburg about 3, Richmond 4 or so. So even though I lived in LA, Greensboro is the largest city near me now.

    • Linda, WOw I didn’t realize Greensboro was so close to you. I like the idea of peppermint added to the soap, I do love mint. LA was one place I didn’t enjoy driving in !
      Take care and stay warm

  12. Well I can’t believe my post finally went thru? Ya’ll have no idea how long I have sat on the outside looking in and reading everyones posts and not being able to respond. I have so much to catch up with, I don’t know where to start.First of all I wish everyone a healthy new year. Loved the post Sue, it hit straight to heart as your post usually does. How is little George doing? You and Jim still kicking? Dail had his usual 5 days in hospital just 1 week before Christmas. I broke my foot Christmas Eve and just got to the Dr. yesterday and to the hospital for xrays before the next 9 ” of snow falls.Have a baby shower to set up for the 25th but the Dr. tells me to slow down and learn to deligate and keep my feet up. He had had the flu and told me he was so sick that it took him 4 hours to put a blanket on his feet. God forgive me but I burst out laughing. If he knew what this group goes thru in a day he would never say that to any woman.
    The shower is for my granddaughter that I raised for a good part of her life. She is giving me my first great grandson! My how time flies. Well, talk to ya’ll later and maybe get in the swing again with who’s who. Love ^j^ Barb

    • Barb, Sorry you’ve had trouble posting BUT it is so wonderful to hear from you. Georgie is such a pain in the ass. We just love him to death in spite of it. He’s stubborn, willful, active and oh so loveable. He gets his feelings hurt if I yell at him…as in catching him peeing on the good carpet. Then he goes into his kennel which is right beside my side of the bed and pouts. It’s amazing to me how the simple act of trying to clip a few hairs around his face can upset him so much. It’s like wrestling fifteen alligators! How’s dear Blu?

      Barb, I am so sorry to hear you broke your foot. That sounds remarkably painful. Do try to be good…I know, I know. Just do the best you can. How wonderful you’re going to be a great grandma. You must be very excited. I do enjoy you so much and am not sure your doctor did…Ha!

      Indeed, Jim and I are still kicking and Jim is still working much too much. When I ask him why he puts in such long hours at the jail as the RN, he says, “Because I can.” I know it’s fulfilling but I think he’s a bit too old to work 12 hour days. He can’t give any less if there is a job to do…and I guess I must respect that quality in him, although it worries me. I am about as usual, perhaps a bit worse. I have a headache going because we have to change our medication insurance carrier. I found out today after an hour on the phone they will cover my new drug I must go on…injections everyday for two years to build up my bones after breaking a vertebrae last summer. Now we’ll see what the co-pay is but the gent on the phone gave me some sources for help with the payment. Next week I will check it all out.

      Oh my, so much snow. I can see why you had to be cautious about getting out. Pack that foot in snow if it gets too swollen because I know you and know you will be up on it. You’re a hard woman to keep down. Prayers and hugs and welcome back. I’ve missed you..Love, Sue

    • Barb !! SO good to hear from you again ! Welcome home ! So sorry about your foot, I pray it is on the mend ! Congrats on the great great !! God bless and Happy New Year to you !

      • Welcome back, Barb! So good to hear from you! Now, you take care of that foot. At don’t laugh too hard at that doc of yours. 😉 (Still chuckling here.)

  13. Sue-I love this particular posting~~~as a child I thought time would never pass quick enough–and before I knew it, high school years behind me, working, and then standing at the Altar–in glorious Love as I married the Love of my Life. Now–38 years of marriage flown by and we are still taking each ride of the “Roller Coaster” ups and downs that come with life! Many moments have been glorious~~giving us memories to last forever, and we have also experienced great loss–my precious mom-in-law was murdered by an intruder in her home in 1990–my husband was on the Police Force of a major city and yet was helpless to stop such a tragic moment. We leaned on Faith-holding tight to each other and slowly found our way through this black time. The intruder was caught and will remain in prison for the rest of his life–and we have found the strength to offer a prayer of forgiveness~~~knowing it would be so EASY to allow HATE into our lives.. Time is so precious–we chose to live,and love and cry and laugh together–even as I live with Chronic Pain. We continue learning about life as we age, and cherish it more each day.

    I wakeup and give thanks each morning–although as I stumble toward our kitchen, grabbing a cup of Hot Tea, heading for a heating blanket to rest my aching Body on–it hits me that Life is still moving along and I find myself smiling more, looking forward to times ahead for me and my precious husband. Yes there will be more hurts–struggles we must face–but this is our life and we are here together! Thank you Sue for allowing me to ramble on–Bless you for this posting. Opens up the heart for all….. martha

    • Martha, thank you for sharing. So sorry for the down portions of your roller coaster, but they sure help you to appreciate the up portions that much more, don’t they? Well, in time, of course. Blessings to you and hubby.

    • Martha, Thanks for another opening up of your life to all of us. Violence is especially harsh to adjust to because it is so sudden and so unjust, but then again…is any disease fair? There is so much random injustice in this world. When the innocent suffer, I think there is a special sadness. So many lives can change in an instant as we who have been in the medical field know and with my DH working in law enforcement and witnessing the tragedy of their poor decisions and wretched backgrounds, it’s a different kind of sad. There are so many kinds of loss in this world.

      I hope you had a happy holiday with your DH and family. How true that we are never too old to learn and sometimes we learn whether we want to or not. At other times we need to watch our reactions and make choices as to how we will respond and act. I find each age fascinating and each with it’s own challenges. Do enjoy this age and this year, Sue

  14. Martha:
    Your poor husband ! What an awful thing to happen to your parent. I am glad that they caught the person responsible for it though. At least you have that peace of mind. Violent crime is so hard because we can’t understand the reason for it. Having peace in our souls is the most important thing . If we don’t have an inner peace how are we going to get along in this world. I am glad you turned toward each other and not away as some people do. God bless

  15. Martha, what a sad story but how uplifting that you both can find forgiveness. The hate would only hurt you. Your story is a beautiful testament to your love for each other. I truly enjoyed reading it.

  16. HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL. FINALLY back on my feet (just) got some kind of bug and have been trying to get over it. Good blog Sue. I never thought of age being a problem, guess it is the attitude thingy. I will turn 60 in Feb but in my head I still feel as if I’m in my thirties. Of course there are some days I feel like I’m 100.( but we won’t get into that)
    Happy to hear you are on the mend Chris. Martha what a tragic story. Happy you both had forgiveness in your hearts. Makes life so much better. Barb I do hope you take care of that broken foot. I know it is hard to stay down but sometimes you just have too.
    Linda you must have lots of patience dealing with your sister. I know, guess it’s FAMILY FOREVER NO MATTER WHAT. I get it. Laura happy to hear your sister is there for you. Jennie Poo, so happy to hear you have the insides of a 30 year old. LOL, where else but on this blog would we find that out. Slowly putting away all the Christmas decorations, it’s going well.
    Love all you guys and missed you.

    • Sue~~
      The “miracle” of this blog is simply how easy it flows–people are listening with their hearts–seems everyone has experienced major life challenges–many are fighting battles that we would not want coming our way… I am so touched by the comments from Linda, Tonie, Lyn and yourself~~~Bless you for such loving words!

      Hoping for a better 2014–perhaps moments of a smooth “roller coaster” and simply looking for some Joy…blessings to all. martha

      • Martha dear, I think of us as soldiers battling a war. It makes for great bonds of mutual respect among those from all over who would never have met otherwise. I believe this blog to be truly blessed. Sue

    • Suzanne, hope you can continue to feel better each day. It seems everywhere we turn these days someone has a virus…and all this hideous weather and severe cold. I am also slowly putting decorations away and cleaning as I go. Our basement where we store it all is so chilly right now and hauling anything at all heavy is a problem for me so I have to put it all on poor DH. Slow as we go is still getting the job done. I am trying to discard some of the Christmas things we never use anymore as i find I get more and more simple with the decorations each year.

      I’m so pleased you’re getting to know all of us and we, you.
      Have as happy a new and coming year as you can manage..hope we’ll be of some help along the way. Sue

      • All of you are such a great help to me Sue. So happy I found you on the other blog. I certainly no longer feel alone in my battle. You all make me feel welcomed and it’s nice to get advice from people who know what they are talking about.
        Want to say a special THANK YOU to Linda (smart lady) for the great wisdom she gave me at Christmas time. It all worked out, the kids did all the dishes and put everything back as I asked. I sat back and relaxed cause I don’t really think I could have moved an inch after dinner was done. What a fun day we had all together.
        Sue I’m doing the same this year with the decorations. It is just too much for me now that I have RA. The kids do not want any of our decorations, which is sad cause some are very old. I will give them to the diabetic society and hopefully someone will love them as I, my mother, my grandmother once did.
        George has to do the same for me. I can no longer lift anything heavy or I pay the price. I have it all at the top of basement stairs and he will take it down when he has time.
        I’m praying for you Sue and happy to hear your meds will be paid for. Hope the meds are making a difference but I think I read that already. (brain fog)
        Love to all, God Bless,

    • Suzanne:
      So glad you are feeling better ! Have you heard from the Rheumy yet ?? I hope so ! Happy New Year to you and yours. I think that all of us feel so much younger inside than we actually are. I know sometimes I actually forget !!
      What day in Feb ?? Mine is the 7th !
      Feel better

      • Oh Tonie , NO I haven’t yet even heard from the Rheumy. Think I will this month, like next week. I will take Sue’s advice and call the number I have. They can say yes to seeing me or no but at least I’ll know a little more. This health care system sucks. You are not allowed to just call a doc (specialist) and make an appt. You need a written referral from your GP and she keeps telling me my file is at the hospital where the Rheumy’s are and they will be getting in touch with me. It’s all insane if you ask me. I’m getting worse all the time and pain is constant once again even though I’m on mega pain killers. It could be the weather but still I really need help here.

        My birthday is the 11th. Pretty close together huh. Yes I remember my dad telling me he felt like he was 18 when he was in his seventies. Take good care Tonie and enjoy that beautiful horse of yours.
        God bless

      • Thank you Suzanne, so glad it all worked out so well for you. I had faith that it would.
        much love to you.

  17. Dear All, I believe, in keeping with the honesty and accuracy that is upheld on this blog that I need to clarify one thing. We have recently discussed the cervix in recent days. That’s a bunch of women for you! However, I must clarify that a total abdominal hysterectomy involves the removal of a woman’s uterus and the tip of it which is the cervix. Partial hysterectomies involve partial removal of the female organs, such as removal of the ovaries and fallopian tubes. Many of us who have a history of total abdominal hysterectomies no longer can claim to have a cervix…because it was surgically removed. Just consider this a medical clarification…okay? Sue

    • I just stayed silent and smiled at some of the comments. Yes I had a total hyst at age 38 which saved me from uterine cancer. I LOVE menopause. Best thing ever happened to me. By age 40 my hair was white (love hair dye) I’d lost my mom and was in full menopause. Turning 40 & 50 was a breeze after all that happened before 40. Nothing to dread.

      We are in a full winter storm with a foot of snow (shelties Ed and Flirt are up to their shoulders and Nessie is breaking trails for them). Love staying home but have no idea how dear Lynlee is tolerating the weather coming and doing a concert too. She is dedicated.

      • Laura, your Nessie is such an angel. Know you must have had a long night with your battle with the weather. Stay safe dear lady. Sue

    • This is one of the many reasons we love you, Sue. (Still smiling over this one. – BTW, I still have all my parts, though some work better than others apparently. 😉 )

    • I only had a partial hyst, my cervix is still intact because I didn’t want the bladder to drop. I have my tubes still just no uterus. So now you know my “inside and out ” !!

    • Oh the things we share here…

      Laura, this time round I’ve been careful to really take care of myself and be proactive. I know if I don’t keep my joints warm I’m done for. I think that and rest have been key so far. The concert Sunday was also for a dear, dear friend who wouldn’t care if I had to do the concert from a bed onstage, so I know I’m free to use whatever I need and do whatever I need to be as comfortable as possible. (He has arthritis, and I think RA, too.) Today is worse, as was later yesterday – not surprising. I am dreading the day as it goes on and temps plummet, and tomorrow when it’s SO cold. Right now Rufus is doing his part by curling up and sleeping on my lap. He’s right at the edge of my knees, too, so helping to warm them. Isn’t he thoughtful. 🙂

      • Warmth seems to help a lot right now. I know you do what is right for you as you do for everyone. I think you get my weather about 18-24 hours after I have it. I haven’t left the house since Saturday and have no intention of trying until the temps are at least 10 F and little to no wind. Thankfully my dad is staying home too and the people next door have checked in with him physically. I have called to check on several friends too.

  18. We’ve spent the day with freezing rain, sleet, then more freezing rain, then sleet again. Icy roads, cold, weather advisories constantly coming in. I thank God for a warm home and food in the house. I think it’s to be 2 degrees (F) tonight. Tomorrow they say snow, but whatever you call it, it’s frozen, wet, and cold. At least spring is on the way. Spring always makes my soul sing.
    Stay warm.

    • Linda:
      We are not getting that YET ! It is still rather warm out and will be until tomorrow night. Stay safe and be careful !! I too thank the Lord for my warm home as well ! So much better than last year’s hauling wood and fighting that stove !! Tuesday is the big cold day here. Take care

      • Tonie, I saw on FB that you have been out in it to do your chores..chickens, etc. Do stay safe tomorrow. You are so loved and appreciated. So glad you are warm..that hauling wood was torture but you were so strong and brave about it. Love you much, Sue

    • Oh Linda, I wanted to mention that Christmas went well. The children and spouses did the dishes, clean everything up as I asked them too. I took what you told me to heart and it worked. Thank you Linda. Just thought you should know how things went for me.. Smart lady.
      love ya

      • Thank you Suzanne, so happy it went well. Most of the time I find folks are willing to help if we tell them what we need. Why oh why do we find it so hard to ask for help, or even admit we need it?

  19. We certainly have a good humour here regarding my comment about my op!!! I love that we can say what is on our mind. And so pleased we now know …well you know!!
    Well I hope this weather you are having over there goes pretty damn quick.,awful reports on the news
    We are getting the tail end of them,less so but wind rain and bad floods
    Suzanne hope you get on the mend now
    Martha such a sad sad time and story
    My pelvic area seem to be good quite quick and stopped bleeding next day ,but now it seems to be getting sore..don’t understand it
    Ok folks be back later. Chris

    • Chris, just think about all you went through…not just the scraping but the position you were in with all your other problems. Give it some time dear lady. We are not deeply affected by the snow and cold, just a bit of frost on the ground but so many others are. Tough times for so many, especially those with chronic health problems. I think and hope you’re on the mend. Rest, feet up when you can. Love, Sue

  20. Sue, You make me smile! I am a 58 year old nurse in a critical care unit. The other day, I was making rounds and came across an unfortunate woman (the same age as myself) who was confused and taking off her hospital gown. I immediately thought, “I’m the same age as her; this could be me”. (rude awakenings).

    • Brenda, I know. It is alarming to be in situations like that. I hope the poor soul was in a temporary state. You know, sometimes rude awakenings are like a bucket of ice water in the face…but they surely do get your attention. Like wake up calls, they can herald a new day, a new experience and anticipation. Hope you feel all three today. Wonderful concept and fact to share…thank you dear lady. Sue

    • Brenda, I had a stroke at 60. I was very confused for days, and stayed a bit confused for a long time. My speech and swallowing were affected so I had to have a g-peg inserted. I had a gastric bypass, so I had no stomach for them to put this device, so it went into my small intestines. I still have some trouble with my speech and can only swallow my meds if I take them with a thick liquid. My stroke was temporal and a tad into the frontal lobe. That seems to have taken all my creative abilities away. I used to love crafts, I made jewelry, sewed, crocheted, knitted, made jewelry, Christmas ornaments, you name it, I tried it. I haven’t touched a thing since the stroke. I quit driving then, too. I once left the house, and had to stop down the road, call hubby to ask him where I was going. He rode his bike down and drove me home, had to walk back to get his bike. I still have a hard time finding my way around this small town that I have spent most of my life in. I was late to my Mom’s funeral because I couldn’t remember how to get to the cemetery, and I know I’ve been there thousands of times. (my folks were big time cemetery visitors). I used to cry and say that the cruelest thing that could happen to us is to lose part of our brain, yet have enough left to know what we’ve lost. So, I called the Spanish prof at the local community college. There was a class she was teaching I wanted to take. I told her I could barely speak English now, but what did she think of me trying to take the class. She told me “might as well talk funny in two languages as one.” So, I went for it. I aced the class, but I would sometimes forget I had class and just not show up. I would forget what I was saying in the middle of a sentence, but I pushed myself, to regain some semblance of the brain I used to have. I’m not totally back yet, but, I accept it now, much better than I did then. Lately I’ve been thinking about pulling out my sewing machine and embroidery machine, and get back into things. I hope your patient will recover and get rid of some of that confusion. It was weird for a long time, I don’t remember anything about the first 4 days. I stroked on a Sunday morning and remember nothing until I was moved to rehab 5 days later. Some things came back, more like a dream than a real memory. People would talk about coming to visit me, and I wouldn’t recall them being there. Even in rehab, I would leave my room, then go back into the wrong room and crawl into a bed. I upset a man once, I went into the room and accused them of moving my bed and taking my things. Wrong room. I was aware enough to be embarrassed at what I had done, but out of it enough not to really care. Today I’m grateful to have what “sense” I do have. I do remember my pastor coming to visit. I thought I had gone home, and the nurses and Ed were for some reason lying to me about it. I told him I didn’t trust anybody else, but I’d believe what he told me. He reassured me that I was still in the hospital but would go home soon. For some reason, I did believe him and settled down. With the fibro, I will get a “fibro fog” and it scares me. I just try to make the most of what I have and be grateful for it.
      I used to feel so bad for younger folks who were confused. I’m so grateful God allowed me to work my way through some of it.


    • Jennie dear, just saw this here at 9 am. Well this certainly sucks!! Oh my dear, of course you are frightened. I am so sorry to hear this. If we’re speaking of prostate cancer…sweet lady, it is very treatable. It might help you to read up on it and find that out for yourself..may calm you both a bit. Yes, I think waiting 10 days is awful and must agree with you it will be torture when you think of all that is possible.
      Okay all of you who truly believe in prayer…let us support our dear friend and her DH at this time…Each time she comes into your mind, send up a prayer. We all love you so much..we’re here…Sue

    • Jennie:
      Prayers for you and for DH !! Take care my dear and please let us know. We are here to support you no matter what. Love ya !

      • Oh Jennie, sending prayers and angels over the pond.
        God bless you both and try to stay calm. Do as Sue said, read up on it.
        Love you big time jennie poo.


    • Hang in there, Jennie. If it was immediately urgent, I would like to think they would have taken care of it then or pushed up the follow up. Take heart. And, like Sue said, if you are talking prostate cancer, it is indeed very treatable. Prayers will continue for you both.

      • I agree with Lyn. She is right if it was immediately urgent they would have taken care of it then.

  23. I replied to Laura above, entered it, then read and realized how much was posted since! Glad I’m finally caught up. Now I must unfortunately run out for something I forgot to get for my DD, then back to rest up for a rehearsal tonight as well as this nasty temperature drop we are experiencing. My joints are already voicing their displeasure, and I’m feeling fatigued. Can’t wait for tomorrow’s deep freeze… No benefit of pretty white stuff, either. Freezing rain yesterday, rain overnight, today WINDY and temps dropping fast. Tomorrow, single digits-low doubles with wind chill which may approach 20 below. I don’t even want to think about it. Then it’s supposed to work it’s way back up to 47 as the high for next Sunday and Monday! Ugh! I don’t like this yo-yo-ing!

    • Wow. There are already schools delaying and closing for tomorrow due to the low temps. DH’s school has been talking about it apparently as well. Of course, most kids walk to school in his district, so that makes even more sense.

      • Lyn, it is 9′ here now. We had a little dusting of snow and the plow has already been thru to scrape it off ! I have everything packed down for the night. Went up and cleaned the henhouse today and put them fresh straw out to snuggle in,. They are quite capable of keeping themselves warm in the building. I did have to go out and rescue Sadie, she got out and was wandering around. I think she was really cold, I picked her up and put her inside with the others. 🙂 Always sumthin with those chickies ! Stay warm and be safe if you go out

    • Totally understand Lyn. You try and stay warm. Will be thinking of you and sending angels your way.
      God bless you. This too shall pass.

  24. I pray all are keeping warm and staying safe ! I am all cozied up inside with the boys watching a movie. PBS had Downton online !! I watched it this am , so cool. My meal today was breakfast for supper ! Bacon, fresh eggs, toast and homemade blackberry jam from this summer ! Jam tasted like sunshine. Now it smells all cozy in here with the bacon. I had 4 little eyes on me while I ate, and they were sad I didn’t leave anything. Some things you just can’t share !
    Take care all

  25. Hope Jennie and hubby are bearing up to this such a shock.prayers for them both

    Well I didn’t bleed much Friday.then stopped by sat night.
    Then blow me it started light fresh blood tonite…and more discomfort …odd.hope it stops soon and why the crampy stuff

    More floods and storms forecast for the west and south of UK.bit windy this side
    Terrible weather over USA
    Be back Chris

    • Chris:
      You should level out in a few days. DNC will make you bleed and all the probing and scraping makes you so sore. Prayers you rest tonight and feel better tomorrow. I too am praying for Jennie and hubby. So much stuff hitting most of us through this past year. We gotta hang tight and hold on to God’s unchanging hands.
      It is -1′ here. Dropped 6 ‘ in the past hour. But oh so warm and toasty in here. Thankful the power co came thru last month and trimmed all the trees off the power lines to avoid outages like we had last year.
      This cold is only supposed to be here for 2 days, but it sure takes it’s toll ! Take care . How is your Dad doing ??

  26. Hi Tonie
    Thankyou for the info.always reassuring to hear advice, I was so shocked to hear of Jennies DH
    Good job you are warm there,not like last year when you were getting up to deal with the fire at nite
    My dad….well..on going probs.he is still the same but has got continuing probs with the catheter leaking and infections.when he is able to ,he still goes to town on his scooter
    Has a carer come in twice a day and a good next door lady who tends to now look after him …she is 81.
    Nearly 3am here awake as usual,but have been in bed most of day
    Lve Chris

  27. Hi
    Quick. Note.its 8am here rang hosp gyny line and I’ve got an appt to see them this am
    Losing quite a lot plus clots and cramp pain
    Be back Chris

    • Dear Chris, I’m sure the nurses on here are much more knowledgeable than I, but you are scaring me. I am praying that things go well for you. Please let us know how things go at the doctors. Gentle hugs. Janet

      • Chris saying prayers that all will be well. Please keep us posted. Love ya. Hoping that by this time you are home and resting.

  28. Well, Morning has arrived ! -7′ on the glass and my water pipes are frozen ! Imagine that ?? I forgot about leaving one to drip, but was up at 3 and they were fine. I am supposed to work today but am gonna call and postpone it til tomorrow. I will have to go up and check on the chickens in a while. I heard Rufus crowing this am, so know he is okay ! I will have to heat some water and take it up to pour into theirs and thaw it out. All ya’all that live in the frostier climes, sure do have my sympathies ! I don’t think I could stand weather like this for more than a couple of days !! All my windows are frosted over. Looks like Dr Zhivago in here !! 🙂 Stay warm and prayers for all of you this am.

  29. Hi all
    Well the dr at hosp thought it was an infection .and I’ve got augmentum again.only took it for the diver a month ago .not keen on taking it again
    But I have to see my own dr this afternoon as she noticed a sore swollen gland and in my groin
    Been sore for a while throbbing
    So I will ask dr about it all
    Till then Chris

    • Chris sending positive vibes and prayers your way sweetie. Please keep us posted, we are all thinking of you.
      God bless.

  30. Hya all
    Well my GP said it wasnt a swollen gland,it was a fatty lump which should go back in a while.all the muscles etc there. She said I prob strained it and it’s pressing on my hip bone.its too far over for a gland and she wasn’t worried. Such relief as many awkward reasons for it to be swollen that I don’t want..blimmin dr at hosp. But I did have it for about a month and it’s sore down front of leg and throbs
    However that’s one worry gone just the biopsy to come
    Started the antibiotics my GP said it was prob inflamed from doing it all..I was jst like this last year with it
    I’m just one of life’s bleeders! Always haemorrhage after any op
    Well that’s me done for the day,pain seems to gave subsided on its own
    Hope I sleep tonite

  31. Janet Suzanne tonie sue and all
    Well gonna go to sleep…try!
    Got hot water bottle , hot choc,.book and antibiotic…what more could a girl ask for??
    Yeah well ok!

    • Chris, Actually, I can think of a few things to add but most of what comes to mind is a distant memory. Guess we would all be happy if we could just know you are warm, safe, not hurting and healing. I think many of us with rheumatoid disease leads lives of desperate complications. It will be okay and I pray you will eventually find the complete picture here. Right now I’m just concerned for you to get some rest and answers so you will start feeling better.
      I had the grands after school today, still getting Christmas put away in the basement, went to the market in the pouring rain but have no complaints compared to the terribly painful and miserable cold so many of our friends are experiencing. Prayers for comfort to you dear friend. Sue

    • Chris:
      Pray you slept well last night and are feeling better today. It is still cold here this am and so far my car is not wanting to start. I MUST get my Jeep back from my nephew. (note to self) Still no water, but went down to Judy;s and brought back 1/2 a bucket at a time to flush the toilet with. Just praying it thaws out today. You don’t realize how many times you reach for that faucet during the day !
      Hope all is well with everyone. Jennie, praying for you and thinking of you sweet.
      Love to all

      • Tonie, I have the water problem several times a year. Finally learned to keep water in gallon jugs. I have a well and loss of electricity is a real pain. Your lucky to have neighbors near enough to help you out. Prayers for you and may this soon pass. Take care. Janet

  32. Oh Chris so happy to hear from you. You try and sleep tight sweet lady and know you have a choir of angels looking over you.
    God bless. Love,

  33. My friends, I have been trying to catch up and there has been so much going on with everyone, I don’t really know where to begin and I now believe that this blog must be read daily to keep up!
    First, I would like to say “Happy New Year” to all and wishing everyone better health and happiness in 2014.
    Sue, this was an awesome blog, but I think you already know that by all the responses, and to keep the record straight, I have had many surgeries but known have involved my cervix!
    Jennie, I am so sorry about the biopsy results of DH, You both are in my prayers.
    Chris, so sorry you once again are heaving problems post op, but healing thoughts and prayers are being sent your way from across the pond!
    Tonie. hope the water and gas in your home are flowing freely once again!

    Those of you with rheumatoid problems, I have found that freezing rain makes me hurt even more than snow, and of course the low temps are another problem. We have had -40F temp with wind chill for several days followed by freezing rain and very cold temps again, so the world outside is a skating rink, and I have mainly stayed home since Christmas. My hip replacement really aches when exposed to freezing weather … it almost feels like the steel actually gets cold! My Orencia was not ordered early enough with the holiday delivery schedule so it is over due and DH is very ill with the flu, so now I am uncertain if I should have my IV infusion tomorrow. I have heard the ER is over flowing with the flu and broken bones from all the ice
    Someone on the previous blog I believe asked about Boxing Day. It is traditionally a British holiday the day following Christmas Day, and was when servants and tradesmen would receive gifts from their bosses or employers, known as their “Christmas Box”. I believe that left over food was sometimes also given to the poor.Today Boxing Day is a bank holiday that takes place on December 26 and is observed in the United Kingdom and other Commonwealth countries.
    I crashed and burned for several days following our dinner for extended family on Boxing Day, so that is the end of any attempts by me at gatherings for extended family.The Christmas staff dinner that I had before I left work was possible because we had a four level home and placed tables on three levels, and being winter, we borrowed patio tables and chairs to seat everyone. My job was providing the venue and cooking the turkeys and the rest of the meal was supplied by others. It was a lot of fun and great team building for the staff. I guess I should have answered these questions on the previous blog but I don’t know if others go back to read new entries and I was unable to open up “A Christmas Greeting”.
    I hope all stay warm and I will try to keep caught up, hoping my hands are cooperative!
    Love to all, Brenda

    • Hi, Brenda! Good hearing from you again! -40?? UGH! We were down to -22 with wind chill and that was cool enough for me! Thanks for the explanation of Boxing Day. I know I’d forgotten what it’d originated from. Your staff dinner sounds lovely. I’m sure it was great fun for all. Hoping your DH is feeling better soon and you can get your Orencia soon. I’m sure you’ll know when it’s best to go in for it. And you probably posted the best place. I know I don’t usually go back to earlier blog posts. 🙂 Take care!

  34. Hi Brenda, nice to hear from you. As Lyn said this is probably the best place to post as I don’t usually go back either. It’s been just freezing up here also. -37 and my kitchen pipes froze for a few days; then we got the freezing rain also. It’s been a hard winter that way. Hope your DH feels better soon. I’m not sure what Orencia is, but sounds as if you need it. Hopefully you will get it soon.
    HAPPY NEW YEAR to you and your family. Let us know how it all turns out for you.
    God Bless.

  35. Tonie
    I do hope you get some warmer weather.carrying water in this cold ain’t too good. So be careful!
    I’ve seen the pics over here and it is shocking. They say we will be getting the back end of it

    You might get in the news over there a USA helicopter come down from the base at Lakenheath killing all four of them on board
    It sounds all horrible becos it happened last night and the bodies are still there this afternoon,as there was live munition on board and it has spread is just infront of the village which we go to on the marshes, and it is very desolate just missed , luckily , a pub there they’ve cordoned off the roads .it sounds very sad as they can’t get to them with the threat of munition and have to make sure they have it all.they go training over the area , it is a small fishing village .it is all in flood there too. So it was a sad night. I will keep you all updated from our news reports.

    I’m a bit better ,but these tabs make me feel weak and strange thoughts.i had it last time too like in a half dream and then you say to yourself ‘that’s not true!!’ It’s wierd.but I’ve stopped bleeding and it’s not as sore

    Ok back later Chris

  36. Those poor bodies are still out there for another night .there is wreckage all over the shinge beach..they cannot get all the bullets from it They have the personell from the base and all the services combing it all
    This was Norfolk uk ,i can’t believe I’ve just heard on news another USA helicopter has come down in Norfolk Virginia .hope they are found safe and well
    Gonna make summat to eat now be back

    • Chris:
      Thanks for the update. God bless their families. Have they said what happened ?? I haven’t listened to the news yet. Just home and had a nice hot shower (water is back on ) Doesn’t sound very good with BOTH helis being from Norfolk on both sides of the pond.
      I am so glad that you are feeling better. Just lay low til you are off the pills.
      Love ya

      • Nope they said it would take a time to find this out
        People in the village heard a strange noise as it went down low.its on a bird nature reserve so they think it may be a bird has caused it..but they knw about the reserve there so I don’t think they would go there on pupose
        All young people with families.

        Good the water back on…warming up then?

  37. Tonie, can you not thaw snow to flush your loo instead of carrying water so far? We had a major power outage in 97 from an ice storm that took major power towers down and many people always had snow melting on top of their wood stove if they had one. We were lucky to have water in the hot tub we had at our previous house, and it worked well for that purpose.

    I’m sure I missed something ….. but what is the joke about tight pants Lyn?

    DH is still suffering from the flu but I am feeling better, so I think I will go ahead with my Orencia infusion today because it is already over due.
    Sue, I am slowly starting to put Christmas away too, and finally had enough energy to take some thank you pictures of Teddi and his Christmas present to post on Facebook.

    I thought I was one of the older members of the blog but it appears that there are several of us around 60, give or take a year. I think I would love this age and being a Nana if only I could do the things that a Nana my age should be able to do such as skating on our beautiful canal or swimming in the lake or just being able to pick the little ones up or get down on the floor to play with them. It breaks my heart every time they come to me with arms lifted up and I have to say no, Nana can’t pick you up! Hopefully DH will arrange something this spring so that I am able to get safely in and out of our hot tub at the cottage.

    Linda – you said you missed your soaks in the tub. Have you looked into the possibility of a bath lift? They are much cheaper than a walk in tub and sometimes you can find one for sale that is no longer required … just a thought!

    Chris … hope you are feeling better today! Sending healing thoughts and prayers across the pond!

    Love and Hugs to all … Pommum Brenda

    • Oh Brenda, you just hit a sore spot with me. I too can no longer pick up my grandchildren or get down on the floor to play with them. Brooklyn is only a year old and I couldn’t lift her up since she was about 1 month old. Very hard to deal with. So I totally understand what you are saying. I will be 60 in Feb. and I feel like I’m 100 when my little ones come over for a visit. Hard on the morale. You take good care of yourself. Would that be the Rideau canal?

  38. Pom mum !! Brenda ! Nana B !! Good to hear from you. UGH ! I hate the cold weather. Wow ya’all had a HUGE house at one time huh ?? I love all the traditional things each country does for Christmas. Praying that you all will be feeling better. It is bad enough living in the cold let alone all the extras we go thru huh ??
    Love ya

  39. Tonie …. I have been worrying about you and hoping you still aren’t carrying those heavy pails of water my friend!
    Our previous house wasn’t really large but a split level and with moving furniture we could seat a lot of people. We also had a large deck across the back of our house overlooking our pool, and for my in-laws 50th Wedding Anniversary we had three tables on the deck and a few more on the patio around the pool and we managed to seat over 40 people then too. I really enjoyed doing things like that, and although I thought I was feeling much better, I learned that all future dinners at our house will be for our immediate family only!

    We now have Netflix at home and are continuing to watch Breaking Bad where we left off at the cottage last fall. We are looking forward to watching the next season of Downton Abbey. Our son has said he can get us the current season on CD.

    My orencia nurse arrived and I had my infusion this afternoon so I hope DH’s flu bug leaves me alone.
    My nurse suggested that we take oregano oil at the first sign of a virus … has anyone tried it?

    Hope everyone has a good night! Hugs …Nana B

  40. My Friends, Please my inactivity during the last few days. I have been very busy but have also been having trouble with my eyes. They burn, probably from the cold wind and I’ve been out a bit more this week to shop for groceries, needing to get the chair I almost melted with Christmas lights and to pick up the grands. Today I wrote tomorrow’s blog and needed my eyes for a few hours for
    that creativity. Over all I would say I am definitely more rested up after the holidays. Took a week but am better. Now all of you…

    Chris, oh my dear. What a time of it for you. So much like last time. Let’s pray the cramping is leaving, the swelling and edema from the trauma of the surgery and the discharge is less. I pray they get it right this time and give you relief. How’s DH’s B/P? It was kind of you to give us insight into the helicopter crash over there. How very awful and you gave us an insight with the information and location. Life is so dangerous for so many and it can break your heart, huh? Pics of the crash and the recovery on our news tonight. One of the pilots was from a few miles from here. So sad.

    Tonie, well bucket maid…enough of this farm life stress. It’s bad enough you let my GD’s chicken almost freeze to death just because she had the fowl intellect of a chicken. I’ll have to share that tale or is it tail feathers with my GD. I am keeping them two days a week after school now and even though they get off the bus just a block from here, I meet her bus first and we chat…girl talk, in the warm car, then we meet my GS’s bus.They are so funny. They were both telling me yesterday they watched their Mom and Dad’s wedding video, that is what’s left of it after SIL got in hot water by filming over some of it. The grands told me they saw the part of the wedding ceremony when their parents KISSED. They both claim they hated that and thought it was icky. I assured them they would each change their minds in time.
    Tonie, I do pray your weather warms up quickly now that warming trend is on the way. How awful to have to describe your small home as a scene out of DR. ZHIVAGO. Hope that virus is leaving you alone.

    Jennie,miss you but understand you’re deeply concerned for DH’s health right now. We’re all with you you spirit. Love you..

    Lyn, oh my what you have had to go through with this hideous weather…I know you must be having extra joint pain right now. I am reassured to know those dear kitties of yours are keeping you warm and sitting. Hope you’re all traveling safely when you must. Did you get to perform the last concert? Are the kids getting to work and school or is it all cancelled…and DH? This is all so very stressful for all of you.

    Laura, Hope your spirits are staying up being so shut in right now. I saw the pics you posted on FB and was adequately impressed…whoosh. I know it’s warmer right now in Alaska than it is for you. Hope the predicted warming starts tomorrow for you and all around you. Hope your joints are not too badly aching right now but have my suspicions. Hope you’re able to get meds and supplies, groceries you need. Thinking of you.

    I’ll chat with all of the rest of you tomorrow….Suzanne, Janet, Brenda,Linda and any I have missed.My eyes are badly tearing right now so must stop. Love to each of take care because you are loved. Love you guys. Sue


    • Jennie:
      Just said my morning prayers and had you and dh on the list. nowt to worry about love, you can always know that He is gonna make things right.

      Sue, it is much warmer this am, up to 17′ already at 8. I have to leave early this am as Ms Alice has an apt at 1. So get my day in. I pray my car starts today ! And it is “shake your tailfeathers !” You tell GD that chicken is the most trouble of them all, she was out when I got home last night. I need to go and repair the fence where she is going under. I can’t believe the rest of them aren’t following. She just struts around the pen pecking at bugs and taunting them I think ! 🙂
      Today is my Hailey’s bd. 16 years old ! So hard to believe time has went by that fast ! One more this month and he will be 4. They grow up so quickly.

      Chris, hope you are feeling better this am. Rested and not hurting. Take care dear
      Suzanne, have you heard anything from the Rheumy yet ?? Meantime have you ever went on sights to read about RA and FMS ?? You really should to be familiar with the symptoms and helps. And call that DR !!
      Love to all

      • Oh Tonnie, I have read and read and read on RA. Not sure what FMS is? I am not allowed to call the Rheumy here in Quebec, you need a referral from your family doc. I go back to see her on Jan 14th. I will be leaving with a referral paper. I really need help, I feel as if I’m getting worse every day. Mornings are awful, filled with pain. I move around all day (slowly) cause I don’t want to feel that morning pain during the day. I’m totally exhausted, think that is why I got that bug. I’m praying for a good appointment with her and if not I will have to change family docs. But that is a whole other set of problems. I pray for good news soon. Thanks Tonie. Love you big time.

    • Happy to hear you are taking each day as it comes. You will know soon enough, time goes by fast but I realize that in this case it must be moving like a turtle.
      God bless you both and stay strong. Love you XXX

  42. Hi
    Tonie you have a lot of birthdays ..expensive time!
    DH and GS for me comming up.

    Well the latest the newspapers are saying on the crash is the bodies will be recovered from the site tomorrow they have trouble finding all the live ammunition
    And apparently it looks as if some geese were disturbed and were sucked into the engine
    But official results will take a time to come thru

    My bleeding has eased…comes on again suddenly if I go to loo,or if I have bent down .get the odd pain and it is tender there still. Never thought about swelling etc there Sue thinking yes ofcourse it must be with the inflammation
    DH bp is going fine but the side effects are comming on ,so we are on the last lot he can try.!
    Getting colder here but sun bright ,gives snow on the long range next week!
    Back later Chris

    • You try to keep resting Chris, you have to give your body time to heal itself. Hope DH bp side effects won’t be too bad or at least able to handle it. Thinking of you and your DH.
      God bless and love ya big.

  43. Hey there, everyone….All I can think is “wow….how am I going to keep up with everyone?!” There’s so much going on, and so many posts…and I’m still learning everyone’s name. Oh well, it will all come together in time.

    Having a quiet day here in Charlotte. I have a few days off, so it’s time to rest and do normal wifey things like laundry and cooking. Also researching on “plantar fasciitis” as it seems that has developed in my left foot/heel. Not very happy about that. It’s worse in the mornings, and I limp around like crazy. Anyone ever deal with this? Hoping I can fix it on my own, without a trip to a podiatrist. It may be complicated, though, because I’ve had surgery on this foot before. We’ll see….

    My hubby is doing okay, but he’s more tired than usual. We see the pulmonologist January 31st. The prednisone is now altering his appearance, which is unnerving to me. He’s always been very thin, but now his face is rounding out. People have said he actually looks healthier, but when I look, those changes remind me of his illness. Guess I will need to work on my thinking there, and not let it take me to a more worried state. After all, I’M a bit more round in some areas since we were married! 🙂

    Have a good afternoon,

    PS ~ Sue, we were able to watch Downton Abbey with some ole-fashioned technology — We recorded it on VCR! 🙂 It worked fine, and didn’t cost us the price of a DVD recorder, nor a new TV, nor a cable bill.

  44. Hi Trish
    I had this planter thing. The dr told me that it was from wearing these trendy flat boots! They have no shape etc to support the heel ….so I bought inserts just for them they have a shape to go under your heel
    They are just for this thing.also I rolled a tennis ball under it and just infront of the heel in that hollow.and it all went slowly about 6weeks and I still wear the inserts in all my shoes but have had no more trouble
    Hope you completed all your chores.
    Never mind about hubby’s shape as long as he feels ok on them that is a big hurdle ,this living aside an illness is the sh.ts!

    • Thanks, Chris! Yep, no more high heels for me. My ability to wear those type of shoes has slowly disappeared over the last few years. Now, I have a couple faithful, comfortable shoes that don’t cause pain. 🙂

  45. Trish:
    Good to see you back ! I also have had troubles with the Plantar. Ice packs on the heel, inserts and doing the stretching exercises. I did have to get a shot finally. It cleared right up and I have had no problems since. Just gotta be careful about flat shoes with no support. I have really high arches . GLad your hubby is doing better. Prednisone helps but it sure does change one’s facial structure. You take care .
    God bless

    • Hi guys, I just had to say prednisone is doing a number on my face also. Need the meds so I’ll just have to put up with it for now. Love to all. XXX

    • Thanks for your note Tonie…How’d you like that cold, wet weather we’ve had over the last couple weeks? You’re north of me, so I think you got the brunt of it. News said tonight that more rain is coming and then cold on Wednesday…..

      Which way is Florida!?!? 🙂

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