WHAT IS QUALITY OF LIFE?

photo credit: theberry.com

photo credit: theberry.com

This is a question and a term we often hear bandied about. “I just want her to have quality of life,” or “How am I going to maintain quality of life?” Especially, for those of us who have compromised health, this is a matter of great concern. It’s being used in a political sense these days as people are living longer and maintaining quality in their daily life is often more challenging than it was in times gone by when life expectancy was much shorter. You can be certain that a young pioneer woman who could only expect to live to the ripe old age of 37 didn’t give quality of life much thought. She was too busy trying to make it through daily life, feed her family, scrub her laundry on a scrub board in cold water and survive the various plagues and influenzas that came by on a regular basis. Survival was her primary goal.

 

I was surprised by the definition of the word quality because it can have so many meanings from class consciousness to excellence. It’s one of those phrases, quality of life, which we use so often when confronting any changes in our health or the health of someone we love. It may come as a surprise to some of the population to know that those of us who have pain everyday and live with chronic illness are already there. We already worry about how we are maintaining our quality of life right now, today.

 

For many of us who are no longer able to work, we have lost part of our family’s income and have had to make adjustments. When I first became ill, we had to adjust our grocery shopping, give up that new car we were used to buying every few years and postpone that trip we had been looking forward to taking. We felt the loss of occupation and career by allowing it to make us “less” in our own eyes and in the eyes of others. Eventually, we worked it out as we asked ourselves who we were. If we were no longer a nurse, a teacher, a banker or a business man or woman, then what was our identity? Our quality was threatened as we grappled with the “who” of us and wondered “who” we now were if we were no longer the old “who.”

 

For others, their quality or excellence of life has been affected by the loss of a spouse or companion who didn’t expect chaos to visit them and decided they couldn’t live with chronic illness. “In sickness and in health” are only words to some who do not know the depths of love and sacrifice that many others have discovered. One has to wonder if they ever think about the shoe being on the other foot. Tyler Perry made an interesting movie a few years ago called DIARY OF A MAD BLACK WOMAN. It brings up that very point as a young wife is thrown aside for a new, hotter model only to face her husband being injured and needing her before their divorce is finalized; and to see him jilted by his lover since he is now damaged goods. It’s worth watching if you’re interested in exploring the subject of loyalty in marriage when quality of life is threatened. It also has some hysterical moments in it thanks to Perry’s female alter ego who takes the form of his hilarious character, Madea.

 

Perhaps, the whole issue of our existence depends on the relativity of this whole subject, quality of life. Is it the end of the world if we lose our health? Some of us can testify that it is not. We may not have chosen the changes we’ve had to face, but we’ve survived and overcome. In many cases, we have actually surprised ourselves by our adjustments and adaptations. In most cases, our value system has shifted and changed. Those activities, possessions and accomplishments we once sought are now a thing of the past and we have embraced new values and goals. We are living proof of the ability of the human spirit to sink or swim, flee or fight as we face life’s sometimes overwhelming challenges. It’s still frightening at times as we contemplate the future and what it holds for us, just as it is a concern for healthy individuals. “Will I be able to maintain quality of life?”

 

For those of us who have already faced the threat and loss of the ordinary in our daily lives, we can probably agree to sum up our needs.

 

LOVE: The importance of giving and receiving love is what makes life worthwhile. Love in both directions is life-giving, purposeful and enjoyable.

 

INDEPENDENCE: Our independence becomes our greatest desire. When one cannot perform life’s simplest deeds for oneself, your self-worth suffers greatly. Independence takes many forms but for most of us it means staying in our own homes or environs, calling our own shots as to when, what, who and where. It doesn’t have to be grand; just ours.

 

FUNCTION: Most of us have figured out, in order to remain independent or to achieve our highest level of independence we have to be able to function. If the word in real estate is “location, location, location,” the word in disability is “function, function, function.” This creates an impetus in us to walk, swim, go through surgeries, and always seek the physicians who can help us achieve this goal. We learn the vital importance of moving, trudging on and remaining as strong as possible.

 

COMFORT: Like all living things, most animals and also the plant world, we long for comfort. Food, drink, a comfortable temperature and a place to lay our heads for rest is what we seek. This is no small feat for those of us who live with chronic pain. We have to find that place of comfort with our pain medications short of addiction. We have to discover our area of daily movement short of injury and we learn the delicate art of compromise in our needs for the material comforts of this world.  Many of us discover over the years that comfort comes not just from a down pillow or a warm coverlet alone but from the warmth and discovery of the depths of the human spirit, a loving friend and faith in the future.

 

HUMOR: Life is humorous, as we each have learned. Humor in all forms is helpful, healthful and life-giving. Whether we see it or feel it with the lick across the face of a loving pup, the clamor of a small child or watch it on TV or read something humorous, laughter is always available if we want it. Some days we have to go out of our way to find it but it is as vital as oxygen in our struggle with chronic pain.

 

Lastly, we grow and survive by giving quality of life to someone else. Have you seen on the news or read about the young man who owns a pizza parlor in Philadelphia? His name is Mason Wartman and his restaurant is Rosa’s Fresh Pizza. It all began, his sharing some quality of life, in 2013 when one of his customers noticed he served many homeless people and asked if he could help. The gentleman gave Mason an extra dollar and he pinned a note on the wall on a bulletin board that soon grew to hold over 500 Post-it notes. Each note represented a free slice of pizza for someone in need. Now, at least 18,000 free slices of pizza have been served in his establishment.

 

What does quality of life mean to you? I’m sure we each will come up with our own, individual answer. Here’s wishing you assistance on your search for that quality.

124 thoughts on “WHAT IS QUALITY OF LIFE?

    • Janet dear, Well good. Thinking is one of the best things we do, right? Hope you’re okay and not having too much pain. Hope it’s cooling off down where you are in southern Texas. Fall has definitely fallen here in the NW. Feels good Love, Sue

    • Hi Chris, Guess I’ll answer some your comments from the last one on here. I am sorry you’re still having problems with your Dad’s caregivers as it’s bad enough having problems with him but when they act up, gees. Hopefully your breathing and throat will continue to get better with the treatments.

      My trip into Portland yesterday was long and hard. We didn’t get home until quite late and saw all three doctors. We both had biopsies. Isn’t that special…but we didn’t get a family rate. Doesn’t seem right somehow. Got my infusion of Zometa for osteoporosis and went on to the rheumatologist from there. My back was killing me all day and no one seems able to give me any solutions for that. Absolutely beat today and taking it easy. Jim was also exhausted with such a long trip and day. I’m now anxiously awaiting the washer repairman in about a half hour. Part is finally in.

      Yes, indeed, we all have questions all the time about quality of life not only for ourselves but for our loved ones, also. Sometimes we have to work pretty hard at it, I know as do you. Love, Sue

      • Sue
        Both had biopsies…? DH with his moles? And yourself?
        You must both be so worn out
        And now the repair man to add to it.i hope he fixed it
        Well I had the carer on the phone today and she was mad at dad..she was up all nite with him wanting to go to the bathroom with no success and she hadn’t had a break. So she told him she was going for a rest and was he ok.then she heard a noise and he got up and somehow got out of the chair to outside his door to sit down …..he’d also played up In town.you can’t tell him anything.he will do what he wants…
        So it’s going on well with both of them…I think a change will be good for both if them
        Well I hope today will sort out the washer and you can get all done
        I was thinking isn’t it good that we all have our hobbies,crafts and passions so those now fill those spaces left empty
        Chris

      • SUE….OH MY WHAT A TRIP, YOU MUST BE EXHAUSTED….AND NO FAMILY RATE? THAT’S A BIT OFF ISN’T IT? FINALLY THE WASHER PART IS IN, I HATED YOU TRUDGING DOWN THOSE STEPS, AND WORRIED ABOUT IT, SO THAT’S ONE THING LESS TO THINK ABOUT.
        I LIKE THE “COMFORT” PART OF THIS GREAT BLOG, I WOULD RATHER HAVE A PAIR OF LOVING ARMS O BE IN THAN A PAIN KILLER ANY DAY, BUT ITS AN UNFORTUNATE FACT THAT WE ALL SEEM TO NEED BOTH.
        I HOPE YOUR REST DAY IS BENEFICIAL FOR YOU DEAR FRIEND, ITS A LOT FOR YOU TO GO THROUGH IN ONE DAY…JIM TOO……..THINKING OF YOU………………….LOVE JEN X

  1. Your blog my friend could have been written by me ,too. After an accident , and several surgeries, I was left for a healthier younger version. I was too weak to fight and moved from a mansion on a hill in with my parents, children in tow… His new wife died a few years latter of breast cancer. He then developed a brain tumor and passed away this year. I offered him forgiveness, but I did not forget being called a cast off, a physical failure…. It has taken me many years to regain my self esteem and know I am a worthy of love, scars and all. I thank you for this post ! It hit home and send my best to you and yours , love , jo.

  2. Dear Friends, Too exhausted from the trip into Portland yesterday to write everyone just now but will fill you in. Hope Tonie is having a wonderful beachy time at the coast. Lyn, how sad about that shooter of the young mother. Those restraining orders aren’t worth the paper they’re issued on unless the person is afraid of jail. Sounds like he was too far into his mania to be stopped. How awful for her little ones and her family and his for that matter.
    Jenny, hope you’re seeing your osteo guy and getting some relief for the neck, etc. Hope Sacha is much better now. Jo, talked to the rheumy about the laxative you recommended and I’ve decided to try it again after 6 years since last. Hope your sitter is behaving a bit. Mine is shot from yesterday.Chris, we’ve chatted above.
    Long day yesterday, 12 hours of traveling and doctors. They’re great when you need them, just wish we were closer. I’ve been developing these nodules, which we think are from the radiation treatment. Have about a dozen of them now. The dermy took off one on my abdomen yesterday and will send it as biopsy. He said he thought they were cysts so I won’t worry. Have a few stitches to tend now. Went over to oncology and was examined by a new doc who is filling in for mine as he went to his daughter’s wedding. She thought I should take the oral chem but was not pushy when I told her I wasn’t that fond of barfing. When she mentioned every other day, I told her she might as well tell me to take arsenic every other day. She laughed and said at one time they used small doses of it for leukemia patients. Then had lab and went into large chemo room full of recliners and had my infusion of Zometa for the osteoporosis. Then rushed on down to the rheumy. Had much to talk about but little to be done. I am going to need a swallowing evaluation due to tightening in my throat and a couple of choking spells. Probably from the radiation therapy.

    I told Jim the other night, “I am falling apart before your eyes.” He responded, “Well, as long as I don’t find George gnawing on one of your bones I won’t worry too much.” That’s my guy. He took vacation time this week. So nice to have him around. Very tired today, both of us. Jim had to also have a biopsy for a suspicious spot. Hopefully the family that goes to the doctor together stays alive longer? Love to each of you. Love, Sue

    • Sue, I know those trips always take it out of you. I imagine both of you are beyond whipped. I know even small procedures like a biopsy can send me into fatigue and such, your trip was so much more. Glad Jim actually took some time off this week! He usually has interesting suspicious spots… I hope this one is nothing. 🙂
      The shooter I told all about did die yesterday. Probably for the best all around. Today he was scheduled for a hearing re: assault charges (he must have assaulted the lady he killed). I sure hope her teenage sons are on good terms with their father. Nothing was mentioned anywhere about a father, but they are sure going to need someone now.
      It was SO hot here yesterday and today. Tomorrow we are to get rain, maybe storming, and temps are to only reach 70 – 92 the last two days. I imagine I could end up feeling it tomorrow. Luckily, I don’t have much on my agenda for the day, just a Board meeting in the evening.

      Take care, everyone! Chris, I sure hope you can get your dad sorted soon. So much upset.

      • Lyn, Pleased you got something out of the blog. Hope the change in weather sits well with you but just having it cool off must help a bit. Yes, shooting someone is assault. Any act of violence perpetrated against another without their consent is assault. Nurses and doctors can even be charged with assault by performing a procedure without permission. Probably best that troubled man died. Harsh but really…what kind of love was that supposed to be. Love is kind of like poor old God…gets blamed for everything. Take care of you. Love, Sue

      • Sorry for the confusion, the hearing was for an assault he committed on her in 2014. I imagine the impending court appearance may have spurred his attack and consequent murder of her.

  3. Sue:
    GREAT read. Got me thinking….hmmm. I am SO tired, but have had a wonderful time. Leaving for home in the morning. I got up at dawn this morning, grabbed me coffee, and drove over to the beach to watch the sunrise. When I came back, it started raining and we had a nice thunderstorm. So I had some rest. But we have walked (the boys and I ) on the beach a lot today. i got cleaned up and took me out to dinner tonight. Went to a local owned seafood grill. Oh MY !! I will come back there I can tell you that. Had my She-crab soup, and that was yumy enough , Then I had flounder Cagney. It was awesome. Big flaky piece of flounder baked over a bed of tomatoes, topped with parmesan cheese and sugar snap peas. Had to bring part back with me THen the boys “took ” me to see the sunset at the beach. Now I am very tired and my back hurts so much. I have ignored it cause I wanted to do what I did.
    Oh well, long drive tomorrow. Gotta get to sleep. Love you all
    Tonie

    • Tonie, okay, now that is just too much. Your dinner sounds so wonderful and I just ate a cheese sandwich for dinner. Seriously though, it sounds like a great recipe and a wonderful place to visit again. Hope you got some rest and peace from your quick trip to the coast and hope the kids have found a house to move to. They need to spread out. Glad the dogs walked you so much and hope they didn’t force you to overdo it. Glad this blog caused thoughts to be stirred. I’m still whipped after yesterday. Later, Let us know when you get home safely. Love ya, Sue

      • Sue: (and all)
        I made it home safely. Ran into quite a bit of rain off an on, with some nasty looking skies. In lower NC> Extremely hot down there, now I know why they like coming up here to the mtns to visit. Put everything away, laundry done, showered and almost dozing off !
        Yes, Sue, we walked too much. All three of us were sore and tired today. No house yet, so ya’all pray they can find one. Most or 2 or 3 bedroom and they need 4 or 5. I will definitely go back to that place when I go .back. They didn’t open til after 4 or I would have grabbed lunch there before I left.
        Hope you are feeling better tonight Sue.
        Love
        Tonie

  4. Hi Sue..another great blog. The last question you posed has left me thinking….we do have to m a ke the effort to find the quality in our lives. It’s the little things for me I am learning like sunrises and sunsets, my little dog, the birds singing and spending time with loved ones even if it’s just a phone call.

    I hope you are recovering from your trip . A 12 hour day is a LONG day between traveling and 3 appts. My sitter and back would be screaming if that was me. It’s always a problem .. everyday! Sue, have you been to a psin management dr. for your spine?

    I am glad you will be trying Miralax again. It works gently but well. Also the Calm Magnesium powdered drink works well also.

    • Jo, good to hear from you as ever. Yes, it is often a question of searching to find what we can do as our lives continually change. I know for me it has been an endless quest. Each day seems to bring new challenges, I won’t really call them problems, but as we age with all these issues they do become so tiresome.
      Yes, my rheumy pointed out to me that the last time I took Miralax was right after I had had abdominal surgery and I was taking lots of heavy pain meds and that might be why I didn’t like it. Believe it or not she told me her 18 year old cat has digestive issues and chronic constipation and the vet recommended it for her and it has helped the cat tremendously.
      I hesitate to bad mouth any profession but simply do not have a good opinion about pain specialist. I am considering seeing a spinal specialist but not another pain specialist. Most of them are anesthesiologists, which means they’ve mostly seen patients who are asleep and they always want to push the drugs. I know what I can and cannot tolerate and would just be argumentative.
      Hope you are entering a period of cooling with the weather and are doing as well as you can dear lady. Love, Sue

      • Sue, I am sorry to hear how badly t h e Miralax affected you. It sounds pretty severe. Was that just from taking one dose? I never had any cramping with it. But i don’t have IBS like you do. Im sure thst must be why. I guess we never know how things will affect us till we give it a try. I sure hope and pray you will feel better soon. Take care, Jo

  5. GOT TO THE COAST……SACHA ON THE BEACH AND HIS LEG GAVE WAY….WAS AFRAID AT FIRST, BUT HE SOON RECOVERED, FIND MYSELF WATCHING HIM ALL THE TIME NOW………….LOVELY DAY, IT WILL BE PAYBACK TIME TOMORROW, BUT DON’T CARE….YES SUE I SAW MY OSTEOPATH YESTERDAY, I COULDN’T HAVE GONE WITHOUT HIS HELP.

    TONIE……I AM LOVING HEARING ABOUT YOUR TRIP, ITS DOING YOU GOOD, AND SUCH A NICE WAY TO GET TIRED.

    CHRIS…HOPE ALL IS WELL NOW WITH YOUR DAD AND WITH YOUR DH’S B/P, HOW ARE YOU FEELING, STILL GOT THE EYE AND BREATHING PROBLEMS? HOPE THINGS ARE IMPROVING LOVE, AND YOU ARE ABLE TO GET SOME REST TOO.

    LOVE TO ALL……………………………JENNIE XX

  6. TOMORROW IS A REMEMBRANCE DAY FOR US ALL ESPECIALLY YOU GUYS, SO FOR 9/11 MY FELLOW BRITS AND US HERE WILL BE THINKING BACK AND REMEMBERING ALL OF THOSE WHO HAVE SUFFERED………………JENNIE XXXXXXXXXXXX

    • Thanks Jennie. We must never forget. Hard to believe its 14 years . It seems like yesterday to me. I vividly remember hearing on t.v. about the first plane flying into the tower while getting ready for work. And as soon as i got to work, the courthouse I worked in had a bomb threat called in and everyone had to evacuate the building and we were not allowed into the parking garage to get our cars. So I spent the whole day outside in Phoenix in September (107°) till 7 p.m.looking up at the sky every time I heard a plane fly over. Such a frightening time for us all. XXX

      • Hi Sis…….Lordy, that must have been scarey, yes it is hard to believe its been fourteen years, my DH and I were in a hotel at the time, and I just sat on the bed and cried, couldn’t believe what was happening. I don’t think anyone involved or just being anywhere close, will ever get over it……it was like the whole world was watching…………………….xxJen xx

    • Yes Jennie, it is a sad memorial day for so many around the world. Then again, we must never forget and always be vigilant but many of us in this country feel like we need new leaders who are more vigilant than the ones we have now.
      So glad you got to the coast. I’m sure the sand was a bit of a challenge for Sacha’s leg. Hope you all had a good time. Your pics you shared were beautiful but you looked so somber I wasn’t sure if you were having fun or not.
      I’m continuing to recover from the trip we had and hoping to never have to see another doctor for quite awhile. If only…
      Do take care and glad to hear your osteo is back. Love, Sue

  7. GOOD MORNING. SUE THAT BLOG REALLY HIT HOME WITH ME. I HAVE HAD LOTS OF TROUBLE WITH WHO I AM SINCE I’VE STOPPED WORKING. STARTING TO ACCEPT IT BUT IT’S TAKEN ME QUITE A LONG TIME. MY FAMILY ALSO HAD TROUBLE ACCEPTING THAT I WAS NO LONGER THE SAME PERSON I USE TO BE. PAIN CHANGES YOU. MY DD AND ONE OF MY SONS HAVE FINALLY COME AROUND AND UNDERSTAND THE PAIN I’M IN. THE YOUNGEST ONE STILL THINKS ALL IS WELL.
    WHAT A DAY YOU AND JIM WENT THROUGH. HAPPY HE HAD TIME OFF ALSO. DO TAKE GOOD CARE OF EACH OTHER.
    LOVE REALLY IS WHAT KEEPS US GOING ISN’T IT.
    THINKING OF ALL OF YOU TODAY SEPT 11TH. GOD BLESS AMERICA.
    CHRIS HOPE THINGS GET BETTER WITH YOUR DAD BUT I HAVE A FEELING THINGS WILL STAY THE SAME, JUST LIKE MY AUNT.
    JANET, ALWAYS NICE TO HEAR FROM YOU. I HOPE YOU ARE HAPPY WHERE YOU ARE AND HAVE SETTLED IN.
    JENNIE POO ENJOYED YOUR PICS. I BELIEVE THAT IS WHAT I MISS THE MOST. WE HAVEN’T SEEN THE OCEAN IN 4 YEARS.
    TONIE I TOO HAVE BEEN ENJOYING YOUR TRIP WITH YOU. THAT SUPPER CERTAINLY SOUNDED FABULOUS. YUMMMY.
    JO, I ALSO TAKE MIRALAX AND IT DOES WORKS GENTLY. HOPE YOU ARE HAVING LOW PAIN DAYS MY FRIEND.
    WELL ENOUGH FOR NOW.
    GOD BLESS YOU ALL.
    LOVE TO ALL ON THE BLOG. XXX

    • Suzanne…God bless you and everyone here, too. I hope your days have been low pain too. Good to hear from you. I miss seeing you all on Facebook.
      Love Ya, Jo. XX

    • Suzanne, you make a good point. When we have to change and are searching for a quality of some type in our lives, we are not the only ones changing but indeed, our whole family has to adjust. Some do it better and more quickly than others. I truthfully think it’s tiring for everyone…not just us.
      Certain you are enjoying your garden. Fondly, Sue

      • SUE I AM LOVING MY GARDEN THIS YEAR. IT REALLY HAS KEPT ME SANE. ALREADY THINKING OF NEXT YEAR.
        LOVE YOU MY DEAR FRIEND.
        XXX

  8. Tonie,, glad to hear you got home and had such a lovely break. I love rain at the beach personally. Yes, I pray the kids find a new home to move to and quickly. A four bedroom would be wonderful, wouldn’t it? Hope your cold is now gone. Still resting up on this end of the country. Love, Sue

  9. Hi all
    Lovely sunshine here today?but rain tomorrow
    Jo did you get the results of all those scans you had?
    Suzanne yea I think your right about my dad..good to hear you
    Sue
    I must admit I don’t get much joy from the pain clinics .only more pain
    Chris

    • Chris, I’ll find out all my results on Monday morning when I go back to neurologist. I hate the waiting. Thank you for asking. I hope your sacrum is doing better? I know how awful it can be when it acts up. Hard to sit, bend, do anything! . Mine acts up all the time and probably always will:(
      Have yourself a good weekend!
      Jo

  10. Jo
    Yes the waiting is the worst. My thoughts are with you.. I do wish we could find out results without all this waiting ,
    Tonie
    Hope you have rested .what a good time you had .
    Jen
    Yep still got all my probs.whatever I do there they are!
    Sue
    How’s that washer…also how’s all the garden work you had done …the wall and tiling
    Well it’s early here..I’m awake ands it’s 6.30 a shop is open so I’m gonna get in car and get a newspaper come back and have some toast…got a photo exib. and a painting studio to visit today
    Should be good.raining and dull out but should be better later
    Chris

    • Hi Chris, the tile work has been completed for awhile. The washer is doing well now…hope that new computer board is a good one. I like the sounds of your morning. Have a good one.
      Tried Miralax laxative two days ago and have had severe cramping ever since. Then I noticed today it says in tiny print on the side of the bottle it is not to be used with IBS. Great. Love, Sue

      • Oh no sue..how are you now……I do hope it stops now and no worse. Do I remember that you can’t take anything for ibs either….it’s a wonder that no one pointed that out for you at hosp.heat is perhaps the only thing…..
        We had a good day back sore tho….
        Chris

  11. HELLO……..STILL TRYING TO GET OVER THE TRIP TO THE COAST, BONES ACHING ETC, YOU ALL KNOW HOW IT GOES, WE HAVE A LITTLE FUN, THEN WE PAY FOR IT…….STILL SO LONG AS WE GET THE FUN HUH?
    TRYING TO BE GOOD TODAY, BEEN EMOTIONAL EATING FOR TWO DAYS, GOT TO GET A GRIP ON THINGS OR I WILL END UP BEING A PORKER……..NOT HAVING THAT.
    WELL I HOPE 9/11 WAS NOT TOO STRESSFUL FOR EVERYONE, IT NEVER GOES AWAY DOES IT, EVEN AFTER FOURTEEN YEARS.

    JO……..I HATE THE WAITING TOO, LIKE CHRIS SAID, ITS THE WORST BIT, BUT HAVE COURAGE AND KNOW WE ARE ALL WITH YOU.

    CHRIS….HOPE THE RAIN DOESN’T SPOIL YOUR WEEKEND, WE HAD IT RIGHT THROUGH THE NIGHT, BUT NOW ITS SUNNY AND WARM AGAIN, SO I AM BLOWING IT OVER TO YOU……GET THE SUN LOUNGER OUT.

    SUE…..HAVE YOU RECOVERED FROM YOUR PORTLAND TRIP YET……………I KNOW IT TAKES A LONG TIME, BUT HOPEFULLY YOU CAN HAVE A RESTFUL WEEKEND, THINKING OF YOU AS ALWAYS…………..

    TONIE…GLAD YOU GOT HOME SAFE, AND THE REST DID YOU GOOD, AND BLEW THAT BAD COLD AWAY.

    BON WEEKEND TO EVERYONE….TAKE CARE OF YOURSELVES……………..LOVE JENNIE XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

    • Jennie, You’re right. We always pay quite a price for fun and even doctor visits. I am getting there but having a bad time with gut from the Miralax. Been cramping and going for two days. Read what I wrote Chris. Rest up dear girl. Loved all your beach pics. Love, Sue

  12. Jo and Chris, Yep. Right there on the label under warnings it mentioned IBS. I don’t think my rheumy probably gave it a thought because it isn’t her specialty. I took two doses and went all day yesterday and today, every few mins. Will take none tonight. I guess that’s how we learn. Just kind of shot my weekend. Thanks to both of you for asking. Love, Sue

    • HI SUE……………..OH MY, THAT IS SO NOT FAIR, YOU TAKE MEDICINE TO HELP WITH ONE THING, AND END UP WITH ANOTHER, I KNOW I KEEP SAYING IT, BUT IF I WIN THE LOTTERY, I AM GOING TO BUY US AN EXCLUSIVE SPA WITH ALL THE MEDICAL TREATMENT WE NEED AS INDIVIDUALS, WITH PROPER STAFF, DOCTOR’S EVERYTHING WE NEED TO MAKE LIFE BETTER FOR US………………AS MARTIN LUTHER KING SAID….”I HAVE A DREAM”…………………………………….WISHING BETTER DAYS FOR YOU MY FRIEND, LOVE JEN XX

      • JENNIE..LOVE YOUR SPA IDEA ON MANY LEVELS…BEING WITH FRIENDS WHO UNDERSTAND EACHOTHER’S STRUGGLES AND HAVING MEDICAL CARE COME TO US. GREAT DREAM!!! GOTTA WIN THAT LOTTERY!!! I THINK I’LL START PLAYING AGAIN. XX

        SUZANNE…I’M DOING OKAY…YOU KNOW ABOUT THE USUAL:) HOW HAVE YOU BEEN? YOU DONT REALLY SAY . I HOPE YOU’RE DOING BETTER PAIN-WISE. HAPPY SUNDAY TO YOU MY FRIEND. XX

        HAPPY AND R ELAXING SUNDAY TO ALL!

  13. HAPPY SUNDAY TO ALL. IT IS RAINING CATS AND DOGS HERE TODAY. SUE SO SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT ALL THOSE CRAMPS. NOT GOOD. I’VE NEVER FELT THAT WHEN I TAKE MIRALAX. SORRY IT HAD TO HAPPEN TO YOU, AFTER ALL YOU HAVE BEEN THROUGH IN THE LAST LITTLE BIT OF TIME. HOPE IT STOPS TODAY.
    JENNIE POO, WOULDN’T THAT BE FUN! A SPA THAT ALL OF US COULD GET TOGETHER AND ACTUALLY MEET ONE ANOTHER. I’M SURE WE WOULD BE LAUGHING QUITE A BIT, BUT ALSO GETTING PROPER ATTENTION FOR OUR BODIES.
    I JOIN YOU IN YOUR DREAM.
    LOVE YOU JANET, WONDERING HOW YOUR DAY IS GOING, VERY HOT STILL?
    LYN THINKING OF YOU OFTEN, HOPE THINGS HAVE SETTLED DOWN FOR YOU ALSO.
    TONIE, HOW IS IT GOING SWEET PEA?
    JO, WONDER IF YOU ARE FEELING OKAY TODAY. HOPE IT IS A LOW PAIN DAY FOR YOU.
    CHRIS, HOPE YOU ARE ENJOYING THE SHED, IF THAT IS WHERE YOU ARE. TROUBLE KEEPING UP WITH YOU. YOU ARE SO BUSY WITH MANY DIFFERENT THINGS.
    LOVE TO ALL. GOD BLESS YOU ALL WHO ARE ON THE BLOG.
    XXX

    • Hi, Suzanne! I am enjoying a quiet weekend. I’m listening to my body, but will have to push it a bit today to make sure some basic cleaning, etc. is done. Mostly fatigue. I think the rain is done for us this weekend and it looks like we are to have a cooler day – the high around 68, I think? Of course, it is not to last 75 Mon, then low to mid 80’s through the week, but no rain, so I’ll take it. Except we could probably use the rain… Oh well. Good hearing from you. 🙂

  14. Oh dear
    My dad and the carer
    She was going to church with him..she doesn’t know the town
    They were late getting going with as he is
    He rushed off on the scooter..she is a large lady and couldn’t catch up
    He was carrying her handbag ,that’s where she put it,on the scooter.
    He just dumped it for her to run after it and sped on.she went to three different churches looking for him
    She had to come home all flustered and worried
    AlSo he went shopping as well on his own he was ages coming back and bought shopping there is no room for. Oh dear that poor lady. No one knew where he was
    Well tomorrow they are changing careers she said..so we’ll see who they put there
    She left a message with the agency today
    Oh dear and we had a great morning without knowing all that
    A couple asked us over for coffee this morning and we nattered for ages!
    So have to talk to my dad later as he was out having coffee with his ladies when I rang..he’ll prob. blame her!
    Ok folks back later
    Chris

    • CHRIS…………….YOUR DAD IS TESTING YOUR PATIENCE TO THE BLOOMING LIMIT NOW, BY THE TIME HE HAS FINISHED, THERE WILL BE NO-ONE WILLING TO TAKE HIM ON…….THEN IT WILL COME RIGHT BACK AT YOU…..AGAIN.
      I AM SO GLAD YOU DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT THIS LATEST EPISODE, UNTIL YOU HAD GOT BACK FROM ENJOYING COFFEE AND A GOSSIP WITH YOUR FRIENDS, OTHERWISE HE WOULD HAVE RUINED EVEN THAT SMALL PLEASURE FOR YOU TOO……SORRY TO SOUND HARSH, BUT ITS YOU AND YOUR DH I AM THINKING OF RIGHT NOW……………………………TRY NOT TO GET HET UP ABOUT IT LOVE, BUT ITS UNFAIR……..LOVE JEN X

  15. Well I spoke to my dad and he says he didn’t want to go to church with her so he did that so he would lose her…… !
    Words fail me.. Poor lady was in and out of three churches asking for him and I expect they were in the middle of a service and it made it embarrassing for her
    And to just dump her bag so she had to run for it
    Can’t say anymore
    He has a new carer tomorrow..
    Going to bed..back home tomorrow .not going around to my dads for a few days .he can meet the new carer on his own.i usually go round to meet them..but Im Just past it for now
    Hope all had a reasonable w.end
    Thinking of you for tomorrow Jo
    Yea Jen he’s certainly testing me at the moment….but am feeling a step back from it after chatting to others about other stuff …I think!
    Chris

    • Chris, It’s a blessing that you’ve been able to gain some perspective on the situation with your Dad. Life is too wonderful to always be dealing with this problem which is obviously not going to go away. He can be a very ruthless person so you must protect yourself. I think it’s great that you are letting him face the new caregiver by himself.
      I’m so pleased you got away and had some fun for awhile. When this falls into your lap again, maybe you’ll be able to give him some ultimatums this time. He certainly is not afraid of making a mess of things. That poor caregiver. I agree with Jen that he’s going to burn his bridges very soon and no one will want him and it will be the rest home for him. Sweet friend, you’ve been way back for him and been more than anyone should have a right to expect. Now you be good to you and DH.
      Jim and I just back from a grocery trip and stopped at SIL’s store to buy a new ceiling fan for the kitchen. Have a light fixture burn out in there and thought a pretty fan and light would be good. Later dear, Love, Sue

    • Thanks, Chris. I hope things settle down with your dad. Such good advice from Sue and Jen. I’m sure it is much easier said than done. But I’m glad you had some time this weekend to enjoy yourself. I am starting to have similar problems with my mom. She is passing money out to anyone that gives her a sob story and giving her caregiver a hard time about everything.. So, a trip to Chicago is in my near future.
      Take care of yourself..
      Jo

      • Jo, I’m so sorry to hear conditions seem to be accelerating with your Mom. It must be frustrating to be so far away from her. I’m sorry to think of you having to make that trip with your pain but know you eventually must. Life can have such painful moments, and they aren’t limited to our bodies, huh? Thinking of you. Courage my dear. Love you, Sue

  16. Yep ..yep..you are right there sue..looking forward to coming back here after about a week.i got another history talk I want to go to at home
    Taken some strong painkillers tonite but will prob be constipated ,but it’s balancing one thing with another …..as you know
    At least it will put me to sleep!
    How’s your tum sue?
    DH bp seems ok
    That fan will be good for next summer too
    Well gonna switch off soon and let meds do their bit.
    Chris

    • Chris, Hope you slept well and your pain is lessened this AM. It’s just afternoon here and cold and windy. Called an electrician to come out and install fan sometime soon…I hope. Jim isn’t into doing that sort of thing. We chose a lovely one with oak blades and four white glass lights to give plenty of light. Think the fan aspect will come in handy.
      Hope you’re having an enjoyable time and sorry to hear about so much pain. Did you have fun getting it? Hope so. Love, Sue

  17. HELLO……………..

    JUST HAD A MEGA STORM, WOW, ALL HAPPENED IN TEN MINUTES FLAT, NOW ITS JUST GONE……….SEEMS AUTUMN IS EARLY THIS YEAR, ALREADY THE LEAVES ARE FALLING AND TURNING TO GOLD………….
    GOT THE DRATTED NEURALGIA TODAY….GIVING ME GIP……!!!!!

    CHRIS…………..I HOPE YOU ARE ABLE TO STAND BACK FROM THE THINGS YOU DAD IS GETTING UP TO, AND LETTING SOMEONE ELSE TAKE UP THE SLACK………………I TOTALLY AGREE WITH JO, EASIER SAID THAN DONE, BUT ITS ABOUT BEING STRONG AND GAINING SOME CONTROL FOR YOURSELF.

    JO………………YOU ALREADY KNOW I AM THINKING OF YOU TODAY, AND WILL CATCH UP LATER, BE BRAVE LOVE.

    SUE………A PRETTY FAN SOUNDS NICE, AND AS CHRIS SAID, IT WILL BE HANDY FOR NEXT SUMMER.
    I HOPE YOUR POOR TUMMY HAS SETTLED DOWN A BIT BY NOW.

    WELL, I HOPE ALL IS WELL FOR EVERYONE TODAY, TAKE CARE OF YOURSELVES………….MUCH LOVE….JENNIE XX

    • Jennie, Wow, what a storm. Yes, we’re having Fall as well. Just had the yard guy out to prune and clean up out here. It’s amazing how fast things can grow. We have morning glories that came over to visit from the neighbors and have taken hold. I keep expecting one of those vines to knock on the door they’re so aggressive. It was funny because he had a guy with him who asked about Jim. He kept telling me what a nice guy he is. Obviously he has been in jail and thought the world of my husband, the nurse. So funny. He didn’t seem a bit embarrassed about having been in jail. I’m always telling Jim he has the most interesting friends.
      Hope Sacha and you are both feeling okay. Love you, Sue

  18. Good morning my peeps !
    Been catching up. Yesterday was the church picnic, and it was so cold !! We voted to have it in August next year. Everyone is gone this morning and I hear the clock ticking. It is trying to put me back to sleep. But I must get up and get going. I have things to do today. Maybe a nice nap later ?
    Had the Dr call me in some prednesone , and must go pick it up and go to the grocery and getg a few things. UGH ! I hate shopping. Must needs to get back and finish teh underpenning as well. Back to work tomorrow. It has been really cool the last few days, like fall came overnight ! I will miss my capri’s and tank tops 🙂 I can feel my tan fading as we speak !!
    Chris, dear girl, sounds like you need to give dear old dad a tough love lesson. Take away his scooter rights for a bit.
    Well I must be off.
    Prayers for you all
    Love
    Tonie

    • TONIE……FUNNY THAT WE HAVE THE SAME AS YOU, AUTUMN JUST SEEMED TO HAPPEN WHEN WE WERE NOT LOOKING………………ARE YOU GETTING BACK IN THE SWING OF THINGS AFTER YOUR TRIP? I AM PUTTING AWAY LOTS OF SUMMER CLOTHES, I CAN’T BRING MYSELF TO DRAG OUT THE WINTER WOOLIES YET THOUGH CAN YOU? HOW ARE THE HORSES,? YOU BACK TO RIDING THEM AGAIN, OR IS THAT ON HOLD FOR A BIT?……………….TAKE CARE AND GOD BLESS……………..JENNIE XX

      • Jennie:
        I haven’t ridden in a few weeks , been either too busy or was waiting on Red;s leg to heal. I am thinking of getting some time in on the weekend. We are going to see if Red can tolerate some shoes. I want to ride him on out in the woods some, but he needs shoes first.
        I know, getting the winter clothes out is a bit of a shock ain’t it ?? Had to pull out a hoodie this morning. Sun goes down, it get cold.
        You take care
        Love
        Tonie

    • Tonie, Sorry the church picnic was so chilly. Indeed, we all seem to be experiencing an early Fall. Never know out here if it’s here to stay or not. Get tired of taking the air conditioner in and out of the window…hot, then it rains.
      Hope the children are in school and Nikki and friend are out looking for a home. Pray all is well with all the family. Quiet out here. Very cold today with rain pending. Same old same old with my health. This may be as good as it gets and I’ll settle just wish I could shake some of the spinal pain. Recovered from long trip to Portland last week and three bad days after trying Miralax. It just isn’t right for me or many IBS patients. I’m having a swallowing study done this week in radiology due to some problems swallowing since burnt esophagus due to radiology. It’s always something so trying to go with the flow. Love you as ever, Sue

      • Sue”
        I thought you told me some time ago you couldn’t take that, or was it some other brand ? I think of you so much and especially when my back is acting up. WHich it seems to be doing more of lately. And I am even behaving, But standing too long without sitting and sitting too long without standing, Both end up causing me so much pain.
        Yes, kids in school, all loving their new school. Nikki is out looking for a home, James is going to start a business, he is a plumber. We have been shopping for clothes for them all to acclimate to the weather. Of course kids being kids they had all outgrown their previous ones. Some got handed down and other bought. Seems the worst problem being had is finding everyone’s shoes in the morning .
        I am spending the night with Ms Alice on Thursday. All her invisible visitors are back.. I just play along and it seems to calm her. Her daughter doesn’t want to give up on telling her that they are not there. That upset her. No harm no foul, so I just don’t see getting her all upset over it. They are playing in a golf tourney and then going to VA Tech afterwards for dinner and hearing the Marine Band play. So I get an all day and overnight gig with a good payday. And some peace and quiet for a night !
        I pray for your strength to return everyday dear friend. Love you very much
        Tonie

  19. Jo
    Sorry to hear that your mum is getting to a similar position ,I do hope it won’t be too much like my dads
    The agency didn’t send a new carer today ,I think it mite somehow have something to do with what he did yesterday.not sure but it feels that way
    Hope today was ok for you
    Sue
    I like that saying ..did I have fun getting the pain..much better than doing work and getting it!
    The fan sounds nice…and I would be concerned as well if my dH were to attempt it
    And I can’t think really what caused my back…oh yea it was getting into the car stretched my legs to much to get over the muddy area to save the car !!
    Jen
    Had your storm thunder and stuff today
    Chris

    • Chris, Hope the strain in the back goes away with heat and rest. I can see not wanting to get mud on the floorboards. So, what did your Dad do today? Did the poor woman leave already who he did that trick on? Was he alone? That’s a scary thought and just asking for trouble but what can you do? He’s just setting himself up for trouble, poor man. I’m so happy for you that you are letting him see what his actions have brought about. I think of you so often and pray for you and DH as well as Dad to choose life over chaos. It sure can get complicated can’t it?
      Got our yard all cleaned up today…not me of course, but the nice Vietnamese yard guy. Getting ready for fall and winter. I have a wet dog sitting on me right now after a bath. Waiting for Jim to come home from work and feeling fair. Back hurts from dog bath but such is life. Needed to be done. Life keeps dragging us along. Thank God for the daily grind. Love, Sue

    • HI CHRIS……SORRY WE SENT THE STORM TO YOU…….ITS NOT BEEN THE BEST DAY HERE AGAIN, WRITTEN OFF GOOD WEATHER NOW, BUT HEARD TELL WE ARE DUE FOR ANOTHER MINI HEAT WAVE…HUH !! I’LL BELIEVE THAT WHEN I SEE IT.
      I SUPPOSE YOU ARE BACK HOME NOW? I HOPE THIS DOESN’T MEAN YOU ARE GOING TO GET STUCK IN THE MIDDLE OF MORE PROBLEMS WITH YOUR DAD……GLAD YOU GOT THE BILL THINGY SORTED OUT….HOW IS THE BACK TODAY?……………….LOVE JEN X

      • Jen
        Well back a bit better
        Had to get my dad some money so had to go over.but he did get a new carer and it’s a man
        But he says he’s good and he does seem it..so fingers crossed
        How’s your eyes?
        Ive been out trying to buy some boots..each year I go and nowt again…
        Not bad today but gives a storm for next two days
        Chrisx
        Oh wat u make of Dr foster I liked it when it got going and did you see doc Martin last nite?

  20. Well sue
    The carer was all ready to go and she got a phone call that she was staying. Don’t know anymore other than the agency rang for his address and he’ll know more by Wednesday.so I know on Sunday the carer left a message about dad on what happened Sunday. So I’m just wondering why the turnaround..perhaps they are thinking he is too much..but he is not happy. And I think it serves him right that he should be wondering himself. I haven’t said this to him ..but he is wondering and not happy.altho he says his food is still cold..but can’t understand why it could still be.but it is concerning.altho he doesn’t tell me it is..only when I ask…so I’m not sure
    When I speak to her she says she has tried all ways with him and tried to give him love she says and nothing works
    Altho I dont think the agency would want to lose the work….and she is still there and the atmosphere must be no good
    Feeling fair you said..is that good fair..I hope so
    Well it’s nearly 5 am try and go back to sleep.looking forward to doing nowt today.when we got back yesterday someone had used our address to send a bill to..so that took a long phone call to sort out..you know how it goes..and of course in DH name and he can’t hear on phone and they were awkward.but I had to deal with it..and I didn’t need trouble to find me! But all sorted now and I hope they find him

    Chris

    • Chris, here’s hoping the new caregiver will suit your Dad but keep in mind they can change the care people but they cannot change your Dad. Just take it a day at a time and live your own life. Lord, girl, you have enough challenges for many people.
      Electrician out this morning to install the new ceiling fan/light combo. I love it but it’s bright and now I can see all the dirt in the kitchen! Beginning to rain here with a mild breeze. George kept chasing the young electrician. He took his shoes off at the door and I think George liked to chase his socks. The guy was nice about it. Pleasant young man getting married this Saturday.
      Enjoy the history lecture and do take care. Hope DH’s B/P is staying down. Love you, Sue

  21. Yep sue DH bp seems to be good now
    He just needs to exercise now as do I really
    Yea it’s like when spring comes and you get to see it all……forget it ..you hear!!
    Huh that’s me talking …! Gotta get something done but I’m enjoying just reading and going out tho.so that’s that .can’t get around to anything at moment..but I will
    It must have looked funny little George chasing his socks
    How are you anyway you didn’t say?
    Over here they are forecasting a very cold winter ..I’ve gotta get some boots..my old ones have got holes in them…DH is Ashamed to be seen with me!
    Yep will leave my dad to it for a bit now..and hope it stays ok..but as you say he’s bound to come up with himself somehow
    Still on my diet and have lost 6 lbs my clothes seem loser so that cheers me up
    Love Chris

    • Chris, Oh dear, the dreaded shoe shopping again. I hate that, also. Wear wool socks and sandals on many cold days but socks too tight with my ankles. Good luck with that. Hope you find some you like that are comfortable for winter.
      glad DH is doing well. Exercising is so hard sometimes although I know we must.
      I am about as usual. Not much to say I haven’t said so many times before, I get tired of myself. Resting a pulled muscle in my right arm from the machines at cardio lab. DOn’t know if it’s going to work for me or not with all my other problems, joints, etc. Good thing I can set my own schedule. Later dear friend, Sue

      • SUE………I KNOW ITS HARD EXERCISING, BLOODY EXCRUCIATING IN FACT, BUT I FEEL PROUD OF MYSELF WHEN I HAVE DONE IT, I BET YOU DO TOO……….YOU WONDER AT TIMES, AS WE ALL DO, CAN I DO THIS,? WHY DO I BOTHER? AND IS IT WORTH IT? I THINK WE ALL KNOW THE ANSWER !! WE WOULD BE IN A WORSE STATE IF WE DIDN’T………………..YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN MORE THAN MOST MY FRIEND…..HOW COME SO MANY OF US HAVE FOOT PROBLEMS? I HOPE YOUR ARM IS BETTER SOON, AND YES I AGREE WITH YOU, IT IS GOOD YOU CAN SET YOUR OWN SCHEDULE……LITTLE AND OFTEN?????……REST UP LOVE AND TALK SOON….LOVE JEN X

    • Chris, I’m so proud of you for losing weight. That can be so difficult, I know. Good to hear DH is okay. As far as Dad, didn’t he have a male attendant a few weeks ago? Well, one can always hope but we all know he is unhappy with his current situation apart from the care givers. Hope he’s staying off the scooter for awhile.
      You asked how I am but the answer is much the same. Still haven’t received the biopsy results from last week, forced to take a bit of a break from cardio lab due to pulled muscle in my arm, gut better but back to same old constipation problems, etc. Some things just never change. Striving to maintain, stay upright and keep batting at problems.
      Hope you’re enjoying much reading and down time. Life keeps pulling us along doesn’t it? Love, Sue

      • Sue
        I wonder if those diabetic sweets with those sugar substitutes would work on you. It is even In chewing gum these days and sweets. I say this as I can’t have it as it gives me the runs ..but I wonder if you could just have the tiniest smallest ammount to see. Those sugarless polo mints have it in.
        Could you try just one sweet and see how it feels..perhaps you wouldn’t like to with how it’s been for you.i had to say just In case it was something you hadn’t tried
        Well when I’m hungry on the diet I just imagine myself fitting into my clothes ,at the moment that is working….it’s when you stay the same it gets tough
        My dad went on his scooter today with this carer ,but I think all is fine now with this man .he is very good..also he is a good cook! And my dad gets on with him…for how long I know is the thing…just take it as it comes for this week . I am going to live a normal week this week ..hec what’s that!!
        Oh dear I read your post to Jen,not good being pushed like that at the gym.would they not push so much knowing you’ve hurt yourself now.
        I hope you get these results this week now.how about DH is he still waiting as well
        Certainly a shame about the nurse leaving all that training gone to waste .more work for DH too now i suppose .
        Well my DD is trying to have a conversation texting me regarding my dad so I’d better get on with that.
        Awful weather here rain and rain.nice this morning tho
        Chris

  22. Tonie, So good to hear from you and get some updates from you. I can just envision in my mind all of you on a school morning getting ready looking for shoes. Sounds like the kids are doing well and I’m so happy for all of them for this start with a new life. Hope the house search is going well and think James starting a plumbing business sounds wonderful. So, you’re getting in a long stretch with Ms. Alice. Just don’t go through the looking glass with her. It can be a bit dicey when you’re alone with someone with dementia for any length of time. When I went to the hospital in San Fran. many years ago with my dear Dad, he had cerebral arteritis and got very dingy. The nurses sat up a cot for me in his room and would come and take me for walks to get me away from him sometimes. I’m glad you’re getting extra work with the holidays coming. Boy, how fun they will be this year, huh?

    No, or rather yes, you’re right. I did try Miralax several years ago after I had surgery and it didn’t work for me. My rheumy talked me into trying it again. She pointed out that I had just had surgery in 2008 and that might have been an unfair judgment. So, I tried it again. No more.
    Sounds like all of us except those in the northeast are having a chill in the air. We had rain today and a cold wind. Same old body here and same old problems. Still seeking and finding daily joy where I can along with you. Much love, Sue

  23. HI CHRIS….YES I SAW DR FOSTER, I THOUGHT IT WAS GREAT, I LOVE ALL OF SURANNE JONES’S STUFF….AND YES I LOVE WATCHING DOC MARTIN TOO, NICE TO SEE THE CORNISH BACKGROUND, I KNOW ITS PORT ISAAC, BUT ITS NOT FAR FROM WHERE THE KIDS LIVE.
    I AM GLAD YOUR DAD’S CARER IS A MALE, MAYBE NOT SO EASY TO MANIPULATE. MY EYES VARY CHRIS, BUT THEY ALWAYS FEEL SORE, ESPECIALLY THE SURROUNDING SKIN.
    HOPE YOU FIND SOME BOOTS, YOU ARE LIKE ME, NEVER FIND FOOTWEAR TO FIT THE VARIOUS FOOT PROBLEMS WE HAVE.
    WELL DONE WITH YOUR WEIGHT LOSS BY THE WAY…………LOVE JEN X

    • Hi Jennie, Found a reply space here in your remarks to Chris. Hope your weather is warming a bit. WHat a roller coaster ride of weather we have all had. Indeed, I agree with your remarks about exercise. The cardio lab is a bit more structured than I had hoped. I can come and go as I wish but they push you and this doesn’t always take into account all of the variables I have to deal with. That is my frustration at this point. Ii was talking about exercise yesterday with my twelve year old GS. He’s been working on his Mom’s Bo Flex machine and is so proud of how much he can pull to build his muscles. Awe to be young again.
      Cold and damp here today. I can always tell when George awakens me in the wee hours and wants to get into bed with us and always tries to steal my heating pad.
      I love to hear you and Chris talk about British TV. We often get the shows a few months after you do. Did you get the PBS special about Walt Disney? I DVR’d it and we look forward to watching it. Jim is still working too hard and now the other nurse at the jail, the one he’s been training for quite awhile has quit. Very disappointing. They’ll have to hire someone new now.
      How are your kids doing? Getting settled? Hope so. Love, Sue

      • HI SUE…….NO I AM AFRAID THE WEATHER IS ON THE TURN…BIT LIKE ME HA HA!! GOT TO HAVE FIRES ON IN THE DAY NOW, ITS ALL COME SO QUICK THIS YEAR. I HOPE YOU ARE MANAGING A STINT AT THE CENTRE WHEN YOU CAN, I DID ONE THIS MORNING, AND TWISTED MY KNEE, THAT WAS SO CARELESS OF ME, I COULD SPIT.
        I LOVE THAT WEE GEORGE WHEEDLES HIS WAY INTO YOUR BED, THE LITTLE RASCAL, HE LIKES HIS COMFORTS HUH? BUT HE LOVES HIS MOM AND DAD TOO.
        I AM SORRY TO HEAR JIM’S WORKLOAD HAS BEEN AFFECTED BY THIS OTHER NURSE QUITTING, IT MUST BE GALLING TO HAVE SPENT TIME TRAINING SOMEONE FOR NOTHING……BUMMER.
        I HOPE CHRIS AND I DISCUSSING UK PROGRAMS DOESN’T UPSET ANYONE, AND AS I KNOW HOW MUCH YOU ALL LIKE “DOWNTON” YOU ARE IN FOR A FEW SHOCKS IN THE FINAL SERIES STARTING HERE THIS WEEKEND…..LETS JUST SAY THERE WILL BE SOME SURPRISES, AND NOT WHAT YO WOULD EXPECT.
        THE KIDS ARE NOT HAVING MUCH SUCCESS WITH THE HOUSE AND ITS GONE BACK ON THE MARKET, THE YOUNG COUPLE WHO WERE GETTING A MORTGAGE, WERE TURNED DOWN BY THE BANK, SO BACK TO THE DRAWING BOARD SO TO SPEAK……………………….TAKE CARE OF YOU AND JIM…….LOVE AND GOD BLESS….JEN X

  24. Chris, Yes, Jim got his results and all is well with his biopsy. As far as your Dad, I’m pleased to hear he is getting on with the new man so well. That’s such good news. Being a good cook is such a plus for your Dad. Sorry it’s a bit dismal weather wise. Sun has come out here and there is a cool wind off the river.
    I think the cardio rehab lab is set up to build stamina in heart patients and they don’t really get into other problems. My rheumy asked me why I can’t just work out at home when I had to chat with her about my sore arm and shoulder. I like the machines but prefer them at my own pace. Well dear, onward and upward…plants to water, etc. Looking forward to the pre-Presidential debates on TV tonight…which we actually get in the afternoon. Don’t know why since they come from CA tonight, same time zone as us from the Reagan Presidential library. Love, Sue

  25. Good news about DH biopsy
    Bits of the debate were on TV over here
    Oh forgot to say..you can by a prune drink here that has that sweetener in it added to make it stronger. DH has it as the bp tablets make him constipated so much that one time his eye bled ( he’s on warfarin)
    Me well I just need a few sweets with it in by mistake and I’m on the way to IBS as I am now ..had some mints been bad for a few days…probably why I’ve lost some weight! So I’ve got to look at what’s in everything.drinks are the worst culprits .finding one with proper sugar in it.they are all these added sugarless ones and in turn they are so sweet
    Well gonna get up and start the day .surprise it’s sunny
    Chris

    • CHRIS….SORRY YOU ARE HAVING PROBLEMS WITH YOUR IBS AGAIN, BLOOMING HECK, WE ALWAYS HAVE SUMMAT TO DEAL WITH DON’T WE?
      WELL AT LEAST YOU HAVE SOME SUN, ITS HORRIBLE HERE, AND WE HAVE HAD THUNDER RUMBLING FOR TWO DAYS…….HOPE YOU SOON FEEL BETTER LOVE…..TAKE CARE…LOVE JEN X

      • Jennie, I love to hear about all British TV. You both give me some ideas about shows I have not watched. What is Doc Martin all about? So, I am so jealous. You have to keep us tweeked about Downton. I know you don’t want to spoil any surprises but we do look forward to getting it in a few months. Last season for that show and it will be missed.
        Indeed it is galling at work for Jim. It upsets me because it’s hard for him to get a day off now without a replacement. Hope they hire someone else very soon but Jim will have to train them. Some people!
        Sorry to hear how cold it is over there. Pretty chilly here. George has on his sweater and looks pretty cute. I just wish he could get up on the bed on his own. He whines and we pick him up. That’s his signal. He used to use the cedar chest and a small step but slipped on it once and is now shy of it. So funny. How’s Sacha doing?
        So sorry to hear the kids house deal fell through. Frustrating for them but surely someone else will come along. I hope it’s soon. Later, Love you, Sue

    • Chris, sorry I forgot to answer your suggestions about artificial sweeteners yesterday. I don’t eat anything with them in it. I think they’re bad for you and they always get my IBS going with cramping. I always avoid them, kind of like margarines and bad oils and try to stay with the more natural substances like butter. I always buy the Metamucil with sugar in it only. I do like prune juice for constipation but don’t take it often. I like a Welch’s cherry/white grape drink that works quite well with Colace. I am sorry to hear you’re having a bout of IBS again. It’s like Jennie said, we are always fighting something. That is life for so many of us.
      I’m having a swallowing study this morning so will need to get myself in gear to get to the hospital. Beth told me it’s no big deal so am not nervous. Just can’t eat anything for two hours before it. Wet and cold outside today although sunny. Strange how we can get that combination of weather. Hope you get to rest today. Love, Sue

      • Sue:
        Do you ever use Stevia at all ? I like it, use it in place of sugar because of calories, and I have grown to like it. You can bake with it as well. All natural, nothing aritifical. My SIL bakes with it for their diabetes and it is so good. She says you use less of it than sugar because it tends to dry out the bakes goods, but other than that it is good.
        Tonie

  26. Hope all went well sue with the swallow test
    I rang up a shoe repairer today ANd he mite be able to repair the whole rubber sole of my boots he will have to look at them as some he can’t
    I’m ashamed to take them in. But I mite get some more years out of them and no boot shopping!
    Look on dH face….!
    My dad is still happy with this carer and looks forward to his food..and wants him to stay..we shall have to see..as he is from another town
    DH doing a slide show of a village for the museum there..so that’s what we did today And ended up at Our tearoom after dH took photos and I waited there chatting
    Back later
    Chris

  27. MY DEAR BLOG FRIENDS, THIS IS A LARGE REQUEST FOR PRAYER. I FOUND OUT TODAY MY BREAST CANCER IS BACK. IT HAS CHOSEN TO APPEAR AS SMALL, NICKEL SIZED NODULES ALL OVER MY BODY. I HAD ONE BIOPSIED LAST WEEK AND SINCE CANCER IS SO INSIDIOUS, THIS IS HOW IT HAS CHOSEN TO REAPPEAR. I WILL SEE MY ONCOLOGIST IN PORTLAND MONDAY MORNING AND WE WILL WORK OUT A NEW PLAN. I KNOW, IT SUCKS BIG TIME BUT I HAVE TO SEE IT AS THE BEGINNING OF YET ANOTHER JOURNEY; AND I DON’T MEAN TO HEAVEN. I HAVE A FIGHT ON MY HANDS. I ASSUME THEY WILL WANT TO START CHEMOTHERAPY IV’S AND WE WILL GO FROM THERE. I WOULD ALSO IMAGINE WE WILL HAVE TO SUBMIT ME TO A FULL BODY MRI OR SCAN OR SOME SORT. WE WILL SEE. DOCTOR IS OFF TOMORROW SO MONDAY MORNING IT IS…TO PORTLAND.
    I’VE TALKED TO JIM AND BOTH OF MY KIDS AND WE’VE ALL CRIED. IT IS DISAPPOINTING AND THAT’S TO PUT IT MILDLY. PRAYERS PLEASE DEAR FRIEND. I LOVE EACH OF YOU. SUE

    • Oh, Sue, you will be in my nightly prayers. I am going to put your name in the Book for Prayers for Healing at my church and you will be  prayed for weekly. I’m so sorry to hear this news. Just know you will be in my thoughts and prayers. You are a fighter, Sue, and a woman of great strength and you will make it through this journey with the love and support of your family and many friends.
      Love, Jo

      • Jo, thank you so much. As many prayers as possible, the better. I know I am indeed in for a fight as we lay out a fight plan on Monday. Now I just need to calm down and get back to a sense of peace. Thanks and I love you, Sue

  28. Oh sue
    My prayers for you ,so sorry and angry this has happened but I pray that you have that sense of peace as you win this fight .prayers for your lovely family as well
    As Jo says you are a woman of greAt strength .we all know that is so true
    I can’t put into words what I feel now,except I love you Chris

    • Chris, Thank you sweet friend. I have all of those emotions, also. Talked to my dear daughter who came over and we cried together. That can be such a true, cleansing emotion. Talked to my son who said to call him day or night and said he would come anytime I want him to. Called Jim first of course and he was stunned and very upset. All of my doctors have been so kind. My primary care doctor called tonight, very upset and said she’d been thinking about me ever since I called her office earlier this afternoon. She wanted to know the plan. No plan until Monday when I see the oncologist. Hate to think of all those trips to Portland but shouldn’t worry about that right now, I know. Worried about Jim without any help right now. I know he will manage but it isn’t easy to find nurses to work at a jail so please pray the right person comes along.
      My modified barium swallow just showed some damage at the back of the throat and below, probably from Sjogren’s. They couldn’t envision the esophagus without putting a tube down and that is on the back burner right now in my life. Hope you are feeling okay dear girl. Love you, Sue

      • Sue
        Just keep in mind yourself ,and let the other problems just fall away and your family will want to deal with those themselves .
        I just wish there was a nearer place to go to for you,but as it’s the best it’s that what you should have
        It will be a wait for you till Monday and you can get started,so I pray you will have some precious calm peace over the weekend .
        Love you Chris

    • Sue, just thinking about you. Today at the 4:00 mass, I will be putting your name in the book for prayers and healing.. I have also been saying prayers for strength and courage for you and your family and Jim for Monday when you will learn the drs.plan. Between now and then, I pray you can dig deep to find some peace and a sense of calmness within yourself this weekend. Pray and meditate to free up your mind of any problems and fears.. I love you, Sue….
      Jo xx

      • Jo dear, thank you so much for the prayers and the special care at your church. I do, oddly enough, have a strange sense of calm. Occasionally I cry but it soon passes and that is only when I talk to a friend of family member who is almost as saddened by this complication as I am. I know my oncologist is the best and pray the plan will be guided by God, the doctor’s extensive knowledge and any new developments in this field. I do wish some of these event would give me a breather in between and wish the Lord didn’t have quite so much confidence in me. I love you, too, Sue.

  29. I ENDORSE EVERYTHING CHRIS SAYS………………..MONDAY IS THE DAY WE SHALL ALL KNOW MORE, UNTIL THEN ALL ANY OF US CAN DO IS PRAYER LIKE NEVER BEFORE………………….FAITH AND COURAGE SUE, WE ARE HERE FOR YOU.
    I LOVE YOU……………………………….JENNIE XXX

    • Jennie and Chris, you are a couple of dear people and good friends. Prayers and support of love is what I need and all I ask for. Guidance in this time whatever is to come. I love you both so much, Sue

  30. MY DEAR SWEET SUE, I AM IN SHOCK AND IT HAS TAKEN ME THIS LONG TO POST. I CAN’T EVEN IMAGINE WHAT STATE YOU MUST BE IN. HAPPY TO HEAR YOU HAD A GOOD CRY WITH YOUR DAUGHTER. LIKE YOU SAID IT IS CLEANSING. I HAVE ASKED FOR YOUR NAME TO GO ON OUR PRAYER LIST AT CHURCH. I HAVE BEEN PRAYING FOR YOU SINCE I READ THE NEWS. KNOW THAT ALL OF US HAVE YOU IN OUR HEARTS AND SOULS. GOD BLESS YOU AND YOUR FAMILY. YOU ARE A REAL FIGHTER AND I KNOW IN MY HEART YOU WILL COME THROUGH THIS. DEAR FRIEND TRY AND HAVE A CALM WEEKEND, OF COURSE I KNOW IT WILL BE DIFFICULT BUT MONDAY WILL BE HERE SOON ENOUGH AND THEN YOU WILL KNOW THE PLAN. SENDING YOU HEALING ANGELS AND GUIDING PRAYERS FOR YOU, YOUR DOCTORS AND OF COURSE YOUR DARLING FAMILY.
    LOVE YOU TO THE MOON AND BACK.
    XXX

    • Suzanne, thank you for putting me on your prayer list at church. My feeling is the more folks praying the more of the Lord’s dear attention we’ll get. The Bible tells us His power and grace is made perfect in weakness so we will certainly find out. It’s a strange but wonderful experience to have the concern of so many who I have never met in person. We are all bound by bonds of the heart. This whole blog experience has been one of the most wonderful of my life because I’ve met so many wonderful people like you. Love, Sue

      • OH DEAR ME SUE, I AGREE WITH CHRIS ABOUT THAT DARN WASHER. IT HAS GIVEN YOU LOTS OF TROUBLE AND NOW YOU DO HAVE TO PUT YOURSELF FIRST.
        MAY YOU ALL HAVE A VERY PEACEFUL SUNDAY. LOVE YOU SUE.
        GOD BLESS YOU MY FRIEND AND EVERYONE ON THE BLOG.
        XXX

  31. Dear Peeps”
    My dear Sue…you know you have my prayers. I stood in the prayerline for you last night and had them pray for you. My heart is with you and I pray for strength that you need to get you thru this ! As well as for Jim and your son and daughter. God bless you all
    Love you
    Tonie

    • Tonie, I deeply appreciate your church praying for me and yes, I do know I have your prayers and love. I hope all is going well at home for you and that you aren’t getting too exhausted with all your work for Ms. Alice. Do be good to yourself. Love, Sue

  32. TONIE I GREW STEVIA THIS YEAR. VERY SWEET INDEED. WE ARE NOW DRYING IT AND THEN WE WILL PUT IN OUR MOTAR AND TURN IT INTO POWDER. I’LL LET YOU KNOW WHAT WE THINK.
    LOVE YOU SWEET PEA. HAVE A GREAT DAY.
    XXX

      • HI JO, THAT SOUNDS WONDERFUL. YES, I’LL BE INTERESTED TO KNOW HOW IT TURNS OUT. I BOUGHT MY PLANT AT WALMART’S GARDEN CENTER. IT REALLY DID WELL. THE LEAVES ARE JUST SO SWEET WHEN YOU EAT THEM. GRANDS LOVE GRABBING A LEAF AND MUNCHING AWAY.
        HOPE YOU ARE DOING OKAY JO. LOVE YOU LOTS.
        PRAYERS FOR YOU SUE. LOVE YOU!
        XXX

  33. Well here we are all together for Sue
    We can work wonders I know I have felt it when I needed it
    Be thinking of you Monday sue and DH and all your family

    Suzanne
    You are a Small production there ..wow making your own sugar!

    Nice and sunny here today but cold tonite,but nice
    Had my hair cut today
    Oh…guess what I took my boots to reparer AND he can do them.has to order the whole sole in but he can… joy! No more boot shopping !! I am so surprised as it looks all sealed in one

    Oh yes Sue
    Doc Martin is about a small town Dr…a light drama about him ,his family ( his wife is a school teacher)and the small town in Cornwall .
    It has some great scenery and it’s sort of nice to watch..and funny sometimes as he has a phobia about blood! Some of the people are a bit quirky and very Cornish to listen to. Its whimsical..
    Would you say that was it Jen?
    Well back tomorrow folks got a nurse going to see my dad he hasnt been for over a week..and has taken all stuff prescribed.and also the Parkinson’s drugs don’t work when he doesn’t go..as they work in the bowel
    So have to see how it goes when she comes
    Chris

    • Dear Chris, good to hear from you. Glad you can get the old comfy boots resoled. Just tell DH that you will have the guy polish them up like new and maybe then he won’t be embarrassed. It is funny though, isn’t it? Thanks for the info on the show Doc Martin. I’ve seen it in catalogs and always wondered about it. My daughter just bought me Shades of Love by Rosamund Pilcher for my birthday. It was pretty good but not my fav. The acting wasn’t that great. I loved the Crimson Field. Of course, my all time fav is Pride and Prejudice with Colin Firth.
      I am surrounded by so many prayers and love it is a wonderful thing. Funny how people feel they know me from my writing. Guess it’s because I have such a big mouth. Take care dear and hope all is okay with dear old Dad. Love, Sue

      • Well watching TV whilst awake last nite I saw the old Anne of Green Gables.i loved seeing it again. I used to like R. Pilchers books
        Nurse around at my dads now so just waiting for news
        Chris
        Hey they know you for you!

    • Chris, You’re not going to believe this but my washer isn’t working!!! They’ve replaced the barrel that holds the clothes, the bearings, the computer mother board and now it’s stopped. Hit the button and it started up again, barrel full of water but if it doesn’t work Jim’s going to have a fit. He’s threatening to throw it out but that would cost us so much to buy a new stackable set. UGH> Yes, I love the Canadian version of Anne of Green Gables. Love, Sue

  34. Oh dear sue
    What the hell is wrong with the thing..I go with Jim on this one you don’t need anymore hassle with all that’s going on….I know it’s more expense ..but you come first. I hope it’s just a blip and has put itself right and permanently
    Will the engineer know what’s wrong with it? Before Jim finds out about it .im so annoyed for you here I could kick it for you!

    Just come back from getting a script for my dad .dr put a suppository in but he says the blockage is further up and has given him some stuff to take as well.its that which I’ve just got from a chemists that stays open late
    Well I hope your wash has finished ok….
    Chris

    • Chris dear, Oh yes, frustration hardly says it. Today the washer did work but I had to restart it four times. Not sure how clean the clothes will be. I hated to do it but called the repairman on his cell phone on a Sunday and told him to please save us a spot for Tuesday. I think they might give us a good deal on a new one, hopefully or we’ll have to go to Sears, another store, and their repair service is very slow; one always has to wait ten days, at least. Next time we’ll buy an extended warranty past the third year. SHould have this time.
      Sounds like your Dad needs to drink more and as far as “far up” usually peristalsis, the snake like movement of gut usually sends it on down the line with enough fluids, juices, etc. Oh my, the things we talk about on here. Hope he still likes the new guy caregiver.
      Long day coming up tomorrow. I’m scared yet have a strange calm in between times of pure panic. Love you, Sue

  35. HELLO…….THAT BLOOMING WASHER SUE, ITS A NEVER ENDING SAGA……………WONDER IF WE COULD WRITE A STORY ABOUT IT, AND ADD IT TO TE LIST OF ALL THIS READING MATERIAL AND FILMS WE ALL LOVE…..WE COULD CREATE A WEBSITE “WASHERS ARE US.COM”…….A BOOK COULD BE CALLED “THE MYSTERIOUS CASE OF THE DEFUNCT WASHER”
    OR A SONG CALLED “MISSING WASHER BLUES”…….GETTING CARRIED AWAY HERE, BETTER STOP NOW. TRYING TO KEEP CHEERFUL COS ALL I CAN THINK ABOUT IS MONDAY, AND I HATE THAT YOU ARE HAVING TO DEAL WITH THIS SHIT AGAIN.
    THERE WILL BE SO MANY POSITIVE VIBES GOING OUT TO YOU TOMORROW MY FRIEND…….BOUND TO HELP, IST UP TO US NOW TO KEEP YOU STRONG….AND WE WILL……………….I LOVE YOU……………..JENNIE XX

    CHRIS….YES I WOULD SAY, THAT ABOUT SUMS UP DOC MARTIN, I LOVE IT, AND YES THE SCENERY IS FAB, IF IT AIRS IN THE USA, IT WOULD BE GREAT FOR ALL OUR LASSES ON HERE TO WATCH, HIS FACE WHEN HE SEES BLOOD IS PRICELESS.
    “DOWNTON” TONIGHT, WITH A CHRISTMAS SPECIAL, THEN ITS THE END OF THE ROAD…………..OH HECK!!
    HOPE DH AND DAD ARE OK………………..LOVE JEN X

    SUZANNE…….CURIOUS, HOW DID YOU COME TO GROW “STEVIA” I KNOW ITS FROM FLOWERS, ITS CRYSANTHS ISN’T IT…….YOU SURE THAT IS WHAT YOU ARE GROWING, YOU LITTLE RASCAL YOU???

    TONIE….LIKED THE PHOTO OF YOUR HOME, YOU HAVE MADE A SMART JOB OF IT, WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM YOUR FRIENDS…………………

    TO ALL TODAY…….MUCH LOVE AND THOUGHTFUL PRAYERS TO ALL………………..LOVE JENNIE XXXX

    • Jennie dear, thank you so much for thinking of me tomorrow. I feel all of your prayers, love and concern. I’ve been on the phone all day it seems with cousins and dear old friends about all of this cancer crap. The washer, well, as you guys have said, it’s only money. Painful but a different kind of painful and paired with inconvenience. My goodness didn’t you rap in a most exotic fashion about my washer. You can be such a goofy lady and that’s one of the things I love about you. Takes one to know one type of thing. I will try not to be two envious of you for being able to see the last Downton Abbey. Oh my…well, all the sweeter for the anticipation for us over here I guess. We’ll chat next week and hopefully I’ll be on here tomorrow night if not too tired from the long day. Much love, Sue

  36. Sue, you are in my prayers today and always. I have been in shock over this for you. My heart hurts so much that you are going through this. I pray you have a safe trip today and it won’t be too hard on you. I pray that the oncologist will have wisdom in finding out the right plans for you. I love you so much! I will write more later to share what has been going on with me. Just didn’t want you to think I didn’t care about you. That is definitely not the case. Love you my precious friend.

    To all the rest of you, I will catch up with you later and let you know what is going on with me. I have been reading the blog. Love you all. Donna

  37. Mornin peeps
    Sue saying a prayer for you long journey today and for all the outcome. Still trying to wake up but wanted to put this up.
    Love
    TOnie

  38. Morning again:
    Whew, had some coffee and pushed away some of the cobwebs. Looking for a cheaper insurance quote this morning. Unreal what the cost of auto insurance is these days, and at my age !
    Happy Birthday to Donna !! Hope you have a wonderful day !
    It is rainy like here today, so most of what I wanted to do is not going to happen. The kids are out looking at a house they like, so hope it comes thru if it is right for them. Problem is the kids will have to change schools. There is another here in town, belonged to my great uncle, but it is iffy as it has been empty for a couple of years. We will see.
    I have to go to town and get some feeds and such, but really would like to just lay around in my PJ’s and do nothing !!!
    I was grooming the horses yesterday. I had little Red tied to the fence, and he is usually so calm, but he was ultra spooky. I was going to spray his mane with conditioner, something he tolerates well, but not then, tore the fence loose and alnost the fence post. Got him calmed down and tied him to the gate. Well this time it was just me walking under his lead rope and he tore the gate off almost. I have to replace the pins in it, cause he bent one back. Strong little booger. Not sure why he was so spooky, but will have to spend more time with him, not been up to it of late, just a pet or two. I think his bad eye is getting worse and everything scares him. So must remember to do things from his good side. Poor pet,.
    Hope you all have a great day, especially you Donna !!
    Love
    Tonie

    • Tonie, Just found this on the second to the last blog. Sorry to hear about Red, poor pony. We have a similar situation with Jakie our Schnauzer only he doesn’t have the strength. Old age. Saw on the latest blog the kids got a house. Is it the one where the kids have to change school? Just think how your life will calm down when you can see them a bit less often and get your home back to just you. Wishing them the best. Love, Sue

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