WHEN YOUR LIFE ROLLS OVER ON YOU

ship in storm

 

Here in the beautiful Northwest, we have the very helpful presence of the U.S. Coast Guard. At the mouth of the Columbia River the freshwaters of the river can become quite violent when they are met by the salt waters of the Pacific Ocean. Driven by winds and rain, the channel can be torrential in its violence and sadly, each year many boats end up in trouble. Capsized or floundering in dangerous water is, I’m certain, a most frightening experience. Each year lives are lost, usually due to a lack of knowledge of these waters and their risk. When the waters are particularly violent, the Coast Guard has a line of ships which have the capability to roll over and right themselves. If your small sailboat has been tossed and turned and you end up in the water alone or with someone you care about, thrashing around for your life, it must be a great comfort to know there is a ship or a cutter that can come to your rescue in such a dramatic fashion.

If they can design and build a ship with those capabilities, then we, as human beings must have the same capability, don’t you think? For many of us, our lives have been turned upside down, we’ve been tossed about and we end up in a totally different place then we intended to be. We’ve been rolled over, tumbled and left to flounder.

HOW DO YOU GET RIGHT SIDE UP AGAIN?

Many of us have found ourselves lying on the couch after moving from the bed and that was “it” for the day. Many of us live that way for years, not just days. Each of us have to find our own way in “righting” ourselves to get back on our feet and back on the road of life. We can seek help from the “rescue ships” and sometimes from above, in the form of a “helicopter” but the bottom line for our rescue is it has to be “an inside job.”

It takes profound courage. It takes faith in the future and hope for a brighter tomorrow, as well as sniffing out just the right doctors who can offer us assurance, medical knowledge and the right tools to get back up again. Sometimes we rely on faith in a power stronger than ourselves; at other times family and often, our built-in responsibilities because we don’t want to “let down” those we love. Being needed on a daily basis can be a very good thing. Life has a way of dragging us on, forward and upward; all we have to do is hang on. Eventually, we do find dry land.

HAVE YOU EVER HAD THE HOUSE FALL ON TOP OF YOU?

Do you ever feel like the wicked witch from the WIZARD OF OZ? Oh, come on. I’m sure you have at one time or other felt like all that was left of you were two legs in striped stockings, sticking out from a house that has fallen on you. No? Then you are very fortunate.

I know this may sound strange, but there is something profoundly empowering about being on your last leg, down to your last straw and yes, having the house fall down on top of you. My goodness, so much violence with boats turning over; houses falling on top of us and many other analogies that may come to mind but life can really suck sometimes. Life is not for the feint hearted. Those are the times you indeed need to tie a knot in the end of your rope and hang on. You hang on for your life, for the lives of those who love you and for the life you have yet to live. It’s not completed you know, just because you have received a diagnosis of a painful disease you have to live with. It’s not over when your life is upturned, disrupted or maimed. How much life does it take to be alive? How much air does it take for one breath? How much water does it take to get wet? Hold on, hold on.

WHEN IS ENOUGH, ENOUGH?

This is a question that often arises among all of us who lead this lifestyle when we’ve suffered enough; experienced enough fatigue and look heavenward and shout, “Enough already!”

It’s a shame this isn’t a video because that last idea should be animated, with arms flailing in the air and uttered with an extremely hostile growl from deep within. We could jump in the air, lift furniture and toss it and put a fist through the wall but, that all takes too much effort and most importantly, it would hurt those parts of us which already hurt. Too bad though, that all sounds insanely therapeutic.

After almost 30 years of living with pain I can’t even count all the times I’ve uttered that phrase, enough already. To whom am I speaking? Well, it varies, so let’s see; there’s God, the Force, the wall, myself, all my dead relatives, half of my living relatives and often, the dogs. It’s okay because I don’t think the dogs are speaking back to me, but some of the others, well, maybe.

I spent, wasted and supposedly learned a great deal during the gnashing of the first few years I was ill. I couldn’t believe what my body was experiencing. Just the dire thought of living this way for the rest of my life was truly enough. I felt cheated, betrayed and deeply depressed. Unlike some people, I didn’t ever think it was a kind of punishment for anything I had done. I just don’t think that way. I always believed there were answers for me out there, somewhere, as well as a multi-changing purpose. I also never thought of doing away with myself for more than 30 seconds because of my faith and because of my love for my family. I’ve decided it takes far more courage to live than to die.

We all know there are two kinds of misery: physical and mental and both are usually accompanied by deep fatigue. That fatigue can pull you down and roll you around. It can zap life of all joy, make your daily needs impossible to fulfill and cause your behavior to be so bad you don’t even want to be in the same room with yourself.

We’re only human and can strike out in our frustration to those around us. Is this fair, of course not, but like a wet dog shaking off his moisture we often shake our aggravation just to be rid of it. This is unproductive but we don’t really care at the time we’re all wet. This act only isolates us further, but again, we don’t care. That’s when it is time to go back to the doctor, find a new doctor or if that fails to give you answers, it may be time to seek counseling. This life with chronic pain steals life, joy and productivity from us.

We’re in a battle for our lives and we have to win. With the help of a wonderful PCP, I have always found a tiny door to open on that infamous wall. It’s vital that we do not give up the search. It’s tempting, I know, but there are answers. It may be a different type of medicine. It may be physical therapy consultation. It may be a change of diet. Keep searching because there is no reverse in life, only forward. Maybe we can’t be who we were but we can be someone new. There is always intrinsic healing within us. There are times we may need help to find it. The train has already left the station and you and I are already onboard. Don’t we want the destination to be as joyful, fruitful and as pain free as possible? That may require us to think in new ways and discover new pathways.

There are certain qualities which I have found helpful when I feel myself drowning in the depths of “enough.” Although I believe we each have very individual answers to find in this search, some of these solutions are universal. Just a few of these are a deep sense of purpose within ourselves that tells us we have something to do, a talent we know we possess and need to use, or someone who needs us in their lives. For those we love we often climb stairs, hang in there with a job and let life pull us along even if it does hurt our hands, our knees or in my case, my sitter as well. A purposeless life isn’t really living, is it?

A GOOD SENSE OF HUMOR WILL GET YOU THROUGH THE ROUGHEST DAYS

I believe each of us comes to a point in physical suffering when we feel we cannot go on any longer; but we do. We fall asleep, or just fall down; we swallow a pill, cry until we’re dry or many other ways of coping. When we hit that wall, it’s very personal. Everyone copes differently but the ones who use humor are the survivors. I’ve seen grown adults with a broken toe who think it’s the end of the world and others who were in traction after a devastating accident and strung up like laundry on a clothesline in dire pain still manage a laugh or two.

If you’ve ever been hospitalized it is the workers and medical personnel who made you smile who still live on in your memory. Individuals who can make you laugh are pure sunshine in the form of caring and loving humans. Often they take a different form that isn’t human. Any of us who live with pets know this is true. Their antics bring buckets of joy to a dry heart.

If you haven’t read the writings of the late Norman Cousins, you should. He writes about the therapeutic use of humor with chronic pain. He made quite a study of the healing effects of laughter on chronic illness.

Look for joy while you are seeking the best medical care possible. Open those closed curtains or shade, throw a ball for the dog or go outside and pick a flower from that plant you forgot to water. Enough is enough in our limited view but life still goes on and instead of being a dead end, it is just a layover or perhaps a detour while we see another way to go. It is said the Chinese symbol for misfortune is the same symbol as the one for opportunity. I hope it’s true because it’s such a lovely, healthy thought.

I would like to challenge you, my friends, to wait until your boat rolls over; take a deep breath, hang on and it will right itself.  In many of the old movies they used to portray dream sequences by showing a series of doors opening. You would walk through one door to find another and another. In many ways that is our life with chronic pain. Closed doors do open; there is always another door to go through.  This experience is a conversion of sorts. Can you find it in your heart and spirit to embrace the new you? I understand so fully what I’m asking but I also know it is the only way out.

234 thoughts on “WHEN YOUR LIFE ROLLS OVER ON YOU

  1. Tonie encouraging words..thank you . Sometimes tho I’m soo close to saying a home! I don’t know uitilmately which would be better..but if there is only a short time left…well it’s best he stays at home..but who knows .if he eventually needs a feeding tube I don’t know then.
    dH parents..well his mum died when he was 10 ,very sad as there were 4 children who were sent to different friends to be looked after, they were split up.and his dad died about 1972
    He still emails his sister..and they came over about 5yrs ago.after that some nephews and nieces came
    His brothers well it’s Xmas cards sent etc
    Sue
    Oh dear what a place to have the abcess..I hope it feels easier by now
    How’s the weather with you. It’s dull here but nice and cool but rainy
    Are you feeling a bit better ,life is soo busy for you and distressing with it.will you go a bit easier do you think with pt ,can you ask her?
    Jen
    Hope the day without the tabs goes well..
    Love Chris

    • Chris, interesting share about DH’s family. Sounds like a rough childhood. It’s amazing how such fine people can come from some hard times. Maybe it’s the lack of spoiling and those very hard times that do it.
      I know you’re in a rough spot with your Dad. I would feel as you and he do but there is always the safety factor to consider. I know that is also yours. Let’s see how it works out. I hope to have a better week but have my doubts but am excited about getting the tiles in although it will inconvenience us for a few days.
      Our weather is nice right now with an occasional rain shower. Supposed to get hot for a day or two next week so guess we will see. Well, I should try to get the groceries out of the car. Always rest a bit in between getting home and hauling in. Jim had to go to work for awhile. No rest for the wicked or those who care for them at the jail. Love, Sue

      • Sue
        Do be so careful using the basement steps ..don’t let your little dog pull you …or carry any shopping. And that waiting again for the license….
        Thinking of you this week ..and oh to think of you singing and crying in the car….oh dear Sue..I’ve done that to..its like a bravado to see you thru….you are such a strong one. You will get thru this and see to getting your back sorted,I know..wish I could be there as we all do to lighten that load for you..but prayers being said and I’m sure by all of us . I’m so sorry for you too that you didn’t enjoy the time out for dinner…..you deserved to
        I wish I could sprinkle some fairy dust …..and some blow back on me too!
        Going to make a cup if tea ..nice cool night for sleeping ..been raining all day
        Love chris

  2. Chris, so sorry for all you’re dealing with. Dad is up to his shenanigans again… but as observed above, you are doing the right thing, so hang in there!

    Jennie, sorry it’s cold there… we could ship over some heat from here! (If only.)

    Sue, my heavens what a week you and Jim have been through. Do speak with your PT. I’m sure your routine can be adjusted. 9 hours in the ER?!!! That is unreal. How awful. Poor DD texted me a couple of times from work yesterday. She had an awful day – mostly people who SHOULD have gone to the ER but came to her Urgent Care instead! One literally almost died. Tons of people coming in, too. Poor kid came home last evening and crashed. Up and out again today, though not thrilled about it. She was stopping for a coffee on the way to kick start her morning. 😉

    Sorry I’ve been away, folks. As Tonie mentioned, it was a full week here with rehearsals and concert performing the Mozart Requiem. The rehearsal/concert venue is about an hour and a half away from here and we always commute. DH, DD and I all sang and of course traveled together, so I only had to drive one night. Tiring, kicked my butt in that way, but as always, worth it. I do enjoy singing and listening to that work, although I prefer singing it in a larger group when with an orchestra!! We are a small chamber sized group of professional singers – usually 32 voices – against a full orchestra, although they did cut back a bit for this one. Usually we are in front of the orchestra and to the side or sides, which is helpful. This guest conductor wanted us in the traditional position behind the orchestra. No problem IF we had been 2 or 3 times the number of voices! A LOT of energy was expended! Since the concert I’ve been trying to catch up and running various errands. I’ve got some plants to plant today, and another concert tonight, although little for me to do in this one. I am soloist with a concert band (I used to play also, but don’t wish to trust my hands to fully cooperate any more) so singing only one song and will help cover bell parts as needed. Wish me luck sight reading the bell parts! Haven’t played bells is several years… Tomorrow I hope to find some time to start a couple of small, fun projects painting, distressing and waxing a small foot stool and a cute dining room chair for use as outdoor décor. Maybe the start of a new hobby? We’ll see. I suppose I should grab a bite of breakfast and see about getting out to those plants. Picked them up from my relative’s Plant Farm yesterday. 🙂 Take care, all!

    • Lyn
      Busy girl! Your music sounds as if it’s magic
      How did your vocal chords behave,must be fine now ..you did have some trouble with them
      Enjoy the furniture painting I like that sort of decor too
      Chris

    • Lyn dear, it is good to hear from you. I can only imagine the amount of extra thrust it took to sing from behind an orchestra. Good luck with the bells. That sounds like such fun. I do wish you luck. What a lot of traveling for Mozart but sounds like it was so well worth the pain and fatigue. At least the three of you had some time together for that trip. As our kids age all of those times are more precious. Once they have their own children, there is little time left for us and that’s as it must be…life.
      Yes we indeed had a crappy week. This week will be busy and bustling but hope not as hard on my back and backside. One day at a time has never had more meaning for me. Don’t think the PT is going to help the back but it has definitely helped my shoulder where I lost the breast. I have such good movement in it now. I didn’t think it was possible to stretch such tightness but it has been good. It’s also helped my balance.
      Love your furniture projects and am so in favor of any creative activity. The other day GD and I were playing with cloud clay and I started making flowers. It was and is great fun. It was kind of like a couple of years ago when I decided to do a watercolor of Beth’s wedding bouquet. I have never done watercolored painting in my life. It turned out looking like a pepperoni pizza but she still likes it. We need the creative bright spots in order to survive a pain filled life. Later dear. Love you, Sue

  3. Jennie, it’s difficult to say. I know there is a certain amount of pain in PT, always is but the week I had didn’t help much. I tried going out to dinner last night with the family but it was bad. The booth at the Chinese restaurant was straight up and down and very uncomfortable. Jim even got my cushion but it didn’t help and I couldn’t eat. I tried. I think it’s time for another opinion on my back pain. It’s worse than the sacroiliac pain and it’s making me so isolated it isn’t fair to Jim or me.
    I went to the store this morning, early to get it over with. My early isn’t another persons early but early for me. Getting out, however abominable, always helps with depression. It’s a lovely day here but very crowded with Sunday market visitors.
    So pleased to hear Tim sold his house. It sounds like he did a wonderful job. Is he going to do the same in Cornwall with Claire…using his talents for construction? I know you’re proud of him. Do take care dear friend. Love you, Sue

  4. Tonie, the color of the new tiles we’re using around the stairs is called Copper. It’s very natural looking and a bit luminous in the sun. I choose a lighter grout. Hope it matches the retaining wall pain; if not we’ll have the wall repainted. The tile is slate and sort of varied in color.
    Sounds like the kids had a great if adventurous time on the horses. So happy for Nathan and know Devie will get back on again…you’ll see to that. Now as far as your new friend. I’m not worried about him being a serial killer. I’m more worried about him being a liar. Also, chemistry between a man and a woman is peculiar and requires some face time. I want you to have a partner in life and will keep you in my thoughts and mind. What will be will be.
    Went to the store a few mins. ago and had to push myself. Sang on the way home to keep perked up. Then I started singing His Eye is On the Sparrow and cried the rest of the way home. That song does that to me right now. My rheumy told me about a spinal clinic at the university in Portland and I’m going to look into it. I need another opinion or two to get rid of this back pain. Pray for me please. Have to get my license renewed this week and the waiting will be hard. Also hope to find my birth certificate or get the one I sent for in time. Oh I do get tired of life being such a challenge, don’t you? I know you do. Love you, Sue

    • Dear Sue:
      Nothing pushed upon me. I have set the ground rules and that is where it stays. GOTTA be face time. Yeah, I have thought of the liar angle as well. They are out there. In droves. I will always be in my comfort zone. No matter what.
      I am praying for you daily my friend. I love that song also, makes me blubbler as well. IT is just a great comfort song, knowing how much He loves us. I pray that you find something to help. Look into it all. There has to be something out there.
      I go for my last in the series of injections on my back this morning. I know eventually I am going to have to do something there. The Dr is telling me of an option to fusing. WHich I don’t want to do. But of course, my insurance doesn’t cover it. But time will tell. Back’s are really awful aren’t they ? They control all of our movements, and if one little thing is off, the whole shabang is !!
      Love you my friend.
      Tonie

  5. Tonie
    I too was concerned ,like sue…but couldn’t put it into words.do be careful..we just worry for you and that all will be ok….love Chris

  6. Chris, thanks for your thoughts and concern. I will be careful with those steep stairs. I think we could all use some magic fairy dust with healing powers. What a lovely thought. Love you, Sue

  7. I go along with everything Sue and Chris are thinking Tonie….please be careful, and don’t allow yourself to be talked into anything that doesn’t feel right……love you, Jennie xx

  8. Good morning all:
    Quick post, I must get ready and leave for the Dr’s in Roanoke. My last injection on the back. I too will soon have to look for another way to help it. THe shots don’t last long. My thoughts and prayers are with you all this am. I thank you for your concerns, I knew they were there. I will be safe and do nothing foolish.
    Love
    Tonie

  9. HELLO……TONIE, GOOD LUCK WITH THE INJECTION, I HOPE IT HELPS…..I KNOW IT SOUNDS LIKE ALL WE ARE DOING IS WARNING YOU OFF GETTING INVOLVED WITH THIS GUY, BUT ITS ONLY BECAUSE YOU ARE SO LOVED BY US ALL AND WE WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY BUT ALSO SAFE……….LOVE JENNIE XX

    SUE…..I AGREE, YOUR BACK NEEDS TO BE REVIEWED, AND MAYBE ANOTHER FORM OF TREATMENT FOR YOU, I KNOW THERE IS ALWAYS SOMEONE WATCHING OVER YOU, BUT RIGHT NOW WITH ALL THAT’S GOING ON, THINK I WILL RECOMMEND A PAIR OF STRONGER GLASSES……..SERIOUSLY THOUGH, I CAN TELL HOW ALL THIS IS GETTING YOU DOWN, ITS SO TOUGH WHEN YOU CAN’T EVEN ENJOY A MEAL OUT WITH YOUR FAMILY, FOR THE PAIN…….WISHING YOU LESS PAIN AND MUCH INNER STRENGTH MY FRIEND……………….LOVE JEN X

    CHRIS……HOW ARE THINGS LOVE? I KNOW YOU ARE HAVING TO DEAL WITH SUCH A LOT, AND THAT IT IS WEARING YOU DOWN…..ALWAYS THERE FOR A CHAT, AND HOPE THINGS STAY CALM FOR A LITTLE WHILE, ARE THE REST OF THE FAMILY OK? DID THE PASSPORT BUSINESS GET SORTED OUT?…….TAKE CARE, AND ALSO KEEP WARM, ITS COLD HERE, SO I GUESS ITS SIMILAR FOR YOU…….LOVE JENXX

    LYN…….I HOPE YOU ARE FEELING BETTER, SOUNDS LIKE YOU ARE VERY BUSY WITH YOUR SINGING, AND YES OF COURSE…..LUCK…..FOR YOUR WITH READING THE BELL PARTS, BUT I AM SURE YOU WON’T NEED IT…..LOVE JENNIE X

    • Jennie dear, Yes, I will keep looking for new answers. Yesterday I had a strange day. I had to go for an ultrasound in the morning because I’ve had a little growth come up on my abdomen. It’s like a small golf ball and the oncologist needed to know what it is. Not sure what we’ll do about it if anything. Probably just watch it for now, however we did discover I have gallstones. Whoopee…another problem. They’re small so will probably try to live with them. Then I had PT in the afternoon and was still not feeling well so had a calm session…not too much. I came home, laid down to rest and about ten mins later this tremendous noise startled me, and of course poor George. It sounded like a car had hit the house. A glass display case that’s been up on the wall at the top of the indoor stairs fell off the wall shattering everywhere and throwing glass down the stairs, knocking pictures off the wall and spilling and breaking some of the contents of the case. It had come apart from the back…the part that held it on the wall. What a shock. I had to first of all put George in his kennel and then find shoes for me. I called my DD and she and the grands came right over and helped me clean and vacuum it up. I thought the window up there had blown in but alas, not that. Life has just been crazy.
      I hope your friend who was hospitalized is better and his dear wife. Are you better now that you don’t have to travel so much? Hope your weather warmed up just a bit but not too much. We’re supposed to have heat today. Already been out to water plants. Love you, Sue

      • SUE….BLOOMING HECK…..THAT MUST HAVE SCARED THE LIVING DAYLIGHTS OUT OF YOU….AND THE MESS I CAN PICTURE, THANK GOODNESS BETH WAS AROUND TO COME AND HELP.
        YOU COULD HAVE DONE WITHOUT THIS LUMP MY FRIEND, COULD IT BE A HERNIA? JUST A THOUGHT…..I AM GLAD TO HEAR THE PT SESSION WAS A CALM ONE THIS TIME, IT SHOULD MAYBE STAY THAT WAY TILL YOU KNOW WHAT IS GOING ON WITH THE LUMP……YOU WILL TELL US IF THE DOC NEEDS TO DO ANYTHING WON’T YOU?
        YES OUR FRIENDS WERE OVER YESTERDAY, HE HAS LOST A STONE IN WEIGHT….HE NEEDED TO…..SHE HAS LOST FIVE POUNDS SO FAR, AND AS A RECENTLY DIAGNOSED DIABETIC, SHE NEEDED TO AS WELL.
        I MADE MY MIND UP NOT TO GO TO THE DOCTOR BEFORE HIS VACATION, I HAVEN’T TAKEN THE MEDS FOR FOUR DAYS NOW, AND I AM OK IN THAT AREA, BUT HAVE PLENTY OF MEDS PUT BY IN CASE.
        WELL MY FRIEND…..PLEASE TAKE GOOD CARE TO REST ALL YOU CAN…….LOVE YOU …JEN XX

  10. Morning all:
    Jennie, no I understand what you are saying. Trust me, I am proceeding carefully. We have hit it off on line and on the phone, doesn’t mean we will in person…..if we ever get to that part 🙂
    GOt my shot yesterday. Not sure what the next steps are, cause the pain was already getting pretty bad from the last shot wearing off. So the 7th I go for a follow up to see where we go from here. At least it got it all settled down in there a bit
    Helped my sister take up all her Iris “taters” yesterday and Red Hot Pokers. SO now I have a ton of flowers to plant. Don’t want to winter them, just stick them in all my various flower beds around and let them grow. Might make one at the mailboxes as well. Another project, like I need more 🙂
    Praying for each and everyone this morning. Hoping you have a wonderful day. Me , I am off to be with Ms Alice. Carol said she was full of herself yesterday. SO hopefully she will be up and at em again today.
    Love to you all
    Tonie

    • Tonie, Hope this injection lasts a long time. All any of us can do is take it one step at a time and pray for answers. Your flowers will be wonderful in the spring but I can see why you need to be cautious with your back right now. Hope you’re hanging in with the grands. I know you’re exhausted and hope that’s letting up a bit. Please read my entry to Jennie to get the latest on me. Love you..Sue

      • Thanks Sue:
        I try to be good to my back, yet so much has to be done that involves using it lol. It is the old “damned if you do and damned if you don’t ” Ya know.
        Love you
        Tonie

    • TONIE…..GLAD TO HEAR OF YOUR SLOW PROCEDURE WITH REGARDS TO YOUR FRIEND…IT PAYS TO BE CAUTIOUS. WELL IT SOUNDS LIKE THE SHOTS DON’T LAST TOO LONG, AND I WONDER WHAT THE 7TH WILL BRING? YOUR FLOWER BEDS WILL LOOK TERRIFIC, WITH THE RED HOT POKERS ETC…..AND WILL MAKE A NICE DISPLAY OF COLOUR. HAVE A GOOD DAY WITH MISS ALICE, NICE TO HEAR SHE STILL HAS A TONGUE ON HER………LOVE YOU…JENNIE XX

  11. Sue
    How long have you known about this lump.you must have and still be concerned..when will you know anything.please please let it be ok..and to have gall stones as well…that must be why you have Been feeling so nauseated . Maybe that’s been giving you some back pain
    And the glass case..that must have been horrendous ,what a noiseit must have made.and a mess too.did it damage the walls and was the china expensive . But thank goodness no one was under it..it could have fallen on you or George ,or even the grands the other day
    It wasn’t just a strange day more of a shit of a day
    How are you feeling now.,it must feel like no control over anything . Prayers that all will be good
    Love chrisx

    • Chris, Yes, I’ve had the nodule for a couple of months, maybe three or four. I got one on my collar bone after radiation therapy and the doctor has been measuring it and it hasn’t changed so it might be like that…just a fatty tumor. I haven’t been terribly worried about it because it is just under the skin. Radiation therapy seemed to change everything. I was shocked by the gallstones and don’t think it’s why I’ve been nauseous because most of my nausea except for the chemo drug related, was in the morning when my esophagus is so dry from the radiation burns. I choke, I cough and I drink fluids like mad. Started the new chemo drug on Sunday and will take it every other day for now. I know, I know. It’s just so much to take in.
      The glass case was a shocker. I didn’t have any China in it just some collectibles but most of them fared better than the case did. Jim collects model cars from the Franklin Mint, etc. They fared with a couple of things broken and a few other things. A couple of the nice picture frames hanging in the stairway were scratched and knocked down. The glass everywhere was the worse part. There is just something about the sound of shattering glass.
      How are things with you. I assume your Dad is still in the hospital and hope you’re at the coast. How is it all going? Love, Sue

  12. Dear Friends, no new blog this week. My editor/friend is in London so we’ll post it next week. Thanks, Sue

  13. Oh I see..that’s sounds much better..well fingers crossed for the new meds
    I suppose it’s another restriction to your diet now with the gallstones
    I had a large one and gall bladder out some years ago but it was a low fat diet for a while.
    Perhaps tho they may not bother you at all….just there and doing nowt
    My dad still in hospital and waiting for the care package for home..he’s getting irate with them..they won’t be keeping him longer than they can!
    We are still at home I had appt with resp clinic today and had a nitric oxide test no inflammation in the airways they say…?So what it is they say is a mixture of reflux and that I can’t take tablets for it and sjogrens ,my stupid breathing is because I try and protect smells with altering my breathing and it all goes wonky. Can’t get enough breath yawning .deep breaths and out of breath..I wake up gasping for air and dreaming .
    So I’m doing these exercises for it and see how it goes
    Tomorrow it is the hygienist at the dentist for us both,then Friday the dentist herself
    DH bp is down a bit on increased meds..have to see how that goes..best to be at home with all this going on
    Life is so vulnerable
    Love Chris

    • Chris, This is a hard way of life isn’t it. SO many of us and to add respiratory distress to it and enough to awaken you, that must be scary. As a fellow Sjogren’s sufferer I empathize so much. Sounds like the dental visits will not be as stressful praying all is okay with both of you. Glad DH’s B/P is doing better. I’m sure your Dad is giving them a bad time at the hospital out of frustration and the desire to be home on his own turf. Thoughts for each of you, Sue

    • CHRIS……GOOD LUCK WITH THE BREATHING EXERCISES LOVE, AND ALSO AT THE DENTIST, ARE YOU HAVING WORK DONE, OR JUST A CHECK UP? YES I AGREE, LIFE IS INDEED VULNERABLE, GOT UP THIS MORNING, AND MY KNEES GAVE WAY, O/A FINALLY GOT ME IN THE ONLY PLACE LEFT I HADN’T GOT IT IN….SOMETIMES LIFE SUCKS………………..HOWEVER, ONWARDS AND UPWARDS, I COULD CHEERFULLY STRANGLE THE JERK WHO CAME UP WITH THAT ONE…….LOVE YOU…JEN X

      • Good morning peeps
        Sue so sorry to hear of yet another health issue for you this is not what you need right now. I pray God gives answers and healing. I feel so out of touch with you all. My life is so hectic at this moment I have enjoyed the kids but not enough down time
        Chris thought of you last night my friends were over helping me with a project Carol was telling us about her grandfather when she took care of him He was a handful when I knew him years ago. But the things she was telling us. I laughed so hard !! There will come day when you will do the same.
        Ms Alice is seeing her people again. She has a lady with no arms and legs that sits in the couch with her. I think it is the pillow lol
        Well prayers for all a good day
        Love you all
        Tonie

  14. Tonie
    No arms no legs! Poor lady….you can just pick her up and move her! But how is she……does she manage her life for herself? It must be such a trial for her ,was she born like this?
    Well been to have teeth cleaned all good,now the dentist Friday….
    My dad..tonie .at the moment he’s dictating stuff for me to do from the hosp.with his banking books.( I took them for he was giving money away) he wants me doing this and that with them…I said when I’m next In town I will.but it doesn’t need doing…he just wants to be in charge…..so I’m not doing it till I have to for him. otherwise it will be every day..on top of other stuff
    Laugh about it…huh ! Maybe!
    Well I hope life calms down for you soon and back to normal….
    Sue
    Will you have to put something now in the cupboards place?
    Jen
    How’s you today
    DH not too good on new tabs have to see if side effects wear away..wasnt very good after lying down at dentists
    Weather not to bad ,nice and cool rained a lot yesterday .but I got some gardening in today.nxt week it says we are going to get some of the weather Florida is having now…not as nice a summer as last year
    Ok gonna read my book now
    Oh Jen. Your weather seems hot there right now according to the forecast ?
    Chris

    • Chris…..you kidding me??? had the fire on all day, and Winter slippers, but its going to start climbing again up to the high twenties, just got to get tomorrow done with.
      Sorry to hear your DH had problems after seeing the dentist….bummer!! its bad enough having to go in the first place.Still off the meds, apart from the o/a ones, holding my breath though…….glad you held on to Dad’s bank books, there some wicked people about, always on the watch……..take care of yourself love,……..Jen xx

    • Chris:
      Sweetie, there is no lady with no arms and legs. She just sees these people; black man wearing feathers, red haired lady with big hair. A man outside jumping up and down on a trampoline. She listens to books all the time, and I told her it is the characters in the book. She has macular degeneration. I bet your dad is loosing it cause he is loosing control. You will have to give him an allowance to keep so he feels he still has his ,money. Take care of you !
      Love
      Tonie

      • Tonie
        Gullible me!i thought you were being a bit funny about her! You must have amusing days with Ms Alice.i was wondering where she came from!!
        And yep my dad has a lot of money even on him at the Hospital.the nurses gave it back to me one time when they found it.then a few days after he wanted it back again.so only gave some of it
        He has it hidden in a drawer there! Each time I go in I count it. . As he leaves coins all over the top , about £10 of it scattered . He can’t put it away I suppose and has it out for a newspaper etc.but he has a lot in a wallet in the drawer and won’t let me take it away.
        At home it’s gonna be a problem as well as he leaves money around to test if people steal it from him.although he can’t move now from his bed so that’ll be difficult for him….but he also thinks people take his money. So it’s all fun!
        A cleaner did steal something from him when he first moved into this sheltered place .some of his miniature medals that he wore for evening dress and some other stuff as well…..so he feels vulnerable I suppose and sets these traps.
        So yep he will have money on him probably too much tho,but as you say it will make him feel better
        Love Chris

    • Chris…..was that message about the weather for me??? A bit better here today, actually had tea in the garden, but then the clouds come along and its blooming cold…….you are having a time of it with your Dad and his money aren’t you…..its a problem, but I think you are right, leave enough for his daily needs, and keep the rest at home till he comes out of hospital, then take it from there…..hope you are feeling ok, and that your DH is feeling better too…love Jen xx

      • Jennie, sorry you’re having so much cold weather. How do the plants like it? The only good thing is you and DH don’t have to water as much. We’re warm for us. You’re sounding a bit better. Keeping up with you on FB and here. Love, Sue

  15. Morning all:
    Quick hello as I have overslept this morning and must get on with it !
    I was so exhausted last night, work all day came right in and baked cookies for church game night. Back home at 9. I think I went right to sleep. Tomorrow, Carol and her hubby and I are camping with the kids. Just going out on their property and sleeping on the hay wagon . (oh joy, my body is gonna love me ) But should be fun for them. Having loads of cucumbers from the garden. I don’ t make pickles so just eat em and give em away.
    Chris, your Dad sounds like such a character. I bet he was a lot of fun in days past. Just do the best you can mamacita !!
    Sue praying for you my friend.
    Take care all.
    Love
    Tonie

    • Tonie, the sleeping in the hay wagon sounds like a great idea for the kids but for you? I know they will thoroughly enjoy it. Carol and her hubby are such good friends. Their life sounds so interesting.
      I appreciate your thoughts and prayers. Frustrated right now by this whole renewal of license bit. Sent the info back east to get my birth certificate and now they’re saying it was too blurry. So will have Beth help me figure out how to do it all on the computer Ugh. Got a ninety day extension yesterday. Sure wish this state made appointments at the DMV but they don’t. We’re having a warm spell, cranking the little air conditioner we have and also having a bit of wind.
      New chemo drug is causing constipation and some morning nausea just taking it every other day. We will see and I’ll hang in there for awhile.
      Guys working on the tiles out front. Looking good in spite of all the old cracked steps and curving wall. I am sorry to hear Ms. Alice is having hallucinations. Could be circulatory don’t you think or is it plain dementia. Oh this whole getting old thing. That’s what the blog next week is about. Take care dear friend, Love, Sue

  16. Chris, I know your Dad is upset but this is hopefully giving you a bit of a break. I know he won’t be happy until he gets to try it at home and hopefully eventually he will get that experience…after all the work you’ve done. Hope DH is doing okay.
    Not much to report here. New med is causing a few problems so we will see. Had to cancel PT today due to gut upset. UGH. I wish life would just plane out for awhile but have my doubts. Just taking it one day at a time right now. Thinking of you often, Love, Sue

  17. Tonie
    Yea my dad was quite a character all his life.always up to something!
    Sue
    Oh dear just hang in for a bit if you can with those meds .cam you take something for the constipation or even for the nausea
    My dad has another agency coming tomorrow to see him,so hope it goes ok
    I had to go to the Drs today.i had something in my eye from the garden the other day I was pulling at the ivy and there was a lot of stuff coming off it.it has been sore so I’ve been pouring drops into it to keep it moist but went today and it’s infected .they put dye In to see if it was scratched..but she says becos of the sjogrens it just got irritated .so see how it goes gotta go back if no better by Saturday
    Stil waking up gasping for breath..seems to be worse with the breathing exercises
    Jen yea I meant you for the weather….it gives it warmer next week I see
    Dentist tomorrow
    Chris

    • Chris, I’m so sorry your eye is so sore. Hope the meds help and you get some relief. It’s so hard to deal with when you’re trying to sleep, I know. I have to keep reminding myself with this heat to keep hydrating my eyes what with all the fans going. Yours sounds so painful. I’m sorry. Hope there’s a bit of steroids in with the antibiotic for relief.
      Hope the new agency will take on your Dad’s case but time will tell, huh?
      I don’t know what to think about your breathing. That’s scary. Are you keeping moist and drinking lots? I know they’ve looked at the airways. Hope they can do something that actually helps. Love you Sue

  18. Sue yep always drinking. Hoping the exercises work.see physio again in a few weeks
    And it’s just antibiotics for my eyes
    My dad has someone going to see him today as a 24hr live in carer.for a few weeks until they can get a care package sorted . Let’s hope she will take him on ,I will know in a few hrs .
    Off now to dentist
    Are you just the same sue on these meds .i do wish they could find a more amenable med for this
    Chris

  19. HEY,,,WEATHER PERKED UP, FEELING MORE LIKE SUMMER AT LAST………SUE STILL GOT TO WATER THE PLANTS ETC ON A REGULAR BASIS, AS ALTHOUGH THE WEATHER HAS BEEN COLD, THERE HASN’T BEEN MUCH RAIN.
    SUE I HOPE YOU SOON GET YOUR LICENSE SORTED OUT……HOW FRUSTRATING, FLIPPING BUREAUCRACY GONE MAD.
    SO SORRY YOU ARE HAVING A BAD EXPERIENCE WITH THE NEW DRUGS, NAUSEA AND NOT GOING TO THE LOO IS A NIGHTMARE FOR YOU, AND I PRAY FOR YOU THAT IT WILL SOON SETTLE DOWN AND BECOME EFFECTIVE.

    CHRIS…..I HOPE THE NEW AGENCY IS THE RIGHT ONE FOR YOUR DAD, IT WOULD BE A WEIGHT OFF YOUR SHOULDERS IF IT ALL WENT RIGHT FOR A CHANGE HUH?? I HOPE YOU WON’T HAVE TO GO BACK TO THE DOC TOMORROW WITH YOYR EYE, AND THAT IS SETTLES DOWN.
    ALSO HOPE THE DENTIST WENT OK.

    TONIE…..ENJOY THE CAMPING WITH THE KIDS AND YOUR FRIENDS…….I BET YOU HAVE A HEAP OF FUN, BEEN A FEW YEARS SINCE I DID THAT……TAKE SOME “PICS” I KNOW I ALWAYS ASK YOU TO DO THAT, BUT I LOVE TO SEE THEM, AND LOOK AFTER YOURSELF…NO MISHAPS.

    HOPE EVERYONE IS OK…………………….LOVE TO EVERYONE………JENNIE XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

  20. PS……MY KIDS WILL BE PERMANENTLY IN CORNWALL ON SUNDAY, I WILL HAVE LITTLE OR NO CONTACT FOR A TIME…DON’T KNOW HOW LONG, BEEN WEEPY ALL DAY, BEEN A TOUGH DAY, HAD TO SIT WITH FRIENDS WHOSE FAMILY HAD COME TO VISIT WITH THEM….I WAS HAPPY FOR THEM, BUT IT WAS UNBEARABLE…….SILLY OLD WOMAN OR WHAT??

  21. Jen
    You haven’t told me has Tim sold the house?
    Sue how are you
    Tonie
    Have fun

    Well this lady is so good she knows what she’s doing .and won’t let my dad do anything.she will go with him and help him on the scooter to church if he can and a bit of shopping and will guide him .do everything washing and cleaning. She does seem so good.will take him about on a wheelchair about the place.all the ladies there were kissing him .we sat there an hour talking to her outside the flat ,(she understood my problem .)waiting for my dad
    She organised his out of date stuff in fridge…made his bed and asked us to,get some more sheets .looked for his PJs ..was organing his meds
    He says she was first class when I rang..and she answers phone for him..wanted to know about people calling…I was really pleased
    I got some more money fir him ,,but told him to keep it by him…I know but I’m still careful…
    He’s going to go to town and take her fur lunch…I’m really pleased for him
    She is from Zimbabwe and is a lovely lady.been in the country 14 yrs…I’m relieved having talked to her.she seems very experienced .
    So gonna have a bath oh have to have a filling and now it aches since she’s messed with it
    Next week
    My eye seems easier tonight..so see how it is tomorrow as have to go to DD .dont really want to go to emerg.dr.again
    Ok folks tired tonight..sleep? Huh!
    Chris

    • Chris, finally, good news about your Dad. I’m so pleased you found someone so efficient. She sounds perfect so keep your eyes open and it is still a good idea to handle the finances. My MIL’s worker was good but look at all she stole so one must be cautious. I pray she is all she appears to be and your Dad gets along with her. Sounds like she will take some load off of your shoulders and also make him happy.
      I’m glad your eye is better…hopefully on the mend. Now a tooth? Girl, you are falling apart so you are definitely in the right club! Hope you’re breathing a sigh of relief and your DH’s B/P can stay down for awhile.
      I’m feeling terrible today. Took the new chemo last night and woke up nauseous with stomach ache. Looks like will have to stop. Didn’t get call back from the doc as yet. Ugh. Love you, Sue

    • CHRIS…..OH PETAL, I AM OVER THE MOON FOR YOU….AT LAST, SOMEONE WHO SEEMS TO FIT THE BILL, I AM KEEPING EVERYTHING CROSSED THAT YOU HAVE HIT THE JACKPOT THIS TIME, SHE SOUNDS AN ANGEL….THEY COME IN ALL FORMS.
      TIM’S HOUSE HAS AN OPEN DAY TODAY, SO WE ARE ALL ON PINS…..BUT HE GOES TO CORNWALL TOMORROW WHATEVER, AND HE WILL LEAVE IT IN THE HANDS OF AN AGENT, THE SAME ONE WHO SOLD THE “BIG HOUSE” FOR HIM.
      WEATHER PERKED UP A TREAT, GLAD TO HAVE MOST OF MY CHORES DONE, AND SPOKEN TO MY BOY ON HIS BIRTHDAY, NOW ITS CUPPA TIME AND A READ UNDER THE APPLE TREE……THEY KEEP DROPPING OFF, THEY DO THAT TILL ONLY THE GOOD ONES REMAIN FOR THE PICKING……JUST MY LUCK TO HAVE ONE DROP ON ME AND KNOCK ME OUT…..AH WELL, ITS ONE WAY OF GETTING SOME SLEEP……HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND MY FRIEND…….LOVE JEN XX

    • Chris:
      So happy you have found a good care taker for your Dad. Good for you and for him. And for the lady to have the job. It works out so good for all doesn’t it. Now maybe you can relax a bit.
      Love
      Tonie

  22. Sue
    I’ll be watchful .i know how much money he’s got.and he had got lots of food. She is supposed to look after herself etc. so I hope my dad doesn’t start buying for her when he’s out. It’s difficult talking to him into Company so I’m trusting but looking! He said he will take her out for lunch ..that’s ok..as long as he doesn’t run away with it
    Can you call the Dr. Yourself Sue What with the w.end coming..those blimmin meds why can’t they find one just for you…you can’t keep feeling like that can you get in touch with that fella too
    My breathing doesn’t seem as sore…the nurse was saying the Vagus nerve was so near where the acid is that it affects the airways……..??
    Eye…well I’m hoping to go to DD and not the walk In centre today.
    Just I can’t drive if I’m needed to if DH not well….
    I hope you can have a peaceful. W.end at least .no more events happening for you!
    How far has the tiling got ..does it look good?
    Love Chris

  23. SUE….READING THROUGH CHRIS’S POST TO YOU…..I AM OF THE SAME MIND, IF YOU STILL HAVE THE NAUSEA, THEN YOU WILL NOT BE EATING A LOT, AND THEN WHAT HAPPENS TO YOUR STRENGTH?? I AM PRAYING FOR YOU DEAR FRIEND, AND HOPE THE DOCTOR CONTACTED YOU, SO YOU CAN HAVE A BETTER WEEKEND……..LOVE YOU…JEN X

    • Jennie, I am unfortunately caught in a medical records/computer trap. Neither one of my doctor’s have the report from the ultrasound because they are on different computer systems than the hospital here in town where I had it done. Oddly enough, my PT had it and read it to me. I’ll get the results next week. May have to have a biopsy on the small nodule on my abdomen…we’ll see. I talked to the oncologist who was kind enough to call me back this AM and he told me to stop the latest chemo pill…my third type…and to see if I feel better in a couple of days and then to try cutting them in half with a pill cutter and try the lower dose. He wants me to do something, even if it is a very small amount. Obviously I am very sensitive to these hormone type of chemotherapy drugs. I’m tired of the whole thing.
      Got an extension on my license for driving and have to send for my birth certificate. Thanks to all the illegals creeping into our country. No, I’m not against immigration but would prefer it legal.
      I’m so pleased Tim and Claire will be together in their new lovely town and hope his remodel sells well.
      The tile folks finished the job on our entry steps and it looks lovely. Yes, I’ll try to take pics when I feel up to the challenge. So pleased you’re sounding a bit better. Hope you’re enjoying summer. Love, Sue

      • Sue, sorry for your troubles with this stupid med again. I have been praying for your judgement on this again. Praying for you each day . Love you
        Tonie

      • SUE…..FIRST OFF “HAPPY BIRTHDAY”…….WISH YOU WERE FEELING BETTER FOR IT LOVELY LADY….OH NO, NOT THE COMPUTER TRAP……MY SWEET LIFE, THEY ARE A PAIN SOMETIMES, I HOPE IT ALL GETS SORTED OUT ASAP. I CAN’T TELL YOU HOW MANY TIMES THAT HAPPENED TO MY SON…..HE USED TO GET SO UPSET, ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU HAVE PRIVATE INSURANCE.
        PERHAPS A BIOPSY ON THAT LUMP WILL GIVE YOU SOME PEACE OF MIND SUE, AT LEAST YOUR ONCOLOGIST IS ON THE BALL, SOUNDS LIKE A GOOD PLAN TO REDUCE THE CHEMO PILL, OH WHAT A BUSINESS, NO WONDER YOU ARE SICK OF IT ALL…..PRAYING FOR A SOLUTION FOR YOU LOVE.
        GLAD YOU GOT THE EXTENSION ON OUR LICENSE, BIT OF A PEST HAVING TO SEND FOR YOUR BIRTH CERTIFICATE….I TAKE IT YOU MEAN A COPY?? WHAT HAPPENED TO THE ORIGINAL, DID IT GET LOST?
        WE HAVE THE SAME PROBLEMS WITH THE ILLEGALS, ITS AWFUL, AND BRITAIN AND FRANCE HAVE GOT TOGETHER TO APPEAL TO THE REST OF EUROPE TO TAKE THEIR SHARE…..HUH!! WATCH THIS SPACE……
        TIM AND CLAIRE WILL BE ON THEIR WAY TO THE “WEST COUNTRY” BY NOW, THEY WILL BE SO PLEASED TO JUST BE TOGETHER AGAIN…..DON’T KNOW IF THE HOUSE SOLD OR NOT YET, BUT ITS BEEN LEFT IN THE HANDS OF AN AGENT, SO NO PROBLEM.
        I BET THE TILING LOOKS SPLENDID…..DON’T WORRY ABOUT THE PHOTO’S….WHEN YOU FEEL UP TO IT.
        RIGHT BETTER GO, NEED SOME TIME WITH HUBBY AND SACHA…….KEEP SMILING BRAVE LADY….I LOVE YOU…JEN XX

  24. Chris, so glad you are off to a good start with your dad’s carer. I hope it continues.

    Jen, hoping you enjoyed some nice reading time with no headaches. 😉

    Sue, sorry you are still dealing with nausea. I sure wish things would settle with you for a while. *sigh*

    • LYN …..YES THANKS I DID…..MORE OF THE SAME TODAY, THANKS FOR YOUR HELP YESTERDAY, YOU ARE BETTER THAN I AT SORTING THINGS LIKE THAT……HAPPY WEEKEND…LOVE JENNIE X

    • Lyn, thanks for the thoughts. I also would like to have a normal type life…which now makes my life before cancer seem normal and we all know it wasn’t but it sure as heck beat this existence. Not sure about trying a smaller dose of the chemo. Along with PT it has all been more than I could keep up with.
      Enjoy watching your walking, patio, etc. pics on FB. Makes us all more real to each other. Hope kids doing well. Fondly, Sue

  25. Good morning all:
    It is an unseasonably cool morning here. Was yesterday also. The night we camped out. Coldest of the summer, in the 50’s. I was cold, wet and miserable all night. But the kids had a great time. They slept in a tent, and Carol, Bruce and I slept on the hay wagon. We had a fire, and about 4:30 I think we all three were up and sitting around the fire to warm up. I came home, did what I had to and took a nap. Got more things done and rested the rest of the day. My brother had loaned me a cot to sleep on which was surprisingly comfortable. We cooked hotdogs, roasted marshmellows, played with FLARP (had a contest ) told stories, listened to the animals, and counted airplanes and UFO’s going over us. It was a beautiful night with a moon so bright I covered my head to sleep.
    I still feel the effects this morning but not so bad. We laughed so much, It is amazing how much fun you can have with no technology.
    Sue glad you got the tiles done. Prayers for your body to feel better. I know how you long for a little more normalcy.
    I need to get down to business with all the work I need to get done. Looks like I will be meeting my new friend this week. All his shipments will be leaving the UK on the 4th, so he will be coming by this week. I will keep you informed.
    Fresh tomatoes, peppers, zuchininis, cucmbers. I am in heaven. Soon corn and cantelopes and watermelon. I want to get some garlic and make me some fresh salsa . I still have the berries in the freezer to make jam with but think the peaches I got Devin are going to have to come first.
    HAPPY BIRTHDAY to our dear SUE this day !!
    God bless you lady, today and many more to come !! We love you to the moon and back !!
    Tonie

    • Tonie, please forgive me for being absent from the blog yesterday. Fairly busy day with low energy and a lot of time spent on FB. Close to two hundred birthday greetings from so many kind well wishers. Both Jim and Beth and grands brought me beautiful bouquets. So many beautiful flowers this time of year. Got to visit with them all then got a call from my son from TX who called from a business trip in Chicago. He travels so much. Just a nice day in all. Feeling a bit better each day I don’t take the chemo pill. Now the doctor wants me to cut it in half and try that…dread, dread.
      I’m sure we all will be thinking about you and anxious to see how you like your new friend. What will be will be, right?
      Sounds like your sleepover was damp, tiring but fun. You won’t forget it for awhile, that’s for certain. Just read today’s entry and hope you get half of what you plan accomplished. Heat back, huh? I know what you about the fatigue, as all of us would agree. Guess we just have to work through it. I haven’t figured out a choice. Wish there was a magic wand, pill or something to help. Trod on. Love you, Sue

      • Sue:
        It was your Birthday so you are forgiven !! 🙂 So glad it was a good one for you. I pray everyday for that pill not hurting you. But I wonder if it not better to have a better quality of life ?? I want you so much to be feeling like Sue again. As I know do you. Just remember praying for the best my dear friend !!
        Well no more “new friend” I have no time to play games. Some people just have nothing better to do I guess. But I am too busy. Nothing lost except a bunch of time. All is well. Back to normal !
        Went to SC to pick up my granddaughter and caught up with an old friend I haven’t seen in 25 years. So good to see him if not for a few moments . He and his wife have been my friends forever. Just picked right up where we left off. Hope to get together with them soon. He always smells so good, after you hug him you smell his lovely cologne for a while 🙂 Hard to believe we both have grandchildren now. God is good to reunite us with loved ones, is He not.
        Well, I gotta run. Get ready for work. Then grocery shop afterwards. I am gonna be exhausted tonight !!
        Take it easy my dear and God bless you
        Love
        Tonie

  26. Hi
    Yea I agree with all jen said for Sue..I wish our Sue all our prayers
    Well at coast
    Just had a ham salad sitting outside
    Lovely weather it’s 9pm here
    My dad is so happy with this lady, she Is so good
    Sits him Outside in wheel chair to have his friends around and says she will take him out so he gets out of the building but he’s no good for the buggy as he can’t correct himself. So she says she can strap him in the wheelchair and take extra clothing In case .they are going for a wander around the park one day and an icecream there.then he’s going to show her around the cathedral another day . He sounds much stronger too and looking forward to things
    Shame this is only until they get a care package together……but maybe I can swing it somehow..fingers crossed.
    Well gonna make a cup of tea
    Oh and a Danish!
    Chris

    • Chris, I am so pleased with the new that your Dad likes his caregiver so much. She sounds very innovative and thoughtful. Hope you get to keep her on. Glad you’re at the coast and enjoying some breathing space for both of you. Sounds wonderful.
      No PT for me this week…a week off so will try to remember to do exercises…remember to force myself. I’ve been feeling so badly it’s been a challenge. Feeling weak but less nauseous. Don’t know if I can bring myself to try the lower dose or not. We will see in a week or so. Thanks for the birthday greetings. It was a nice, low key day for me. Beautiful bouquets from Jim and Beth. Later dear, love you, Sue

  27. Good morning all:
    Beautiful day here. But I think Sept weather is slipping in fast. I must get going and work in the yard before it gets hot. Get it done and then clean in the house. (is it ever done ?) then some rest time in betweens. Pushing as usual. Being tires is a perpetual state of being, is it not ? No matter how much I rest, sleep or just sit around I am always tired.
    Gotta get my little minions up and put them to their assigned tasks !
    Prayers for all a great day.
    Love
    Tonie

  28. Jennie dear, Always good to hear from you. Thanks for the greetings for my birthday. Sounds like things are moving right along for Tim. That’s so good. Hope the agent moves the house quickly for them. Yes, the tile here is lovely and I always have such a sense of relief to regain our privacy when we have something done around here. I’m sure you know what I mean…all that getting up early, knocks at the door, etc.
    Saw the pic of your lavender from last year on FB and assume it’s even more beautiful this year. I have a couple of pots of it but mine is English, isn’t your French? It’s all fabulous. I love lavender. We also have to water just on the covered porch due to the wind, not so much the heat. Outside, nature pretty much takes care of it with frequent rain showers. All of the western states here right now are having terrible wild fires. Terrible destruction. May be the worse in history they said on the news this AM. Drought conditions cause such tragedy.
    Glad you’re feeling a bit better now. One day at a time, right? Love you, Sue

    • HI SUE……YES THE LAVENDER IS FROM LAST YEAR, AND YOU ARE RIGHT, IT IS FRENCH, BUT WE HAVE ENGLISH ALSO ROUND TE BACK OF THE HOUSE………….I AM GLAD YOU HAVE SOME PRIVACY BACK, MY DH HAS JUST PULLED UP THAT LOVELY CAMELIA BUSH BY THE FRONT DOOR, I WAS GUTTED AS HE NEVER SAID HE WAS GOING TO DO IT, IN ITS PLACE HOWEVER, HE IS BUILDING ANOTHER BLOCK OF PATIO, AND PUTTING A BLUE GAZEBO WHERE THE BUSH WAS, THEN POTS OF PLANTS IN DIFFERENT HEIGHTS, IT WILL LOOK NICE, SO I CAN HARDLY COMPLAIN……..HOW ARE YOU GETTING ON WITH THE TABLET REDUCTION, LORD I HOPE IT MAKES A DIFFERENCE FOR YOU, TO FEEL SICK ALL THE TIME IS ROTTEN, TAKE ME BACK TO MY FIRST PREGNANCY, EVERY DAY FOR NINE MONTHS, AND EVEN WHEN GIVING BIRTH…..ITS A WONDER I WENT ON TO HAVE TIM LATER.
      YES ITS DREADFUL TO HEAR OF ALL THE FIRES, IT ALWAYS HAPPENS IN THAT AREA IT SEEMS DOESN’T IT, AS EVERYWHERE WHERE THERE IS DROUGHT THERE FOLLOWS FIRES, WE HAVE TO PRAY FOR RAIN, SO FOLKS DON’T LOSE THEIR HOMES, AND ANIMALS DON’T PERISH.
      TIM AND CLAIRE WAITING FOR CLOSURE FROM ALL WHO HAVE OFFERED ON THEIR “LITTLE HOUSE”, ALL SHOULD BE ON THE TABLE BY THE WEEKEND, THEN THEY DECIDE WHO TO SELL TO……..MEANWHILE, CLAIRE IS BACK AT WORK, AND TIM IS LOOKING FOR HIS NEXT PROJECT………WISHING YOU A BETTER DAY DEAR FRIEND…….I LOVE YOU….JEN XX

      • Jennie, I would have been upset over losing a lovely bush also. How does your DH manage to lift all those heavy pots? I’ve had to go to the fake ones just for that reason but then again, maybe guys are stronger. The new project does sound lovely and I know you’ll enjoy it and he gets to use his creativity.
        Only feeling slightly better. Still problems with communication about the ultrasound. UGH. Tummy problems continue. Sick of it. Oh yes, I have often thought of my first pregnancy..same symptoms as yours was.
        Hope the kids make lots of money on their little house after all that work. Expecting the best for them. Love, Sue

  29. Hi all
    Sue
    Hope things more peaceful for you now. Take your time to decide on taking these meds.they sound so toxic for you
    I know what you mean about people doing stuff in the house and privacy..it’s like waiting for them to come and ready for them, then waiting then they don’t come…it’s so nice to have the house to yourself
    My dads carer has changed she had to go to someone else ,but his new carer he likes too.so all good.except he was ready to go out today in the wheelchair and she had to go to this other person.so the new lady had to get used to my dad etc…so tomorrow they will go to town ..he has this new one for the rest of the two weeks
    Good weather here but windy.my eye is easier..well a bit ,was ok but seems sore tonite .perhaps the wind
    DH bp uppish
    Jen ..how’s you?
    Tonie
    Exciting times to come
    Lynn.. how’s the painting the furniture going?
    Ok I’ve put on weight gotta stop it ..ugh
    Chris

    • Yes Chris, I will think carefully before taking this “poison” again. It’s not an easy decision but when I look back on this year, I’ve spent most of it being sick on these chemo oral drugs. I’m trying to concentrate on what has worked for me this year and many things have, like PT to help my surgery and shoulder. That’s much better. My back is a bit better but not what I had hoped with the PT. Life goes on as it does for you.
      How’s the breathing going right now? Are you continuing the treatments? Glad your Dad likes the second new care giver. That’s so good. I know he’s thrilled to be home.
      Speaking of workers in the home, our washer is acting out and I have to wait all Wed. for a repairman. Such is life. Can’t do without the washing machine. Later dear..good to hear from you. Love, Sue

    • HI CHRIS……WELL IT SEEMS DAD HAS REALLY STRUCK GOLD, HAVING TWO CARERS HE HAS LIKED, PITY ITS ONLY FOR TWO WEEKS.
      BEAUTIFUL WEATHER HERE ALSO, BLIMEY I AM SO DAMN TIRED, WE HAD TO BE UP EARLY TODAY, TO TAKE DELIVERY OF THE NEW MATTRESS AND “TOPPER” FOR MY DH, WE HAD TO CLEAN UNDER THE BED, PULL OUT ALL THE FURNITURE, GET THE OLD MATTRESS OFF, READY FOR THEM TO LOAD IT IN THE VAN FOR RECYCLING…..THEN THE DRIVERS KEPT PHONING TO SAY THEY WERE LOST, AND MY FRENCH NOT BEING GREAT, HAD TO TRY AND GIVE THEM DIRECTIONS…..WHEW! WE DECIDED TO CLEAN THE WHOLE HOUSE IN THE END, AS TOMORROW DH HAS TO BE AT THE HOSPITAL FOR 8-30 FOR HIS HEART MONITORING, SO MAKING THE MOST OF THE SUNSHINE BEFORE THE BUILDERS YARD DELIVER CEMENT AND PAVING SLABS…….ITS ALL GO.
      I AM GLAD YOUR EYE IS A BIT BETTER, BUT LIKE YOU SAY IT COULD BE SORE FROM WIND, THAT DOESN’T SOUND QUITE RIGHT DOES IT????
      TAKE CARE MY FRIEND, HOPE YOU GET SOME “ME” TIME……..LOVE JEN X

  30. Well
    Hi to all
    Jen
    All go for you.sounds nice whatever Dh is doing to the front
    Weather cool and windy here too cool to sit out
    when you’ve got sjogrens ….the wind blows stuff about and even with glasses on it blows bits In the eyes.then it’s sore for ages as there is no safety film covering over the eye ..blooms nuisence
    Tonie
    Just as well you made that decision now rather than further down the line
    Sue
    Yep still doing the breathing exercises..its to slow the breathing and small breaths only 12 a minute.to get my brain used to less co2 .im gasping for breath and yawning ,but am getting more used to it and not trying to deep breath all the time.
    I agree with tonie it will be good to get to some quality of feeling back into life
    Have you heard from your Dr yet re scaN
    Hope the man will come for the washer early for you.i wish workmen could stick to a time
    Chris

    • Chris, no haven’t heard since Saturday when the second doctor, my oncologist called and said he didn’t have the scan either. Called hospital today and told them to send both of them again. Hope it works because I still have upset gut. Haven’t had a chemo pill since Thursday evening so they should be gone pretty soon out of my system if they are the problem. Having trouble eating anything right now so must get to the bottom of this nonsense.
      Glad the breathing treatments seem to finally be helping you. Hope the eye heals soon. Know just what you mean about the dry eyes and wind, fans, etc. Pain in the old tush isn’t it??? Love, Sue

  31. Tonie, glad to hear oldest GD back with you. Hope all is well with her. As far as the new friend, sounds like a near miss and a good thing for you. Fun to run into old friends and remember past times, isn’t it? Love a guy who smells good. As we all know, some don’t.
    Awe, the things we talk about on here sometimes,, huh? It does sound like you’re in for a full day. Hope Ms. Alice has a good day and hope your shopping isn’t too stressful. Are the kids still going through groceries like worker ants and normal kids? Thinking of you. Love, Sue

  32. Hello, all!
    Tonie, somehow I missed the end of the “new friend” and had to scroll back and find it. Sheesh. As was already said, better now than later.
    Chris, I completed the pieces I had planned on redoing and they turned out nicely. Fun doing it, but I have to take my time with these hands. Now I’ve acquired another! Just a cheap old little table I can use on our back patio. I didn’t want to spend much nor end up with something plastic or the like. This is a little half moon style table and I’ll paint, distress and wax it like the other pieces – in time. It has a tiny wobble, but will work just fine for what I want it for.
    Best to all!

    • Lyn, Any creativity is fun, fruitful and healthy. I’ve been going through old files, shredding, very slow work. I also got a pile to go to Goodwill. Enough for one day besides watering plants, etc. Sounds like fun for you. I love to see old pieces saved. Love, Sue

  33. Sue
    Do you think it mite be the gall stones playing up. They can make you nauseated.would a low fat diet help,or have you tried that?
    Eye sore ! so gonna close…lyn all sounds great..still gotta do my candlesticks
    Chris

    • Chris dear, sorry the eye is still a problem. A scratch will take awhile I fear. Be sure to keep it moist, okay? No, as far as gallstones, I asked the oncologist on the phone today and he said he didn’t think that was the problem. He thinks I still don’t have that last medication out of my system just yet. Chemo is like poison, truly. Take care dear girl, Sue

  34. Jen
    How did DH hosp appt go ?
    Yea I’m in one of those muddles I never know what day of the the week it is lately?
    Sue
    You think they would have a better drug by now so it would be Tailord to you….maybe you will start to feel better today
    Well, done something to my knee, so sore it goes into a position and I have to straighten it out.kept me awake all night,it’s like behind the knee at the side.i think I knelt on it when some people were here.they called on Us As they hadn’t seen us for a while and hoped we were ok. They stayed for a bit it was nice.
    Like Jen they lived in France until 1 year ago.came back and bought two of these lodges one here and one further inland and they go between the both….nice lifestyle
    Well gotta get up somehow
    Chris

    • HI CHRIS………..THE HOSPITAL APPOINTMENT WENT WELL……THE DOCTOR WAS REALLY PLEASED WITH MY DH, HE SCORED 83% OUT OF 100% WHICH WAS HIGH FOR IS AGE…..TENSION, STRESS LEVELS AND BREATHING WERE ALL GOOD, AT THE MOMENT HE IS OUTSIDE HEAVING BIG SLABS UP THE PATH IN THE FRONT GARDEN, DON’T KNOW HOW HE DOES IT.
      YOU SEEM TO BE MAKING NEW FRIENDS AT THE SHED, WHERE IN FRANCE DID THOSE PEOPLE LIVE, PROBABLY SOUTH/SOUTH WEST…..A LOT OF BRITS LIKE THE WARMTH, WE ARE NORTH……GREAT WEATHER FOR THE NEXT TEN DAYS, HOW IS IT FOR YOU, AND HOW IS YOUR BREATHING AND DH’S BP??
      LOVE JEN X

      • Hi Jennie, good to hear your husband is doing so well. His active lifestyle is probably very good for him and keep him strong as well as being good cardio exercise. Hope you’re doing okay today. We’re cool here today with a breeze. Had a nasty brush fire at one of our local beaches where folks camp out, fish, etc. Think it’s out by now but so much beauty up in flames is sickening. Have a good one today, okay and I will also try. Have to get my washing machine repaired today. Miss it. Love, Sue

    • Oh Chris, It sounds like your knee should be checked. Moving out of position sounds like you tore something in there. Knees can be very complicated so please don’t take any chances. If it’s so painful, ice might help but please think about the long run effect.
      It’s good to have friends come to visit and they sound interesting that’s for certain. Yes, I hope to feel better today. That would be a relief. Have some errands I need to run but have been putting off. Do take care dear lady..Love, Sue

  35. Hi
    Sue
    It was so sore this morning but at least now this afternoon I can walk on it..can’t bend it tho..but I forgot about the ice I will try that,thank you
    Jen
    Those people from France, they used to live there till about a year ago ,20 miles south of St. Malo in a small village Cuguen,or Cuguan ,not sure which ..they took about 2 yrs to sell their house
    Just been to there’s for a coffee,nice couple,chatting for 2 hrs
    Ok ..going to try and have a shower
    Back to home tomorrow for a filling ,ugh and back here Friday as DD is coming up by herself for the w.endLooking forward to it and got nice things to make to eat,so hope my knees a bit better.ill start the ice thingy
    And there is a horse show on here in the village over those days,so she will love that.
    Chris

    • Chris, sounds better but bears watching. Knees are tricky so be good to it. I know you’re looking forward to the weekend with DD. Have fun and eat well…sounds like you will. Good luck at the dreaded dentist. Love you, Sue

  36. Morning all:
    Wow it has been busy on here of late. As have I . THursday, I am always so tired by Thursday. Nikki will be leaving on Friday to come home. Not sure if she is stopping or driving straight thru. It is a long drive. It will be a complete madhouse around here for a bit. I already made me a reservation at the beach for Sept. Just me and the boys going for a couple of days. I need a break from everything.
    Yes, Sue the kids are still eating like cockroaches !! I made squash casserole for them last night. They liked the chicken 🙂 I am taking the remains to Ms Alice for lunch today. I thought it was good, but squash is an acquired taste. Made a can of salsa last night and sealed it in. I have to make the jam this weekend , clear up space in my freezer.
    Do take care all. Love and kisses.
    Tonie

    • BLIMEY TONIE……YOU WILL MEET YOURSELF COMING BACKWARDS IF YOU DO ANY MORE…..BOY DO YOU NEED A BREAK……SOUNDS LIKE YOU ARE HAVING A BALL WITH THE KIDS, BUT YOU MUST BE EXHAUSTED, THE BEACH IN SEPTEMBER SOUNDS LIKE FUN, WHY DO YOU HAVE TO RESERVE IT, IS IT NORMALLY PRIVATE THEN? FORGIVE MY IGNORANCE, JUST NOT USED TO DIFFERENT WAYS.
      HOW KIND OF YOU TO TAKE MISS ALICE HER LUNCH, SHE IS SO LUCKY TO HAVE YOU…..HOW ARE THINGS IN THE GARDEN? SINCE MOVING, WERE YOU ABLE TO GET STUFF PLANTED UP IN TIME FOR A DECENT CROP??……GOOD LUCK WITH THE JAM MAKING….LOVE JEN X

    • Tonie, I agree with the others and stand in amazement at how busy you always are. That frugality really chimes in doesn’t it in order to preserve and save foods. I love the way you look and plan ahead. So pleased you’re getting away for a sanity break soon. WIsh Nikki and the little ones a safe trip back to you. Pray her plans are coming together. Does she plan to wait to get there to decide which area to settle in? Much to do, huh? Well dear girl, life is not lonely now, huh? Thinking of you fondly, Love, Sue

  37. Tonie
    You deserve this break when it comes..you are soo busy all the time

    Well my dad had a change of carer again..they assured me it wasn’t my dad
    But this new carer is a young girl she’d only been there a couple of hours and the agency rang me that he’s had been making sexual comments to her ,she is a young girl..well younger than the others
    Stuff like he’d like to go to bed with her and they’ve said if she is changing him to leave the room for a while
    So they asked me to ring him..oh dear..this is so not my dad at all..so I just did it without thinking about it
    I said they had rang me and the sexual comments and he is to stop otherwise it’s a nursing home..it’s so awkward.ive got shopping to do for him now when at home. And take around…so it’s all yucky!
    This break has been all phone calls about him and Dh is so fed up and he’s not well either heartbeat going funny ,I’m worried
    sue
    How are you..have you had results of the scan yet?
    Back later when home
    Chris

    • Chris, I’m so sorry for the new trouble with your Dad. I wrote you an email. I can certainly understand your concern for your DH and hope you get back to the coast soon and know you’re keeping an eye on him. Oh life, huh?
      I am still having trouble with the nausea and can only wait for it to play out. The oncologist told me this week that it could take awhile since I reacted so violently to all the oral chemo drugs. I think they did a number on the lining of my gut and stomach. I’m taking anti-nausea meds and we have increased my protonic, Aciphex. It helped me to do that a few years ago when I had a bad round from another cause. I’m sick of the whole subject as you can imagine and striving to make it through the days.
      Our washer has had it; the bearings are shot and it’s only three years old. Oh bother. We have an old one in the basement and it looks like I’ll be using it for awhile if I can pitch enough laundry down the stairs safely. That washer is seventeen years old and still works. We got the one upstairs, the stackable with dryer to avoid the stairs. The repairman is the son of the man we bought the new one from and he’s trying to get General Electric to give us a deal on parts to try to fix it.
      Do take care and ride out this new wave of trouble my dear friend. Thinking of all of you, Sue

      • Chris, PS the scan on that small growth I have is of unknown etiology, whatever that means and we’re going to watch it for awhile and if it grows, we’ll take it out. Sue

      • Well sue I certainly hope all of this works like tomorrow it’s all much to much.but I know you will See this thru
        I remember you buying this stackable washer. So soon to be had it…do be careful with those stairs carrying washing
        I saw the email before the blog so all my answers are on here…I see about the growth .well that’s good just to watch it,it must look ok to them tho
        Just get this tummy problem out of the way and there’s still the rest of the summer to enjoy before winter sets in
        Sorted out all my mail on coming home ,watered the plants .no meal to make as we sat out in a garden on way home of a teashop and had roasted veg quiche.new boiled pots,salad and Cole slaw. Well John did I had a cheese sandwich ,safer for me!
        Chris

  38. HELLO…..

    SUE….HOPE YOU GOT YOUR WASHING MACHINE FIXED, WHO THE HELL CAN DO WITHOUT THAT?
    I HOPE THERE WAS NO-ONE HURT IN THE BEACH FIRE, A BIT CLOSE TO HOME HUH? YES HUBBY DID WELL ON THE MACHINE.
    BEEN HAVING A BIT MORE TUMMY TROUBLE, SAME AS BEFORE, BUT I HAVE THE MEDS IN PLACE, AND E.R IF I NEED IT.
    BEAUTIFUL WEATHER HERE, LIKE YOU, JUST A NICE BREEZE TO STOP US FROM MELTING.
    HOW IS IT GOING WITH YOUR MEDS NOW? I HOPE THE NEW REGIME IS WORKING FOR YOU AND YOU DON’T FEEL SO NAUSEOUS……….MUCH LOVE JEN XX

    • Jennie, I think I answered most of your questions in my post to Chris. Sorry your gut is acting up. Weather there sounds so lovely and hope you’re up to enjoying it.
      As far as my new regime, no I have had to stop yet another oral chemo and probably will not take it again no matter how much the doctor urges. I know he’s trying to help me and appreciate it but enough already.
      Hope all is going well with your son and Claire. Love you, Sue

  39. OOPS…..HAVEN’T FINISHED YET!!!

    CHRIS….ST MALO, WE KNOW IT WELL AND GO TO A PLACE JUST A FEW MILES FROM THERE, IN FACT IF WE WANTED TO GO AND SEE TIM AND CLAIRE LATER ON, WE WOULD SAIL FROM THERE TO PLYMOUTH.
    I HOPE YOU KNEE IS SHOWING SIGNS OF IMPROVEMENT, AND ALL WENT WELL AT THE DENTIST, NASTY PLACES. JUST THE SMELL MAKES ME WANT TO BARF.
    BLOOMING HECK MY FRIEND, YOUR CUP IS OVERFLOWING WITH WORRY FROM YOUR DAD……BUT I DO KNOW HE IS NOT AWARE OF WHAT HE IS DOING, AND THAT IS HARD FOR YOU, WHEN YOU CALL HIM AND TELL HIM TO STOP MAKING THOSE REMARKS, THE CHANCES ARE HE WON’T HAVE A CLUE WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT……OR DOES HE?????
    ITS NOT BEEN MUCH OF A BREAK AT ALL….LORD I HOPE THIS WEEKEND IS BETTER FOR YOU AND YOUR DH, YOU BOTH SOUND AT THE END OF YOUR TETHER……TAKE HEART LOVE, IT WON’T ALWAYS BE LIKE THIS….LOVE YOU…JEN X

  40. Hi all
    Back at shed
    DD coming early in the morning
    dH bp up high
    Met the carer she was such a nice girl about 21 ish
    I talked to her and what she said was a bit worse than I thought and my dad clutched her arm and wouldn’t let it go..she has to attend to him etc and sleep there.she has put it behind her and she says he has too ,altho he said to her it wasn’t sexual..but hell what else was it..! she had to ring up the other carer and he did the same to her,but she said she was more experienced ..but it shouldn’t happen anyway..and I am concerned for her there..he was very quiet when I was there and it was all uncomfortable and he didn’t really speak to me..I felt isolated from him
    Well how’d your day go Sue.hope you haven’t got much washing down those steps
    Jen
    Hope your ibs is ok..my dentist went ok,only a small filling I didn’t have an injection. I really wanted A nice treat after it..do you remember those times?? but it feels sensitive tonight
    Ok been sitting outside ,nice nite warm and just a small breeze.its nearly midnite now
    Chris

    • HI CHRIS………IBS A BIT OF A SOD, I DIDN’T HELP IT MUCH YESTERDAY BY IMBIBING OF THE RED STUFF, WE WERE OUT TO LUNCH, AND IT WAS ONE OF THOSE TIMES WHEN YOU JUST THINK….WHY NOT!! SO THROUGHOUT THE MEAL I KNOCKED BACK THREE GLASSES, AND NOT BEING A DRINKER….WELL!!!
      OH DEAR WHAT A TODO WITH YOUR DAD, IN ONE WAY ITS LIKE….”THE OLD DOG STILL GOT IT”, BUT ON THE OTHER, A REAL EMBARRASSMENT FOR YOU, AND NOT VERY PLEASANT FOR THAT POOR GIRL.
      GLAD THE DENTIST WENT OK, DID YOU HAVE A TREAT? I DID LAST NIGHT, I HAD SOME GREEN TEA ICE CREAM…YUMMY.
      I TAKE IT YOU ARE AT THE SHED…HOPE YOU ARE, AND THAT YOU ARE CHILLAXING……TAKE CARE LOVE….JEN XX

      • Hey ya’all hope you are a all good today. I am with the kids in the movie waiting on Ant Man to come on. We are all Stan lee fans. They start school on Monday so last treat
        Chris. Things like that happen with elderly men esp with a little dimensia my friend Carol is always telling me about her grandfather. He was really bad. She was always saying. I’m sorry for him. Just hang in there
        Well gotta go. Love to you all
        Tonie

    • Chris, glad you’re at the beach house and hopefully, it will bring down your DH’s B/P. Life is just sometimes too much, it seems. As far as your Dad, sounds like the time has come to treat him like the misbehaving little child he is. He knew it was wrong, obviously because he wouldn’t look at you so hang in there. I’m sorry you have to do this. Glad the dental visit went well and suspect the sensitivity will calm down…hope so. How is the rest of your body? What a time you’ve had, with the knee and all. Still here and thinking of you. Sending love and hugs, Sue
      P.S. Still fighting gastritis from the last chemo pill but better each day. No more of that poison for me.

  41. Yea Jen at shed DD here and had a good time around the shops.it was fun having coffee and looking at the sea and chatting..and her telling me off as she does..all good.looked in craft shops ,ice cream .went out for a meal tonite. I think she maybe staying and extra nite,..she certainly stops you thinking its good for me. And DH
    Sue
    One knee still sore and from walking today,but worth it
    Good you’ve decided so positively about those meds ,it makes the decision easier
    Let’s hope it goes quickly away now
    Dh took an extra bp tab last night ,well a smaller dose and its okish today
    My dad does seem more chirpy today.he rang me.the carer took him in wheelchair to shops it was a lovely sunny day today
    Tonie
    Thank you it helps knowing others have a similar problem
    When do you stop ,you are always so busy
    Chris

    • Chris, I always want to ask you how you’re sleeping when I hear from you in the middle of your night. So pleased you’re having such a good visit with your daughter. It sounds wonderful and so much quiet enjoyment. There is something about the company of an only daughter that can make a day. I’m sure she’s telling you to take care of yourself dear lady. Rest that knee, okay? Glad to hear your Dad is having a good time and getting out. One day at a time, right? Love, Sue

      • Yea I wake as usual but I do go back to sleep quicker than usual and to sleep at the start as well.i don’t wake up gasping for breath now with continuing these breathing exercises. That seemed to come on at the start of them!
        dH and dd gone for a walk on the beach and collect some shells for things she wants to make
        I’m reading blimmin knee sore again all along back of calf too
        I couldn’t go anyway with the sand
        Yea DD tells me to stop doing things etc stop worrying about so and so..and stop planning just relax now..all that stuff…
        Hope you have a better w.end
        Chris

  42. Chris, Sounds like you’re having a good time…which is great. Gathering shells is always so fun, with each being so unique. Sounds like DD and DH enjoy each others company. Sorry about your knee but think you aren’t too surprised after yesterday, huh? Hope you’re all chilling out a bit after all you’ve been through. Yep…know what you mean about the sand blowing, etc. Always have to watch our eyes and breathing. Life is a pain so often but still precious.. Love, Sue

  43. Morning all:
    Being lazy this morning, as I was yesterday. So nice to lay here in the quiet and drink my coffee. Been awake for a while, but can’t seem to get going these past few days. So tired all the time.
    My sister had a cookout for the kids yesterday. We didn’t have church, so we had all the time we needed. I had promised them chicken n dumplings, so we had them as well. Their mom is in route to us. In Texas as we speak. Took the kids to get their hair trimmed up for school on Sat. Devin got the cutest pixie cut, it suits her so much. School started today, but I can’t register them. So they will start when Mom gets here.
    My left shoulder blade area is killing me of late. Not sure what I did to aggravate it.
    Chris, glad you had a good day with your daughter. Looking forward to a few of those myself in the future.
    Take care all
    Love
    Tonie

    • Tonie, so today you slept in according to FB. You probably needed it. Is Nikki traveling alone with three little ones? What a journey. I know you’re getting excited by their arrival. What a chaotic ball you will all have. Good the older kids are getting ready for school and putting down roots, even if it is temporary until Nikki gets settled. Interesting to see how it all goes for her life and theirs.
      Your shoulder blade? Is it from the back or is it possibly arthritis in your shoulder? My gosh,, it’s really true that it is always something, huh? Hope you spread the work when all are there for however long. Also hope the weather is cooperating with all you have to do to get ready for winter. Think of you so often…Love you, Sue

  44. Tonie
    Hope your DD arrived safely and all well
    Sue
    How are you ,any improvement there,I hope so
    Well I managed to keep this agency and 24 hr care for my dad,with a contribution .but by the time he would have paid for cleaners and washing etc it’s not bad really..he went out in the buggy with this carer guiding him…so that’s good. And she’s really organising his tablets with the Dr. The Dr had them wrong they’d changed in hospital and she wasn’t going to let it go like that..this agency is also the most expensive ,but it shows.im happy with them.they seem very experienced.i was offered a cheaper one but ,you know,this seems good
    He seems to be getting a better life .
    Well all quiet here after DD went back.our last day .back for my breathing physio tomorrow ,inr test,and DD hearing aid is back.hope to stay a bit.i know I have a ten page contract to look at from this agency,ugh!
    Ok I’ll write later
    Chris

    • Chris, this all sound so good. I guess you really do get what you pay for and it sounds like the more expensive nursing at home crew is worth it. She sounds right on top of things. Is it still the young woman? I know if your Dad is happier then you are also happier. Good for both of you.
      I’m still dealing with the gastritis from the last chemo drug. Sat me on my tush,, it did. Went to the store on my own today and Jim came home from work to unload for me. I am blessed with such a dear, considerate much too hardworking man.
      Hope the breathing physio continues to help. I am looking into going to our hospital cardiopulmonary lab for working out each week. They have a great program and monitor you as you work out on their equipment. Need to gain strength. It’s a lot of hard work to stay upright as we age with all these disease, you know? Love, Sue

      • Sue
        What a nuisence the gastritis is still there ,but is it any easier? yea Jim certainly is a hard and loyal worker,you are indeed blessed
        Yes it is still the young girl there and will be for a while.i think they have two weeks on and a week off. Then another one for that week .but they always have the same two carers
        She was back and fore sorting out the Dr on the phone and to the surgery. I did ring to make sure they faxed the script to the chemist but she did all the rest.she is such a treat to have,
        My dad today questioned the price after it was agreed oh dear I thought he was changing his mind he said he thought it was thE price for a month not the week..I clearly said it more than once….I got a bit angry and said you’ll have to stop giving money to next door and her daughter!
        I know I shouldn’t ,but his food goes from his fridge so quickly and his freezer and he buys two handbags at a time from catalogues I found..well he don’t wear em!
        Also there these three £300 hoovers he bought one for himself but I know he bought next door one as a present..well ok..but the daughter as well!
        I bet they see a difference even now as I have got his card..he still goes thru the money tho..but it is his money ,but I’m on the case! But he can manage fine with his money to pay all for himself
        Back tomorrow and we have a garden tea party to attend at weekend to aid a charity.homemade cakes again..oh dear .more photos required I suspect
        Hope all ok and Donna made it back home fine

        Chris

    • Oh Chris, you are handling all of this so well…at least in my humble opinion. I think the details must be driving you mad at times but it sounds like you definitely did the right thing in taking over the bank end of things. I know his life has drastically changed and he just wants to be liked by the neighbor and be generous and all but oh my. So pleased you are there on the job. Sounds like the young woman worked out her differences with him and that is going better. She is very efficient and that’s great. As far as his memory, that probably comes and goes a bit. He probably remembers what he wants to to a certain degree. He’ll try to get around you, and I’m sure you know that. Bless him. This whole growing old package is not for cowards. I would imagine he is very glad to be home and doesn’t want to do anything to ruin that for himself. He was in hospital long enough to be truly sick of it. Just getting home and gaining his own atmosphere is good for him. Sometimes I think he’s playing with you, don’t you?
      Yes it’s a pain still dealing with the IBS/gastritis and all the more reason I seem to have developed a bit more patience this year. It has gone by quickly, but not. What I mean is it doesn’t seem possible It’s been 13 months since I ended radiation therapy yet I’ve been so nauseated on every pill they’ve given me for treatment that has slowed down time a bit. Still without a washing machine. Parts didn’t come again today from GE. Hauling only laundry that can’t wait to the basement. Going to be terribly expensive getting it fixed. You’d think a washer would last longer than 3.5 years, huh?
      So much on my mind right now that doesn’t seem important, just aggravating. Hang in there dear lady. Love, Sue

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