IN THE WAITING ROOM

Rise above your burden

On Monday, when I arrived for my radiation therapy, the machine was broken. They had two physicists working on it but the folks who came after me for later appointments were walking in and there we were. All of us were waiting to have some part of our body irradiated due to cancer.

My thoughts were more on the sitting aspects of the wait. It wasn’t like I had anywhere important to be but after the two hour trip from home that morning, my derriere was talking to me…no, not that way, but screaming in pain. As folks poured in, the grumbling was beginning. I couldn’t stand that so I sort of started a group therapy session. One funny old lady who had a pinwheel stuck on her wheelchair was working on a puzzle she tries to put together each day as she waits, only to have the cleaning lady take it apart each day. Another was a woman who spoke only Chinese, and a young man with a withered leg. Others, as I came to find out had cancer in various areas of their bodies. We all began to share our histories, how long we had been coming for therapy, etc.

I was so pleased with the camaraderie that began to grow. We didn’t fall into the trap of “poor me” or “I’m the sickest one of all.” I hate it when that happens. Does it matter since each of us feels what each of us feels?

The nurses who came out to apologize seemed surprised at the friendly atmosphere. I think they were afraid they would need a whip and a chair but instead, we were all laughing. I suggested we send out for a pizza and wondered if they’d let us eat it there. We didn’t have to but if our blood sugars fell any lower it would have been a consideration.

I forgot for a while about my rear and came to see the pain, the sorrow and the humor in the candid faces surrounding me. I believe each of us began to realize we were in the company of fellow cancer patients who also had many other problems, and that can help us…that identification with others helps us to know we aren’t alone. Pity parties can be lonely events and if you’ve noticed, they are usually attended only by one person.

I was sitting there with folks with melanoma of the bone, lung cancer, another one with breast cancer as well as an unknown sufferer who didn’t speak English. One of the caregivers had fibromyalgia and polymyalgia rheumatic. One had a previous drug problem, two were widowed and so the stories went on. Each one had a pet who gave them unqualified love and we shared, simply shared our lives. The time went by quickly.

You all know me. I never met a stranger and can’t stand that polite stillness that’s in a room with hospital gowned individuals who are pretending to read magazines to keep from looking at the other poor victims. We are human beings who have much in common, regardless of our age, sex or state of health. I have learned writing this blog over the last nine years, when we are in reduced circumstance through a weakened health condition, we need the compassion and sharing that cries out from our suffering. It’s up to us whether or not that cry is answered by others or if we wish to commiserate alone.

There will always be the “I’m sicker than you are” types. There will always be the “I only want to talk about me, not you” folks, and unfortunately there will always be the gloom riddled individuals who have no idea they share their humanity with a whole world full of wonderful other people because they’ll never get beyond their own noses.

One of my favorite writers, besides C.S. Lewis is Glenn Clark so please let me quote a favorite passage written by him. “Whenever we meet another individual who shares the Idea, our hearts rush out to meet him…If my kinsman has trod his path more firmly than I, and followed it more firmly to our common goal, then I hope he will reprimand me with all the severity he knows because I have lagged behind. The lack is not in the Idea to which my days are pledged but to my own faltering footsteps. Looking back, I wish I could reclimb those stretches where I have faltered.  When comes the day that we know even as also we are known, I am sure that our greatest embarrassment will lie in our faltering; we will be chagrined that we asked too little, claimed half-heartedly, paced out preemption with too short a stride. We will stand amazed before our niggardly acceptance of God’s great grace and laugh aloud at our lack of credulity.”

You see, my dear friends, we are joined by our one great Idea of hope in face of adversity, belief in the face of pain and knowledge we can survive…with help.

Believing in the future is difficult at times when all of life is dark due to pain and suffering but a future we will certainly have and it can be more than we dare to hope. Don’t let your illness or injury rob you of your life. Fight for it. I have found it so difficult to achieve alignment within my soul, my body and my personal and social life; when all works together it is wonderful but it can be difficult. Physically it can require physical therapy, stretches and exercise. In my personal and social life it requires my not shutting out others and acceptance they also have pain and sorrow at times in their lives and not to undervalue it. In my soul, that is private growth from the sources I choose and prefer the sources of light, hope and valor. Let us all expect more than we currently have, okay?

Look up, not down. Expect more, not less. Achieve all you can for the state you are currently in. No regrets for that wish you cannot control and attempt to control what you can. We’re united by this fight, just as those folks sitting around in the cancer waiting room.

91 thoughts on “IN THE WAITING ROOM

  1. SUE, THAT WAS JUST WONDERFUL. IT BROUGHT ME TO TEARS. IT WAS JUST THE TONIC I NEEDED TO READ RIGHT NOW FOR MY SAGGING SPIRITS AND PAINFUL BODY. IT IS SO HOPEFUL. i LOVE THE QUOTE AND I ALSO LOVE C.S. LEWIS. I WILL NEED TO RE-READ THIS ONE OVER AND OVER. I AM GLAD YOU HAVE BEEN ABLE TO PUSH YOURSELF AND EXPLORE PORTLAND A LITTLE BIT WITH YOUR SON AND CREATE THESE GOOD MEMORIES. I HEAR IT IS A BEAUTIFUL CITY, AND I WOULD LOVE TO VISIT IT ONE DAY. I AM SORRY ABOUT YOUR “SITTER” AND I PERSONALLY KNOW HOW DIFFICULT AND PAINFUL IT IS TO SIT FOR ANY PERIODS OF TIME WITH S.I. JOINT AND SACRUM PROBLEMS. HOPE YOU GET TO REST THIS WEEKEND AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE. THINKING OF YOU AND THANK YOU ONCE AGAIN FOR A WONDERFUL BLOG WITH JUST WHAT I NEED TO HEAR!!! LOVE, JO

    • Jo dear, thanks so much for your understanding but I do regret the means by which you empathize…bad ass knows. I do love it when something I say strikes a chord in another heart, especially when it’s someone I’m very fond of. Hope you’re staying well dear girl until the insurance clicks in..at least as well as possible. Hope you DH likes his new job.
      I’m enjoying being at home and relaxing and not moving which is difficult with so much needing to be done right here. Flowers need water, dust needs to be lifted, dogs need to be bathed and here I lie. It will wait except for the plants.
      Yes, Portland is interspersed with rivers and lovely homes and gardens. Hope you get to see it sometime. Love you dear, Sue

  2. SUE……THAT WAS BLOODY AMAZING…WOW! I CAN JUST IMAGINE YOU AND ALL THE OTHER GUYS SITTING THERE WAITING WITH TREPIDATION, AND THEN STARTING TO TALK, AND SHARING YOUR STUFF, YOU ARE ONE FUNNY AND SWEET LADY, I TOO LIKE JO, HAD TEARS IN MY EYES………..NOW I WILL PRAY FOR NOT JUST YOU, BUT THEM TOO….KEEP US POSTED WITH STORIES SUCH AS THESE, THEY ARE WONDERFUL, AND THAT YOU CAN ALL SEE THE HUMOUR IN THE FACE OF ADVERSITY IS JUST GREAT………I LOVE YOU…..JENNIE XXXXXXXXXXX

    • Jennie, I was reading your later comments and am sorry to hear the old gut is complaining. I know…it is so disgusting when we have to worry and protect our intestinal activity every day. I’ve always found my IBS is best when I can go every day. I think it’s the intestinal pressure and it sounds like that’s what built up on you the other night. I found a great, mint flavored enzyme mix made from papaya and many other enzymes and chew it after dinner. It helps. I’ve been drinking a lot of extra juice and find I get tired of prune juice and have switched to pure, unsweetened cherry juice and it has the same affect. It’s more tasty mixed with another one like white grape juice. Bulk is important, I know, but I’m at a point I am so sick of Metamucil I can hardly swallow it. Right now I’m also having trouble because radiation treatment causes extra dehydration and with the Sjogren’s I’m always dry so I should be drinking all the time. I just get busy and forget to do it.
      I’m glad you enjoyed or were touched by the blog. I just write what I experience sometimes when I can’t take the time to do much research. You are all way too generous with me, you know. Life is just out there waiting to be discovered. I think some folks just get caught up in their own problems and forget to look. I think life is always funny, even in the midst of tragedy. George, human beings, my own body changing, etc. If they aren’t humorous, then we aren’t looking.
      Please be good sweet lady and I don’t know what that diet is you were talking about either. Explain, please. Love you, Sue

  3. Sue, dear, your blog this week made me cry. This came at the perfect time as I am dealing with a very dear friend who lost her son in an automobile accident last week. I’m also trying to be strong for my son who suffered a loss of his own this past week. What a God given gift you are to all those folks in the waiting room, as well as to all of us who know and read your beautiful words each week. Even while you are suffering immeasurable pain from your sitter, battling breast cancer and other maladies, you manage to display such strength, beauty and grace. It makes me wonder if you’re not really an angel whom God has sent to earth to teach us what love and compassion is all about. I love you so much and pray for your healing and comfort. Wishing a restful weekend for you. ❤

    • KAREN……HELLO LOVE. I WAS SO VERY SORRY TO HEAR OF YOURS AND YOUR SONS LOSS…..LIFE IS CRUEL OFTEN ISN’T IT? IT TAKES SPECIAL PEOPLE TO SEE A FUNNY SIDE TO THINGS WHEN THEY ARE AT THEIR LOWEST EBB…..HOPE THINGS IMPROVE FOR YOU AND YOUR BOY OVER TIME….GOD BLESS…JENNIE X

      • Jennie dearest, Thank you for your kind and caring words. I’m so very, very blessed to have a young adult son who is comfortable enough in our relationship to share his most vulnerable thoughts and fears. I just love this blog of Sue’s where people reach out to others. It’s contagious, you know? You and Sue reach out to me and the next thing I know, I’m reaching out to complete strangers in places like the grocery store, a restaurant, etc. god bless you, Jennie! Karen xo

    • Karen, I’m pleased the timing worked out well for you with this blog but filled with sorrow about your friend’s son. How terrible that must be for her and her family. And for your son, a special prayer. I am so sorry for his loss as well. Death is so foreign to so many young people, it hits with a special force, you know?
      I’m a little embarrassed when you say such things about me because I’m just a woman on the field of battle like the rest of you, striving to live my life the best way I know how under terrific odds most of the time. Love your latest self portrait on FB. Very pretty and tranquil looking. Take care dear girl, Sue

  4. Sue lovely beautiful I could go on….
    And I endorse Karens words above so true
    I hope you have a restfull weekend and Jim too
    Im off to hit the sack been a busy two days with my dads 90th birthday today.all went well
    Be back when more with it…huh?….
    Chris

    • HI CHRIS…….HOPE YOU ARE NOT TOO FRAZZLED WITH ALL THAT SOCIALIZING YOU HAVE BEEN DOING,HOPE IT ALL WENT ACCORDING TO PLAN AND DAD LIKE HIS PREZZIES…..CALL YOU IN THE WEEK FOR A CATCH UP…….LOVE YOU….JEN X

    • HI CHRIS, CAN’T WAIT TO HEAR ALL ABOUT THE PARTY FOR YOUR DAD. 90 YEARS OLD IS CERTAINLY SOMETHING TO CELEBRATE.
      HOPE YOU ARE NOT PAYING THE PRICE NOW FOR ALL YOU DID.
      LOVE YOU BIG CHRIS.
      XXX

    • Chris dear, glad your Dad’s birthday went well for his sake and yours. I hope you got caught up a bit on your rest but I suspect you’re still not sleeping. Hope DH’s health is calming down and the latest B/P meds are settling in without side effects. I agree with someone else who suggested we’d love to hear more about Dad’s party.
      Sorry this is late. I’m moving like a snail with fatigue right now. Burn not too bad from the radiation therapy. Rest sweet lady. Love, Sue

  5. WELL SUE I SAID IT BEFORE AND I WILL SAY IT AGAIN. YOU ARE AN ANGEL SENT FROM ABOVE. I LOVE WHAT YOU WROTE THIS WEEK AS EVERY WEEK. I ALSO CRIED WHEN I READ THIS. FUNNY THING IS WHILE I WAS IN THE WAITING ROOM ONE OLDER MAN WAS NOT HAPPY WITH THE WAITING TIME AND I COULD SEE HIS POOR WIFE TRYING TO DEAL, SO I STARTED UP A CONVERSATION AND BEFORE WE KNEW IT THE DOC CALLED ME AND TOLD HIM HE WOULD BE SEEN SHORTLY. IT FELT GOOD TO GET THAT MAN LAUGHING AND HIS WIFE TOO.
    THANK YOU FOR ALL THE LOVE YOU GIVE US EACH WEEK. I USUALLY PRINT THE BLOGS OUT NOW SO I CAN READ IN MY COMFORTABLE CHAIR WHEN I START TO FEEL SORRY FOR ME. I WILL DO THE SAME THIS WEEK.

    JUST WANT TO LET EVERYONE KNOW I DID SEE MY INTERNIST AND HE THINKS (FOR NOW) THAT I HAVE OSTEOARTHOSIS.
    HE GAVE ME LYRICA AND I GO BACK AND SEE HIM IN JULY TO SEE HOW THE PILLS ARE WORKING. HE WAS SO KIND, SMART AND VERY GENTLE. THAT IS WHAT I HAD PRAYED TO GOD FOR. THOUGHT I HAD AN APPT WITH MY FAMILY DOC TODAY AND ARRIVED JUST ON TIME ONLY TO FIND OUT MY APPT IS ON JUNE 17, NEXT TUESDAY. MY FRIEND AND I HAD A GOOD LAUGH ABOUT IT. WASN’T A BIG DEAL SINCE I HAD TO GO PICK UP THE LYRICA AND IT’S IN THE SAME BUILDING.
    AFTER LOOKING OSTEOARTHOSIS UP, SEEMS TO BE THE SAME AS OSTEOARTHRITIS. IF SOMEONE CAN EXPLAIN THE DIFFERENCE I WOULD BE GRATEFUL. BUT I DON’T SEE ANY AS YET. THANK YOU FOR ALL YOUR PRAYERS. I DO BELIEVE THIS DOC WILL BE GOOD FOR ME.

    SUE I HOPE YOU HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND WITH DH AND JAKE AND GEORGE. HOPE IT CAN BE A RESTFUL ONE BUT IT IS FATHER’S DAY HERE THIS WEEKEND, SO NOT SURE IF EVERYONE WILL BE GOING OVER TO YOUR HOUSE TO VISIT DH.

    SENDING YOU HEALING PRAYERS MY DEAR FRIEND AND GUIDING ANGELS, AND ENOUGH STAMINA TO GET THROUGH ALL YOU HAVE TO DO THIS WEEKEND TO GET READY FOR NEXT WEEK. LOVE YOU SUE.
    GOD BLESS EVERYONE ON THIS BLOG. XXX

    • SUZANNE……GREAT TO HEAR YOU GOT THE HELP YOU NEEDED…..PRAYERS PAID OFF THEN????
      OSTEOARTHRITIS IS A DEGENERATIVE JOINT DISEASE…..OSTEOARTHROSIS IS A GROUP OF MECHANICAL ABNORMALITIES INVOLVING DEGRADATION OF JOINTS…INCL ARTICULAR CARTILAGE AND SUBCHONDRAL BONE……ANY CLEARER? NO NEITHER AM I, BUT I KNOW THEY ARE VERY SIMILAR, AND THE DRUGS GIVEN OFTEN TREAT BOTH ACCORDING TO ADVANCEMENT OF THE DISEASE……..YOUR DOCTOR SOUNDS JUST THE KIND OF GUY YOU NEED, CAME AT THE RIGHT TIME FOR YOU……HAPPY ABOUT THAT……ENJOY THE WEEKEND LOVE, AND HOPE YOU GET THE RELIEF YOU NEED……LOVE YOU…JENNIE POO XX

      • THANKS JENNIE POO, WELL AT LEAST I’LL SEE IF THE MEDS WORK FOR ME. I IMAGINE IT WILL TAKE A LITTLE WHILE BEFORE I FEEL THE EFFECTS. STRANGE THOUGH, THE SAY A SIDE EFFECT – WILL MAKE YOU SLEEP. WHEN I TOOK MY FIRST PILL LAST NIGHT, I WAS AWAKE FOR HOURS BEFORE I FEEL ALSEEP. HMMMM.

        HOPE YOU HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND. IS IT FATHER’S DAY THERE? WE ARE GOING TO OUR DS FOR SUPPER ON SUNDAY.
        LOVE YOU LOTS. AND THANKS FOR THE INFO.
        XXX

    • Suzanne, Jennie is correct. Anytime you see “itis” used in a word, think inflammation or activity. Where as “osis” is usually the condition but not inflamed. I think he’s telling you you have arthritis and it’s the osteo variety which arrives with age and use over the course of our lives. I think you need to give the Lyrica a little time and it might help and it might not. We’re each so different. I like the description of the doctor. He sounds perfect for you right now and hope July comes quickly for you but he’s giving you time to get results from the meds, etc. Hang in there. You might not be well again, but you can find ways to cope. Each of us have had times when physical therapy has been the strengthening answer. The lousy, diseased parts of our bodies win if we don’t kick against the trend. We must stay strong. That reminds me I need to do some tonight before I sleep. Trying to get back the complete movement back in my right chest muscles. Take care, rest but look into PT. Love, Sue

      • SUE, I JUST FIND IT STRANGE THAT IT HIT ME ONE DAY – BANG AND THEN I STOPPED WORKING. I WOULD HAVE THOUGHT AN OLDER PERSON WOULD HAVE THAT. I WAS 57 WHEN IT HIT ME LIKE A TON OF BRICKS.
        WELL HOPING THE LYRICA WILL WORK. WHEN I SEE MY INTERNIST I WILL ASK HIM ABT PT. THAT IS NOT COVERED ON MY INSURANCE AND I CERTAINLY DON’T HAVE TO MONEY TO PAY FOR THAT. VERY EXPENSIVE HERE. HOPE HE CAN GET ME IN AT THE HOSPITAL. THANK YOU FOR THE EXPLANATION SUE. NOW I UNDERSTAND A LITTLE MORE ABOUT THE “ITIS” AND THE “OSIS”.
        HOPE YOUR FRYING SESSIONS ARE NOT TOO PAINFUL THIS WEEK SO YOU CAN ENJOY PORTLAND A LITTLE MORE. THINKING ABOUT YOU AND SENDING ANGELS YOUR WAY. LOVE YOU BIG.
        XXX GOD BLESS.

  6. Love this tale of comaraderie! I’ve experienced similar circumstances in attending a pain management class. We all shared our pain stories more quickly with each other because it was obvious why we were there. You don’t really have to go through small talk first. It is so therapeutic to have common ground and friendship can be quickly gained. Love your insight, Sue!

  7. Oh Sue I can see the whole thing as if I were in the room. I’ve noted at times in crowded waiting rooms that irritability can be contagious especially when everyone is there under stressful (at best) situations. I can see you starting the conversation and “therapy” turning lemons into lemonade. I have spent many hours in the radiation therapy waiting room (long story but many years ago) and silence was thick and no one met another’s eyes. How refreshing that despite your “bad ass” you could change the environment to lessen the fear and frustration.

    I’m rolling along as usual. I’m getting better at accepting the reality that I have to let my dear friends help me with the housework and lawn care. I don’t like it but have to admit a clean home does make my soul happy and a back lawn that doesn’t swallow the 2 old shelties is a good thing. (Front lawn has been mown by my neighbors for a few years now). Nessie is still an amazing mobility and medical alerting (on inflammation flares as well as a few other things) dog but at 10.5 I know her career is short. Thank heavens she isn’t arthritic, deaf or have vision issues. I do have my vet check her routinely for “fitness of duty”. The good news is that her “understudy” a bullmastiff pup should be born on 6/22 give or take a day. It will be a lot of work training a new puppy but to have the ability to stay independent (am a spinster you know) is worth the work. One of the breeders is my obedience co-instructor and has plans for this pups specific training. We do intend for her to show in obedience competitively (haven’t done that in years but you can show with canes as I did with Pow toward the end and walkers etc) and maybe conformation and weight pulling (daddy pulled over 3400lbs). We will see.

    • HI BOBSLED…….I AM SO GLAD YOU ARE GETTING HELP WITH THE HOUSEWORK AND THE GARDEN, I KNOW ITS HARD WHEN YOU CAN’T DO AS YOU USED TO DO, IT SEEMS TO BE THE CASE FOR MOST OF US, BUT TO SIT BACK AND LOOK AT A CLEAN HOUSE IS A MORAL LIFTER…….GLAD NESSIE IS STILL DOING OK….LOVE JENNIE XX

      • HELLO BOBSLED LAURA…. SO HAPPY TO HEAR YOU ARE GETTING HELP FROM FRIENDS AND NEIGHBORS. GOOD FOR YOU. NO NOT FUN, BUT A NECESSITY IN YOUR CASE. AS JENNIE SAID ITS HARD WHEN YOU CAN’T DO AS YOU USED TO DO, I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND THE FEELING OF A CLEAN HOME MAKING YOUR SOUL HAPPY. I HEAR YA.
        WOW REALLY IMPRESSED WITH YOUR DOG. HOW DOES ONE TRAIN THEIR DOG TO DO ALL SHE DOES? I WONDER IF MY MOLLY WOULD BE ABLE TO DO THAT OR IS SHE NOW TO OLD ( 1 1/2) T LEARN THE TRICKS OF THE TRADE. I LOVE THE FACT THAT NESSIE CAN ALERT YOU ON FLARES WOW AND MOBILITY. AMAZING TO ME.
        LAURA YOU MUST BE ONE VERY COOL LADY TO BE ABLE TO TRAIN YOUR DOG TO DO ALL THAT.
        YOU CONTINUE TO TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOURSELF. FROM THE SOUNDS OF THINGS YOU ARE DOING A VERY GOOD JOB. GOOD FOR YOU. HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND.
        LOVE YA
        XXX

    • Bobsled, I’m having a hard time imagining a full grown bull mastiff fitting in at your feet in a church pew the way Nessie does. Puppy’s are wonderful and I know you’re filled with anticipation. How wonderful to have your friend the breeder willing to help so much. You are so blessed with so many friends, you know? Good to hear things are getting cleaned up after a rough winter. Must be nice to see the ground and to have it manicured.
      As a fellow nurse you know the importance of attitude in most situations and how hard that is for most folks who are in pain and/or dreading a situation or procedure. A caring nurse or doctor can make all the difference, that’s for sure.
      My DD and SIL will be getting their new chocolate lab the first week in July and are so excited. The pics of the pups are wonderful…what a thrill. Be good to yourself, okay? Love, Sue

  8. SUE…….I HOPE YOU ARE RESTING MY FRIEND, I KNOW YOU FEEL YOU NEED TO DO THINGS, AS YOU HAVE MENTIONED IN YOUR POST……TO HELL WITH THAT, JUST GET YOURSELF OVER YOUR HOSPITAL VISIT, THATS ALL THATS REALLY IMPORTANT RIGHT NOW, THE WEEKS ARE GOING QUICKLY AND EACH VISIT TO THE HOSPITAL IS ONE LESS THAN LAST TIME….WHAT A JOURNEY YOU ARE HAVING, WITH SUCH A LOT OF LOVE AND AFFECTION AND PRAYER, YOU CAN’T HELP BUT GET WELL……..KEEPING YOU IN MY THOUGHTS SWEET LADY….I LOVE YOU…..JEN X

  9. WOW!! WOKE UP AT 2-30AM THOUGHT I WAS A GONER, THINGS GET THAT WAY AT TIMES…….GOT TO WATCH WHAT I EAT NOW, AND EARLIER IN THE EVENING TOO….GOT A DODGEY GUT AT THE BEST OF TIMES, BUT THE WHOLE DAYS FOOD JUST SAT THERE UNDIGESTED LEAVING ME WITH A BUILD UP OF ROTTEN PAIN….ANYWAY, I GOT OVER IT, AS YOU DO…SO ITS BACK TO THE 5:2 DIET, FELT BETTER ON THAT….ANYONE ELSE TRIED IT WITH GOOD RESULTS??
    GORGEOUS WEATHER NOW….BEEN TO THE EXPAT CENTER, GOT SOME BOOKS….FOUND SOME OLD WEIGHING SCALES THERE, THEY WERE IN LBS AND OUNCES, HAVEN’T SEEN THOSE IN YEARS, COST NEXT TO NOTHING, CLEANED THEM UP, PUT NEW BATTERIES IN AND “VIOLA” GOOD TO GO………ITS THE LITTLE THINGS INNIT?????? HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND MY FRIENDS, LOVE YOU ALL…….JENNIE XX

    • HI JENNIE POO, HAPPY TO HEAR YOU ARE NOW FEELING BETTER. WHAT IS THIS 5:2 DIET YOU ARE TALKING BOUT. NEVER HEAR OF IT.
      IT’S BEEN POURING RAIN FOR THREE STRAIGHT DAYS, SUPPOSE TO CLEAR UP F OR TOMORROW. HOPE SO.
      OH HOW EXCITING FINDING THOSE WEIGHING SCALES. LOVE THAT THEY AR E IN LBS AND OUNCES.
      YOUR ARE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT JENNIE, IT’S THE LITTLE THINGS!
      ENJOY YOUR WEEKEND MY DEAR JENNIE POO AND YOUR DH TOO.
      LOVE YOU BIG.
      XXX

  10. Dear Sue, That is so you. To meet a group of people, to get them talking and laughing, I can just see it. You are amazing. In a way it was a microcosm of what you do with the blog once a week. I just love it and you. Janet

  11. Sue, this brought me to tears as well, though they were not all tears of joy and compassion- a few of them were tears from that self-administered sharp kick in the seat of my pants. I think I was maybe blowing up the first balloon to decorate for an upcoming pity party. It’s been a really hard week- 2 additional days of driving to outpatient clinics (30-60 minutes to each location and an hour of sitting at each site to administer/ read TB tests). Thank goodness it’s only 2weeks a year! So between the driving and sitting stress on my “bad ass” there’s also the intense pain and soreness from the physical therapy on that same “bad ass.” So just in the nick of time you made me giggle reading about (and vividly inagining) your impromptu therapy session and pizza party!!! The picture of the flying elephant really helped too, And BOOM! (That was the aforementioned balloon bursting in a fit of giggles… Lo and behold, it was filled with sparkly confetti, congratulating me on surviving my week and managing to not let this crap rule my life!!!!)

    I intentionally “over-scheduled” my social calendar this weekend to ward off the Father’s Day blues- you know? That rude shock of ice-cold up-in-my-face reality, (who my Dad really was on the day to day basis of some very evil choices), thrown in the face of the few-and-far-between, scattered, warm nostalgic memories of him I had been clinging to (mainly from my very early childhood, and then the last couple years of his life after I did the gut-wrenching work of forgiving him for the sake of my own inner peace, the latter having given me the ability to remember the former.)

    So to that end, (avoiding the self inflicted psychic pain of dwelling on the father I had, and the one I never really had) I spent Fri evening with Laurie, Mary, and Mattie, whom I affectionately refer to as my “Junior Golden Girls Supper Club” we do dinner and a movie (sometimes out, sometimes potluck and DVD) 2-3 weekends a month. I just turned 50, Laurie and Mary are a couple years older than me, and Miss Mattie, at 88, is our only bonafide restaurant-discount-eligible senior citizen. She is a screamingly funny, pleasantly plump, slightly irreverent, old-school Bible-thumping Southern black lady who used to be Laurie’s housekeeper /personal assistant until about a year ago when she received her second cancer diagnosis. (She survived colon /rectal cancer 5 yrs ago only to develop a rapid-growth type of lung cancer that is virtually untreatable by the time it’s discovered and has since spread to her lymph nodes, and God knows where else…she chose at the time of that diagnosis to take no further chemo or radiation treatments, and no further diagnostic testing as they would only miserably prolong the inevitable. She could have another couple months to live, or maybe as many as six)
    But no pity party for her- no way! She still drives her enormous black pick-up truck, went on holiday to Jamaica with Laurie and her friend Annette (who are both doctorate-level pharmacists), still putters a bit at Laurie’s doing a little laundry, dishes, and pampering Ginger , Laurie’s extremely spoiled King Charles Spaniel with a Princess complex.

    So, picture this- Me, the artsy-fartsy girly-girl, slightly twisty, barely middle-aged single pediatric nurse; Laurie, the prim and proper (NOT!) quintessential Dallas socialite/ divorcée who’s also a doctorate-level pharmacist; Mary, the Hispanic/ Native American, Earth Mother, New-Agey yet Christian, Essential oil-slathering Registered Massage Therapist, and the previously describe, delightfully off-kilter enigma that is Miss Mattie. Then, assign us a random social scenario, from Blues Bar /BBQ joint to Five-Star Restaurant, Mafia Shoot-Out/Undercover Sting Operation on the DART Line, Mixed Martial Arts Competition, Rock Concert, Murder Mystery Dinner Theatre, the sky’s the limit… Then, count to 3 and turn us loose on Improv- you’ve got your very own “Whose Line Is it Anyway?” Type of dinner conversation. That, my friends, is the Junior Golden Girls Supper Club, also known as the Extreme Bladder Challenge: North Texas Edition.
    Ok, my insomnia is about to resolve itself, and I sincerely hope I have not blown up the Word Press mainframe. Good night and love to all, Princess Crabby Pants

    • Annie dear, the good, the bad and the ugly indeed. Clint Eastwood might not even know how rough some of us have it but his movie characters did. I loved your detailed story about all your supper club friends. What an interesting mix you have and with that type of diversification, it can’t help but enrich your life. I feel so assured knowing you are surrounded by such loving, interesting and fun friends. It makes life so much more doable, doesn’t it? Hang in there as you always do with a smile, a tear and your inner faith. Love you, Sue

  12. P.S. My most recent motto, or Mantra, chosen after my first year with my therapist, mentor, and women’s pastor, Janice, is:

    “I Choose LIFE” ❤ The Good, The Bad, The Ugly, and Everything In Between.
    (Based on Deuteronomy 30:19)

    • THAT ANNIE WAS A HOOT, GREAT STORY, YOU COULD WRITE A COMEDY OR A BOOK….I’D BUY/WATCH IT.
      I ESPECIALLY LIKED THE PS. WITH YOU THERE.
      JUST NEED TO TELL YOU THAT ONCE AGAIN CHRIS CANNOT GET ON THE BLOG…..SHE WROTE THREE LONG POSTS TO SOME OF YOU, AND AS YOU CAN SEE, THEY DIDN’T MAKE IT ON HERE, WHICH IS A SHAME, AS SHE WASN’T TOO WELL WHEN SHE WROTE THEM….SHE WILL KNOW YOU ARE THINKING OF HER AND I WILL POST FOR HER AGAIN IF SHE NEEDS ME TO…..HAVE A GOOD SUNDAY…..LOVE JENNIE XX

      • OH ANNIE, LOVE YOUR MANTRA, THINK I;LL WRITE IT DOWN AND MAKE IT MINE ALSO. AS I WAS READING IT I FELT SOMETHING MOVE INSIDE. THANK YOU FOR SHARING THE MANTRA.
        HAVE A GOOD WEEK. LOVE YA, KEEP ON SINGING. XXX

    • Annie, I want to come to Texas and go out with you and your friends! They sound so wonderful, as does the adventures ya’ll go on.
      My Dad was from Texas, too. I wonder what it is that Texas does to Daddies? Mine was a miserable B too…. But, I made my own peace, even if he never had any. When I was 40, I told him (over the phone), that I couldn’t make him love me, and I was through trying. But no matter how he acted or how he neglected his children, I would always love him, for God had made me that way. From that point on, I tried to focus only on the good things about him. He was a good singer, and we had lots of fun singing together. He told my Mom once to never tell his girls they couldn’t do anything because that was “man’s work”, for his girls were as smart as any man he knew and could do whatever made them happy. That was a lesson I always cherished. I tried to forget the unkindness, the mean remarks, the beatings, of me, my Rosa and our Mom. I knew his Dad had been a miserable SOB too, so I knew my Dad was a product of his upbringing. I was just determined not to be (merely a product of my upbringing). And even for that, I thank him. Of his 6 daughters, when he died, only I and his youngest even spoke to him. One of my sisters called me to tell me she was sorry about MY Dad. So, Father’s day is not a favorite of mine, either. I am so grateful for all the good fathers out there, and good mothers.. I’m glad many were blessed with that. It just wasn’t what God had in store for me. At least they took me to church. Sometimes they only taught me how I didn’t want to act, and that’s a good thing, too.
      Jennie, just know you’re not alone with that experience. I hope your soul can find peace with it, I know I felt so much better once I did. I did cry all day the day he died. I had wanted to see him once more, for me, not for him. But, when he got down, I couldn’t walk at all, and I couldn’t afford the plane fare to California. So, there was no way I could go. I suppose I wasn’t meant to, or it would have worked out.
      Ed never had any children. It was by choice. He was physically abused as a child, and after he started drinking, he was afraid that he would continue this on….I can’t believe he would have, even now, if we are out in public and he sees a parent hitting or screaming or cursing at their child, I have to stop him. Of course, he hasn’t drank in years and who know what a drunk might do? My Mom says my dad was an alcoholic. When I was a kid, I told him when I grew up I was going to drink beer just like my Daddy. He made a big deal of pouring out all his beer and his gallon of moonshine.. Mom said he just didn’t drink in front of me after that, but he continued. I knew he drank heavily when I was older and living in Calif. My half sister tells me he stayed drunk most of the time until he had a stroke. Oh well, to Fathers, bless them all.

      Linda

  13. FELT UPSET TODAY….EVERYONE TALKING ABOUT THEIR WONDERFUL FATHERS, ON THIS FATHERS DAY…..I DETESTED MINE…..ABUSIVE AND NASTY…..NO “I LOVE YOU” NO STORY TELLING, JUST A NASTY PIECE OF WORK WHO MADE MY LIFE HELL….I GOT A GREAT STEP DADDY THOUGH, BUT HE CAME TOO LATE FOR ALL THE THINGS A LITTLE GIRL NEEDS FROM HER DADDY….I AM 68YRS OLD NOW, SO WHY IS IT STILL SO RAW? IF ONLY MY MOM HAD MARRIED MY STEP DADDY WHEN I WAS A SMALL CHILD, HOW DIFFERENT MY LIFE WOULD HAVE BEEN…..BUT HEY! YOU CAN’T TURN THE CLOCK BACK CAN YOU???? I HOPE YOU HAVE/HAVING A GREAT DAY….AND TAKE NO NOTICE OF ME, JUST FEELING SAD…..MOVING ON NOW….LOVE JENNIE XX

    • Jennie, no, indeed you can’t turn the clock back but you reminded me once again how those first five years of life can affect one so deeply. My mother had a terrible mother who deserted her and each Mother’s Day she had such a difficult time of it. I understand. I’m glad your dear mother was relieved of him, finally. Your step dad sounds like a dear. It’s okay love, it’s just a day on the calendar and you don’t have to participate and if you do, think of your step dad.
      I also have times when I look back as each of us do and those things which were put upon us are one thing we must let go but also our decisions based on some of those events. I guess life piles up on us, one thing based on another. Go out in that gorgeous, exceptional garden and breathe deeply. Love you much, Sue

      • THANKS SUE……MY STEP DADDY DIED IN 94′ HE DIDN’T COME IN TO MY LIFE TILL I WAS 25YRS OLD, AND I WAS MARRIED WITH TWO CHILDREN…….BUT HE WAS A KIND GENTLE DUTCHMAN AND I LOVED HIM…………..
        BEEN OUT IN THE FRENCH COUNTRYSIDE THIS AFTERNOON, TRYING TO TAKE MY DH’S MIND OFF THE FACT THAT HIS KIDS NEVER EVEN CALLED OR SENT A CARD TO WISH HIM HAPPY FATHERS DAY……HIS STEP KIDS DID, MY TWO DON’T FORGET HIM, BUT OH I DID FEEL BAD FOR HIM………DO YOU HAVE TO GO BACK FOR TREATMENT TOMORROW SWEETHEART? IF SO, I WILL BE WITH YOU IN MY MIND…….I LOVE YOU…….JEN X

  14. Sue, you Bad Ass, you. 😉 I’m very proud of you, and not all that surprised that you turned those lemons into lemonade. 🙂 Good job, girlfriend! And through all the fatigue you still managed to write a terrific post. Awesome sauce!

    Suzanne, finally a direction to pursue! And your internist sounds like a good fit. Whew! Yes, give the Lyrica some time to start working. Also, there are various dosages. He may have started you with a lower dose and a higher may be needed. It will take time and patience now, but you are on the road! There are other medication options as well if the Lyrica isn’t a good fit. So happy for you.

    Speaking of happy for…. Bobsled, happy to hear you are training the next generation of service pup for you, with the help of a dear and trusted friend and trainer. I do think Sue is right. I’m having a hard time envisioning a mastiff in the choir loft, too. Haha! I’m quite sure you will work it all out. Wow, his father pulled 3400 lbs??!!! That is amazing. Good to hear from you!

    Jennie, dear, I hope you soon get that gut under control!!

    Chris, your Dad is 90? Good for him! Glad all went well, now I hope you are able to get some rest.

    Karen, so sorry for all your sorrow, pain and concerns. You’ll be in my prayers.

    Well, folks, all this talk about dogs… I’ve been perusing the local Humane Society’s webpage again. I know, I really, really shouldn’t. I found another senior that is pulling at my heart strings. He’s a miniature poodle whose owners could no longer take care of him. He’s 13 (life expectancy is usually 14-17 – yes, I looked it up.) I realize his chances of being adopted are slim and I can’t stand to think of his last days being lived in a shelter. I shared his pic with DH and have been keeping my eye on the site. I even emailed to see if he was still there and if he was cat friendly. I got a reply today. He is still there and previous owners said he ignores cats. Told DH. He said we should go see him! We may be bringing a dear senior into our home for spoiling in his golden years. I wish I could do so for more. I’ll let you know how we make out. If it works out we’ll have a full house with 3 cats and a dog!

    • Lyn dear, well, I’ll be no help at all. I love poodles and I know you feel pity but I can’t help but wonderful about the feline three and how they will feel. You know, old dogs, new tricks and all that? I’m sure you’ll do what is right for your family.
      Well, I’m packing to return for another week of frying. Last night I just plain lost it. We ordered Mexican food and when Jim picked it up my dinner was missing the flour tortillas and it was creamed shrimp and needed those. I just started crying and couldn’t stop. Think I’m cracking up? I think life just beats me down now and then. Better today but all week I’ve noticed I cry much more easily than usual. Life…Much love to you dear friend, Sue

      • BLOOD HELL SUE……I THINK YOU ARE ENTITLED TO CRY, YOU’VE BEEN THROUGH A LOT……FREAKIN’ TAKE OUT TWITS…..NO BLOODY TORTILLAS, WONDER IF YOU COULD GET SOME READY TO COOK ON THE WAY TO THE HOSPITAL, THEN GET THE STAFF TO GIVE EM’ A QUICK BLAST ON THEIR RADIATION EQUIPMENT, A MICRO MEAL IN A JIFFY…………ONLY KIDDING. WHATS HAPPENED TO TONIE, I AM BEGINNING TO WORRY????….LOVE YOU..JEN X

      • Aw, Sue, the straw that broke the camel’s back. And as Jennie said, you are more than entitled!
        As for the poodle, I just received an email that someone came in just before closing yesterday and put an adoption pending on him. I didn’t know they were open yesterday. Oh well, the most important thing is he gets adopted! She is to pick him up Tuesday, so I’ll call Wednesday just to make sure.
        Safe travel back to Portland!

    • THANKS LYN…..GUT GETTING BETTER, THINK I WAS EATING TOO MUCH LATE AT NIGHT, GOT THAT SORTED, JUST MINI MEALS AND NOTHING AFTER 6PM……SHOULD KNOW BETTER AT MY AGE….HOW IS SB DOING?…….LOVE JENNIE X

    • THANKS LYN. IT WILL TAKE TIME AND PATIENCE, BUT RIGHT NOW I FEEL LIKE I CAN DO THAT. HE IS SUCH A SMART , KIND AND GENTLE MAN. IT NICE TO KNOW I WOULD HAVE OTOHER OPTIONS. THANKS FOR THE INFO.
      THEIR SEEMS TO HAVE BEEN SOME CONFUSION ABOUT MY MEDS . SOME OF YOU THOUGHT I HAD NO PAIN KILLERS AT ALL BUT INDEED I DID HAVE OXYCONTIN AND STILL DO THEY JUST ARE NOT WORKING. MY INTERNIST TOLD ME IF THE LYRICA WORKS WELL HE WILL SLOWLY TAKE ME OFF THE OXYCONTIN, SEEMS LIKE THIS IS A HARD MED TO GET OFF OF. IT HASN’T BEEN WORKING THOUGH BUT MAKES MY BRAIN REALLY NOT RIGHT. I WILL KEEP YOU ALL POSTED ON HOW THE LYRICA IS WORKING FOR ME. RIGHT NOW I’M VERY TIRED BUT WAS BEFORE.

      OH LYN YOU ARE ALSO SO VERY KIND. A FULL HOUSE INDEED. LET US KNOW WHAT HAPPENS NEXT.

      SUE, THINKING ABOUT YOU AND THE WEEK AHEAD. MY SISTER WILL BE FINDING OUT ON JUNE 19 IF SHE NEEDS RADIATION OR CHEMO. I’LL BE SENDING PRAYERS FOR BOTH OF YOU AND GUIDING ANGELS.

      JENNIE POO, HOPE YOUR DAY TURNED AROUND SWEETHEART. LOVE YOU!

      TONIE, YOU REST UP, LOVE YOU TOO AND WANT YOU TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF. I MISS YOU SWEETPEA.

      CHRIS LOVE, HOPE YOU CAN POST SOON. LOVE YA GIRL.

      PRINCESS, YOU MY DEAR SHOULD WRITE A BOOK. YOU HAD ME LAUGHING AND CRYING AT THE SAME TIME. HOPE YOU HAVE A GOOD WEEK THOUGH. YOU ALSO HAVE BEEN THROUGH SO MUCH. LOVE YA.

      WELL OFF TO BED NOW HOPE YOU ALL HAVE A GOOD WEEK AHEAD.
      GOD BLESS XXX

      • SUZANNE…..YES LOVE MY DAY GOT BETTER……GLAD FATHERS DAY IS OVER THOUGH…BACK TO NORMAL NOW, KEEPING FINGERS CROSSED THAT ALL YOUR MEDS GET SORTED WITH THE RIGHT DOSES ETC…..LOVE YOU…JENNIE POO XX

      • Aw, Annie, thanks. I just don’t know any other way to be. 🙂 I’ve always had them in my life and they have enriched it so greatly. Sad for us, bit terrific for him, the poodle has been adopted by someone else. So happy for him!

  15. Hi All, I talked to Tonie yesterday and she’s very fatigued. She’s got so many physically challenging chores with the yard, her garden and her babysitting Ms. Alice, she’s tuckered.
    Chris, Hope you get on here soon and hope the glitch clears we miss both you and Tonie. Prayers for both of you dears. Sue

    • SUE….THANKS FOR TELLING US ABOUT TONIE….WAS REALLY WORRIED, BUT HOPEFULLY THE FATIGUE WILL PASS, AND SHE WILL BE BACK ON HERE AGAIN, PLEASE LET HER KNOW WE ARE THINKING OF HER, AND YOU TOO…..I LOVE YOU…JEN X

  16. Just testing….thinking of you all
    If I get on this tome I mite not next
    If you don’t hear from me you know I’ve tried again and can’t post

  17. Oh that is good
    Ok well
    Annie your tale was so good I can imagine all your friends together
    Laura. How do your shelties know that you are having a flare.they are so clever
    Lyn how’s SB now
    Karen. I hope next week us better for you
    Tonie you get some rest girl
    Sue
    I’ll be with you next week
    Jen. Speak soon try and catch me but I’ll email when I know time I’m in
    Where’s Martha …….

  18. Sue, such a beautiful blog. Brought tears to my eyes too. Like Annie, some was from the need to kick self in the ass. Not that I’m having a pity party, just that I’m tired of going on. Every day there seems to be something new. My eyes are killing me from the staph infection. I think the Crohn’s is affecting my mouth now. I started with a couple of canker sores just inside the corners of my mouth, then the corner got very sore, now my chin and upper lip are raw and swollen. I’ve tried everything on it, but nothing is helping. It even hurts to take my dentures in and out, let alone eat. I’m out of Humira, I called the doctor’s office twice, over a month ago and asked them to reorder it. Then I called express scripts to reorder, they never even posted the request, so I called again. It should ship out soon. I could call and ask them to overnight it, but the charge is $43, and that’s just not doable for me now. So, diarrhea is back, and the Humira should take care of the mouth thing too. At least in the research I did, it says it will. I’m going to call the office first thing in the morning and ask if he will call me in at least this week’s dose to a local pharmacy. I haven’t had any pain meds for about 3 months, either, or that’s adding to my misery.
    Sue, I have to agree with the others, you are an angel, or in the very least heaven sent. To me, this entire gang here is heaven sent, I’m so thankful for you all.
    Love to all,
    Linda

  19. Thanks, Sue. You remind me all the time to give all that I can give despite the pain and fatigue of osteoarthritis without regrets. I try to laugh as much as possible and to always do my very best.

  20. Morning Ya’all
    Thanks Sue for telling them what is going on with me. Sorry. I have just been SO very tired all the time. I push it on thru and do what needs to be done, but it is all I have energy for. Love you guys. Have you ever just been so tired your mind just can’t comprehend writing ?? SUe I am sure you have been and most recently. I do love the blog ! So like you, I always find someone to talk to that way, or two or three 🙂 I like to talk to people in elevators ! No one wants to make eye contact in elevators !
    Prayers for you all, good to see Janet back on here. Thinking of you gal !
    Be good, More later
    Love
    Tonie

      • Janet:
        Thanks sweetie ! It is heating up, gardening I shard work, and work is never done is it ?? I just push and push until I can’t 🙂 When you only have yourself to do it, well…..you just GIT ER DUN !!!
        Take care you and be careful of the heat out your way as well.
        Tonie

    • AH TONIE….THANK GOODNESS, OH POOR YOU, YES I UNDERSTAND THE FATIGUE, WHEN JUST PUTTING ONE FOOT IN FRONT OF THE OTHER, TAKES ALL YOUR STRENGTH……..TAKE IT EASY FOR A LITTLE WHILE DEAR FRIEND, YOU KNOW WE ARE ALL HERE FOR YOU, AND NOW WE KNOW YOU ARE AROUND, WE WON’T WORRY SO MUCH…….LOVE YOU BIG….JENNIE POO XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

  21. HEY TONIE, SO HAPPY TO SEE YOU BACK ON A WHOLE BUNCH OF US WERE VERY WORRIED ABOUT YOU. THANKS TO SUE WE KNEW WHAT YOU WERE/ARE GOING THROUGH. REST UP TONIE, YOUR BODY IS TALKING TO YOU. SENDING YOU LOVE AND GENTLE HUGS. LOTS OF PRAYERS FOR YOU SWEETIE.
    STAY STRONG. XXX

  22. Thanks Jennie and Suzanne. And all others who worry over me, nice to have friends ya know ? I am showered, in the bed with clean and de-flead doggies. It is way early but I am worn out. Was in heat most of the afternoon. WE had the volunteers here from the school in Georgetown. Great bunch of kids. GOt a lot done around here;. Will have more next week as well. Such a blessing that they come down here to help us out. I made me a tasty treat tonight. I had a half a bologna sandwich and some dry roasted peanuts. BUT I made some Bananas Foster with a little Kalua in it. Then put that over a scoop of mango ice cream It was super yummy !! Hope you are all doing good today and that everyone is in good health. Thinking and praying for you all
    Love
    Tonie

    • TONIE…..SO GLAD THE KIDS HAVE COME TO HELP OUT, WHAT IS BANANA FOSTER AND KALUA? I AM INTRIGUED…..TELL MAMA!!……SO GLAD TO HAVE YOU BACK MATE, DON’T OVERDO NOW WILL YOU……LOVE YOU BIG……JENNIE POO XX

  23. Gals to hear so much from everyone. Chris Lyn Jennie Tonie Suzanne Janet , Laura, and Sue, and I know I’m forgetting someone- HUGGIES to all of you. Oh of course, our dear Sue! Duh. Foggy brain.
    Had to leave work early today. Went to dr and they gave me Rx for antibiotics for sinus infection and an IV “Headache Cocktail”: one litter of saline with Toradol ( like Motrin), Zofran fir nausea, and 4mg Decadron (short acting steroid)
    Got home about 4:30, took antibiotic and more nausea and pain meds and managed to get headache down to a dull roar. It started with a little sinus pressure/ allergies over the weekend and hit full force with a migraine at 3:00 am. Took 1/4 a banana, Norco and Aleve (and Zantac to cover those). , puked it all up 15 min later and had 45 Min of dry heaves. Was out of Zofran sonused some oeepermint oil in my mouth fir nausea bMeant to call in to work, was waiting til 5 am to be polite nod not wake Boss Lady too soon, fell back asleep til 7;45-8:00 and felt marginally well enough to go to work. Called docs office for antibiotic Rx and they squeezed me in to see the PA or nurse practitioner (hadn’t seen her yet as I’ve only had 2visuts with my new primary, whim I adore). My BP was 160/90, so she write the Rx and then sent me to the infusion room for the “cocktail”. I was really hesitant about this primary at first because it is such a large conglomerate group if docs, but they’ve gir everything imaginable almost in this one big bldg. X-ray, sono, MRI, Infusion Room, etc etc for only 19% co insurance opposed to the 35% I was paying for my small practice primary doc when Obamacare and ACO”s kicked in. God works in mysterious ways if we can see past our grumble-bunny tendencies. LoL.

    At irate I was alone in huge infusion room which was nice bc if the migraine, the nurse turned out the lights. We chatted about out nursing pathways. She’s in her early 20″s and applying to RN programs, and wants to work ER or ICU. I also did IV’s as an LVN , in IR and went back to RN school at 28, and ended up working ER. She was a really pleasant nd kund girl. Just as my headache was straying to let up, an elderly couple can in- he was greeting blood work and IV antiobiotic for some wound infections in his legs. They’re in their 80″s , he came in wheelchair and stood with much help to transfer to recliner. Limping heavily on left leg. I didn’t ask really deep history but I’m guessing hip replacement, and leg wounds were fom a fall, ratched up his shins. Started up the conversation about his Waikiki Beach Tshirt he was wearing with his sweat pants. They’d been to Haawaii several times, my frothed wax stationed thee in the military. We ended up talking about dads, uncles and grat uncles, brothers and sisters in law in various military posts and services, bith peacetime snd wartime from WWI & II, Korea Vietnam Iraq, Germany Afghanisran, Hawaiid Florida, mostly Army and Navy but also Air Force Marines And Coast Guard. It was the coolest conversation. He told me he fought in World War One, but list to his wife! Lol. They went to the Baotist church in Irbing where two generation of my coworker Shirley’family have attended. We talked about list parents and loved ones, military and civilian, he kept shooting in a pun it two and I told him how much my dad lived that sort if thing. It passed the time do pleasantly for me even with a brutal headache, and when I stood to leave He looked like tree might be a tiny littlutke mini-tear glistening in the corner of hus eye, and thanked me fur asking about Waikiki. I told him thanks for the pleasant distraction in chatting and told him I would keep them in my prayers. The wife said thanks he really needs them and u touched her arm and said I suspected she needed them too. Sweet smiles from both made my day. Felt so good to be used as a limitless bit if an angel, ;ornery one with he horns holding up the halo-lol) and I was sonorous of you Sue, for your bravery in starting your “mini-group-therapy-flying-elephant-pizza-party” during yout rad treatment last week. I’m guessing my little party wasn’t quite as hilarious as yours but I felt so inspired and thankful today. That my dear lady, is the ripple effect or your gift to us.

    Well I’m eating a few bites of gluten-free RiceMac & Cheese (Amy’s Organics-yum!) as its all I could think of to land some more pills on that wouldn’t make me nauseous from the get-go. Ginger ale, washcloth and barf bucket standing by at bedside, just in case. Night meds and Norco/Zofran / Half-an-Ambien Migraine Bomb down the hatch, I’m going to sign off before I right something incoherentb or vembarassing (wait, I often do that without meds! Oh well) and would appreciate your prayers for waking up migraine free for work tomorrow. Love to all, Princess Crabby Pants (with the Bursting-Pumpkin-Head Stretching Her Tiara) 👑 Off to Dream Land…😴💤💤

      • So Proud of you Sue not sonorous. Too late for that not incoherent thing and this was mostly typed before meds. Ha ha. 😃

    • ANNIE….SWEETPEA……BOY YOU HAD QUITE A TIME OF IT HUH? I HOPE THAT YOU HAVE WOKEN UP TODAY MINUS THE MIGRAINE…….I GET THEM TOO, AND THEY CAN GO ON FOR 2/3 DAYS, AND I DON’T KNOW ABOUT YOU, BUT I ALWAYS FEEL REALLY COLD DURING THEM, NO MATTER IF ITS A HOT DAY, I JUST FEEL WASHED OUT AND CHILLED TO THE BONE…….I WISH YOU BETTER DARLING……LOVE YOU..JENNIE XX

  24. Can I just say how revolting it is to clean up puke, do a partial bed linen change and carry the trash out to an apartment dumpster while still dry heaving with a wretched migraine reignited by the same ???😝at least it’s not the other end…💩Always something to be thankful for. LoL
    Sorry to whine y’all. Poor pitiful me. Waah waah. Ok, got that out if my system. 🙊

    👑Princess Crabby Pants/ Angry Tummy

      • Thanks Janet. Not as bad at that initial post would visually make one think- I was typing without my glasses so all the typo’s- y’all please don’t worry that I’ve had a stroke or am exhibiting word salad sign of mental disorder (schizophrenia is their that does word salad? Too long ago from Abnormal Psych 101) I’m sure the steroid and pain meds today helped with all those typos too. I slept quite a long time yesterday afternoon so even though I’m not sleeping in long stretches this morning, my headache is mostly gone after the lasting I threw up and I think if i can slip in another 2 hour “nap” (before I have to actually get up get up 4 hours from now) I’ll be good to go for work.
        Sooo, short answer: yes I’m having a bit of a rough patch but not as bad as that last post with all the typo’s made it sound. Thanks a million for the healing prayers and positive energy. You’re always so sweet that way! Had to pee- back to napping. Hugs! 😴💤💤

    • HAPPY TO HEAR YOU ARE FEELING BETTER ANNIE. WOW WHAT A TIME YOU HAD. SENDING ANGELS YOUR WAY GIRL. YOU CERTAINLY NEED THEM AROUND YOU.
      YEP THAT TIME IS NEVER RIGHT FOR ME EITHER SO I’M NOT SURE WHAT TIME ZONE ???
      LOVE YOU BIG! XXX

      • JUST POSTED AND IT SAYS 2.49 P.M. AND IT’S 10:50 A.M. HERE ???
        LOVE TO ALL ON THIS BLOG WHERE EVER YOU MAY BE.
        XXX

  25. Morning all you peeps ! Annie, you need to slow it down girl !! 🙂
    Hope this finds you all up and about and doing FINE today. It is going to be another hot one here. It was 93 in the house when I got home yesterday afternoon and that was with the AC going !! Took it a bit to cool down, but I sat on the couch with the fan blowing on me. Was so tired as I woke up wide awake at 5 am !! THe heat ZAPS me ! Got me lots of fruit ( a big juicy watermelon ) and some Seltzer water. Sue that really does help keep you hydrated and the ole belly feeling better. I have been drinking it during the night and have seen quite a difference ! Love the little things we share that helps us out.
    Prayers for you all, here’s to another fine day. Gotta get ready to go out into the world. Ms Alice is taking me out to lunch today 🙂 This should be fun !
    Love to one and all
    Tonie

    • FUN INDEED TONIE, ENJOY YOUR LUNCH WITH MS ALICE.
      HOPE YOU ARE GETTING A BIT OF YOUR STRENGTH BACK SWEETIE PIE.
      LOVE YOU BIG! GOD BLESS. ENJOY THE DAY.

  26. HI….CHRIS CAN’T GET ON THE BLOG ONCE AGAIN, JUST THOUGHT I WOULD LET YOU KNOW, AND AT THE SAME TIME SEND LOVE AND HUGS TO EVERYONE…….MANAGED ANOTHER WALK THIS MORNING ROUND YET ANOTHER LAKE….GETTING GOOD AT THIS…PLEASE GOD THE OLD BODY HOLDS UP…..SUZANNE, I HOPE YOU ARE GETTING ON OK ON THOSE MEDS……WAS THINKING OF YOU WHEN I WAS LAKE WALKING THIS MORNING…….TONIE, YOU FEELING LESS TIRED?? SUE HOW IS IT GOING….WISHING AN EASIER TIME WITH EACH VISIT…..ANNIE HOW’S IT GOING? NOT FORGETTING JANET, TINKING OF YOU SWEETS…..SORRY THIS IS ALL JUMBLED UP, JUST A BIT TIRED, SO FORGIVNESS NEEDED…….WITH LOVE AND HAPPY THOUGHTS…..JENNIE XXXXXXX

  27. Trying again!
    May get on
    Daren’t post a long one
    And mite not get on again…it keeps saying WordPress error
    If no further post you know i can’t get on again
    Love to all
    Chris

  28. Hey Chris:
    You are here again ! Suzanne, hope you are doing better. Jennie, we all KNOW you are a bit jumbled up anywho ! 🙂
    Had a good lunch with Ms Alice. We went to a little place and had some awesome crabcakes. She had hers on a sandwich and I had mine with cole slaw, fries and hush puppies ! The fries were awesome and I shared em with Ms Alice. So crispy but not greasy. I hadn’t been downtown in Galax for probably 35-40 years ! All has changed so much. I remember going to the department store there and getting my majorette boots, cause no one else sold them. It is now an antique shop which will be closing after the Fiddler’s Convention this year. (wonderful Bluegrass Festival that draws people and talent from all over the US and the world.We even have some Irish fiddler’s) My brother and his wife and son are at my sister’s. Their granddaughter is being put into labor tonight for their first great grandchild. There was a country feast down there. Pinto beans, fried cabbage, fried salt pork meat,(fat back), mashed potatoes, corn bread, tomatoes, onions and cucumbers. ( I had a small piece of cornbread) 🙂 Never was much into that food and I am still full from lunch 🙂 Take care all. Sue I am praying you are resting and feeling better. My 5 days of prednisone put me back on top a bit. Don;’t feel as yuk as I did.
    Love you all
    Tonie

    • Gees Tonie, reading that country menu, oh man, that which does not kill us makes us strong or at least raises the cholesterol. So very southern. There’s barely a thing there I could hardly eat but that doesn’t mean it’s not somebody else’s fare de resistance. Wow, everything you mentioned in your lunch menu sounds so good. Crab cakes in VA. Who would have thunk? Hope all goes well with that new great grandbaby.
      Dear girl, I am so glad the short term prednisone lifted you up a bit. Sometimes we just push these poor bodies too far but life beckons. Hope the helpers who visit in the summer were helpful to you and Judy. It’s a good thing. Hope you’re both getting some projects accomplished. Stay well sweet lady. How’s the financial bit? Maybe it’s time to get a new lawyer. You paid for that disability…it’s yours. Love you much, Sue

      • Sue:
        I got a letter from the Congressman yesterday. Just sending me a copy of the SSI’s letter that they were sending on his inquiry about my case to the dept that has it. Told him it was pending.He told me he would be in touch again as soon as he had more answers. Took him two weeks to get that answer ! At least he is doing something.
        More kids coming to work with us on Monday and Tuesday. I have several things for them to help me with, so it will be a busy busy day. Tomorrow night at 7 I will be getting my rt shoulder MRI. Glad they schedule them later so it gives me the day free. So we will soon see if there is anything amiss in that shoulder. You take care. And yes, all that menu needed to be completely southern was some gravy !! (of course the drink was sweet tea and coffee!)
        Love you muchly !
        TOnie

    • TONIE….WHAT GOOD NEWS, ITS GOOD TO HEAR YOU ARE FEELING BETTER, AND YOU SEEM TO HAVE HAD A WONDERFUL TIME WITH MISS ALICE…..GREAT STUFF….LOVE YOU MATE…JENNIE POO XX

  29. Tonie, I found the brakes last night! LoL Isn’t it crazy how the same steroids that lifted you up to such a good level rocketed me right through the roof into Crazyville? Made me wonder if the dose wasn’t more than what I thought they were giving me or if its because they were IV- she told me they should only be in my system for 4hours! Yeah not so much- that was like 16 hours later and I still felt flushed and jittery all the way through til this morning (36 hours later!) I reread the long entry I made that had all the typos and just shook my head… No more typing without glasses, and I’m banishing myself from the blog next time I get a dose of steroids! Maybe I should do some “manic” spring cleaning instead? Only problem is the burst of energy is usually not focused clearly enough to be productive, and if I’m sick enough to need steroids I should be taking it easy anyway.

    Jennie- good for you walking around the lake! Keep at it. I need to do more of that but it’s so darn hot and humid here. Not to mention the antibiotics I’m on make you ultra sensitive to sunlight. Hoping for a rainy cooling off spell soon.

    Suzanne, how’s it going with the Lyrica or is it a bit too soon to tell?

    Hi Chris- must be so frustrating to never know if you’re getting on here or not. How are you? and your Dad and DH?
    Any fun outings recently- they always sound so interesting.

    I don’t think I’m going to be able to go to Canada for my 20yr nursing school reunion. Plane tickets and passport renewal cost too much. So instead I’m asking my prn nurse to flip days with me so I get a couple long weekends off beside July 4th, to go see my favorite niece Brandy in Austin and maybe some old friends in Abilene. Both trips are only about 4 hours from Dallas so pretty manageable with a meal stop & walkabout midway.

    Sue, I hope your week has gotten better for you emotionally and you’re getting through your treatments ok. You sounded so discouraged the other night… So while I was bouncing off the walls I bounced a few prayers up for you. Good thing God understands “gibberish!”

    Lyn, how’re the kitties? Too bad they can’t take a ride in your new little cruiser with the top down! Bet Rufus would like it.

    Well, nighty-nite time for me. Day off tomorrow but 2 doctor appts + PT so not really a “play day.”

    Love to all, Princess Crabby Pants

  30. HI PRINCESS, HOPE THE DOC APPTS AND PT GO WELL FOR YOU. HAPPY YOU ARE FEELING A BIT BETTER. I’M SURE AFTER ALL YOU ARE DOING TODAY YOU WILL NEED A NAP.

    IT’S STILL EARLY TO TELL BUT YESTERDAY I WAS ACTUALLY ABLE TO BRING MOLLY FOR 3 SHORT WALKS, HAVEN’T BEEN ABLE TO DO THAT IN A FEW MONTHS. I AM SWOLLEN WHEN I GET UP IN THE MORNING, NOT SURE IF THAT IS FROM THIS NEW PILL OR SOMETHING ELSE GOING ON. HAPPY TO BE ABLE TO WALK….. YEAH BABY, FEELS SO GOOD. I WALK IN THE WOODS NOT LUCKY ENOUGH TO HAVE A LAKE LIKE JENNIE POO., BUT STILL THRILLED.

    TONIE THAT LUNCH SOUNDS DELICIOUS. YOU KNOW I’VE NEVER HAD HUSH PUPPIES. MY DH DID WHEN HE WENT ON A CONFERENCE IN NORTH CAROLINA. YOU KEEP PACING YOURSELF TONIE.

    CHRIS HOPE YOU CAN GET ON TODAY.

    SUE IT’S ALMOST T.G.I.F. – YOU CAN DO IT GIRL. WILL BE FINDING OUT ABOUT MY SISTER TODAY. WILL LET YOU ALL KNOW WHAT IS HAPPENING WITH CAROL.
    LOVE TO ALL ON THIS BLOG.
    GOD BLESS AND HAVE A GOOD DAY WITH LITTLE PAIN.
    XXX

  31. SUE,,,,THINKING OF YOU AS ALWAYS…….SOON BE THE WEEKEND AND YOU CAN REST UP AND SEE THE FAMILY AND JAKE AGAIN……PRAYERS FOR YOU DEAR LADY…..I LOVE YOU…JEN X

  32. HAD A GOOD DAY, LUNCH WITH FRIENDS, BUT ONE GLASS OF WINE AND I HAVE A HEADACHE…….SO NO WALKING TODAY, SORRY MY POSTS ARE SO SHORT, THATS WHY……………..LOVE TO ALL….JENNIE XX

  33. Hi folks
    Hope I get on this time
    Been very busy and a lot to tell but very tired and have a busy w.end coming up
    Hope all ok
    I can catch up with whats happening but can’t always get to post
    Chrisx

    • No worries Chris. Even if you can’t write lengthy notes to catch up its just good to have you chime in for a quick Hi and know that you’re OK. HOPE YOUR WEEKEND IS AWESOME. ❤

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