Dilapataded Me And Learning To Rejoice


My body is a wreck.
My condition, never “mint;”
Sometime, when I was gone
My body came and went.

If I was a horse
Irregardless how I cope,
I’m certain that by now
I’d be a bar of soap.

Each time I stand or move
I fear parts of me escape.
Since it might be parts I need,
Guess I’ll use more tape.

I often feel confused
How can I look so good?
I belong in a dumpster,
After all that I’ve withstood.

If I was a goose, I’d be stark naked
A pillow stuffed with down.
If I was a waddling white duck
My tail would rub the ground.

I admit I’m partially ruins
But the part of me that’s left
Should shut up, be quiet and
Stop feeling so bereft.

As long as I draw breath and
My heart beats within my breast,
I thank God for insurance
To restock my medicine chest.

It’s easy to feel forlorn
To grieve for all I’ve lost
To just slide down life’s highway
Is much too high a cost.

My cupboards are chock-full
Of signs of my decay; a cane,
Ace wraps, TENS units,
All of it for chronic pain.

I’ve counted four heating pads,
One’s always on the bed;
Freezer pads all in blue
Frost me from rear to head.

Mattress companies cringe
When they hear me opining;
They just don’t have a warranty
To cover my declining.

This dilapidation of body
Is a complicated mess,
It never seems to stop
Therefore, I utter, “Don’t obsess.”

I’ve decided it’s a contest
To rejoice before I die,
Therefore, each day I stretch
And spit life in the eye.

Pain free, I don’t expect
So, I’ll do the best I can,
And pray each day I live,
Life doesn’t “hit the fan.”

I search for happiness
Like a miner pans for gold
In the in-between, called life,
Dilapidation’s getting old.

Therefore I’ll use it up,
Wear it out, spend all I can.
So be assured, you’re not alone
Join me in my “health plan.”

We each need to remember
We are a sum of all our parts;
But the real priority for us
Is living from our hearts.

10 thoughts on “Dilapataded Me And Learning To Rejoice

  1. Sue
    This certainly made me laugh and I needed one today
    Had to have an mri for headaches I’ve been getting for a few mths now And it’s not the most pleasant thing to happen with your head in a cage in the long tube
    But it’s done so a good laugh was needed
    I know a Sunday is a funny day to have it but I think they are playing catch-up
    Yes searching for happiness is like panning for gold..it’s noticing it as well sometimes it’s so fleeting in the strangest of places
    I saw an article about Someone coughing over Another customer in Astoria in a bagel place,such horrendous things happen here as well….such hate everywhere….but so many people are showing kindness as well..It stands out and is infectious..
    How are you …..

    • Chris dear, So sorry to hear about the headaches. Yes, MRI’s are spooky in their clautraphobia like way. Hope they rule out many things but find answers. As for the news about Astoria, I didn’t hear anything. Might have been the Astoria in NY.
      I get headaches and often find them linked to my cerial spine or shoulder activities. Hope you find solutions. I’m still having gut trouble. See GI doc tomorrow. How do you handle not drinking before some tests due to your Sjogren;s dryness? I worry about choking?
      Keep looking for that happy place. Love you, Sue

      • Well sue what I do is sip water then swoosh it around my mouth and spit it out
        I know it doesn’t help the throat ..there’s no answer but struggle with that one .
        i get a cough headache and when I bend and sneeze etc
        Yes I bet that Astoria was the other one
        I read that sjogrens causes a certain kind of ibs as opposed to the normal I suppose.but a lot of sjogrens patients have it
        How about chewing gum for your throat to keep it moist ..is that allowed as it’s only saliva after it’s been chewed for a while …..new idea second hand gum…..pre chewed….well on that note it’s my bedtime…

    • Lyn, always good to hear from you. Saw your pic with the longer hair on FB. Still looked good though. I wrote that poem several years ago but never posted it. Yep, look for the funny bone, that’s me. Hope you are as well as can be. Love, Sue

  2. Well said.

    Things have been getting much worse for me. Going downhill faster. Xray of neck and both shoulders shows arthritis, Both elbows have nerve issue that causes pain all down my arm into my hands and fingers oh and arthritis in my fingers as well. Little toes are starting to turn inward and my feet hurt consantly and varicose veins in my legs has jumped in for good measure.

    Sleep is a joke. I can make it 3-4 hours before I wake up in pain again and am up for 2-3 hours before the pain is down enough and the next pain pill kicks in.

    Having to take more medicine for the pain just to take the peak off. I am afraid of becoming addicted, but nothing else is helping even a little bit. Arthritis cremes do nothing. Can’t take arthritis medicine because of all the other meds I take and they have so many bad side effects I can’t handle any more problems.

    Oh and did I mention I spent 6.5 hours in the ER for chest pains! Not a heart issue. Possibly GERD is their best guess.

    I am so overwhelmed and depressed. I feel like I am living in a cage with no way out and every once in a while they throw me a bone but it jyst makes it worse. I barely leave my house and see no one. My only salvation is sitting outside and talking and praying to God for the pain to stop. I listen to the beautiful birds singing and it gives me moments of peace.

    • Cindy, oh dear, you are in a dark place. Many of us can relate to having pain 24/7. It sounds to me like you need better pain control and maybe something to help you get a good night of sleep. It shouldn’t take 2-3 hours to get relief. I often have also worried about addiction but when I do my husband asks me, “Do you take them for the high or because you;re in pain?” Naturally, I always answer PAIN. Just get relief. Have you seen a good internist or a good pain doc? Some rub on oils do help. I love to use hemp oil rub on in a roller ball bottle. It really does help a great deal.
      My dear, you need better pain care. Fondly, Sue

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