Mama Never Told Me !

MOMMA NEVER TOLD ME
…what it is to live with chronic illness or daily pain. Of course, my Mom was very healthy most of her life. All of what she had could be helped and she lived to be 93 years young. She could still pinch the cheeks off the grandkids when she was 80 years and older. She couldn’t teach me what she had not experienced when it came to illness and suffering therefore I went off into the world thinking all would be as planned for me. Nothing turned out as I had thought it would. Some of it is much better than I ever dreamed it would be except for the physical health side of life.
Momma never told me you can hurt day and night for years before even knowing what is wrong with you.
Momma never told me doctors are as varied as the planets. There are good ones, sadistic ones, kind ones and all with more knowledge than some other one.
Momma never told me a doctor should be valued for his compassion but also for his current knowledge in his field of expertise. If they were kind and patted her hand every once in a while, that was enough for her, even if the doctor was stupid as a stick.
Momma never told me my life would be totally upturned by an illness that was traveling viciously in one form or another throughout my family’s DNA. When she found out she was terribly hurt and blamed herself. I never understood that because the rheumatoid diseases my sisters and I all have were from Dad’s side of the family. I think it was a mother’s maternal fear for the safety of her children.
Momma never told me all of my training as an RN would be used for only a few years and the remainder of my life would be spent writing about it instead of practicing it.
Momma never told me how many wonderful people I would meet as the result of my illness.
Momma never told me how much of my nursing education I would use on myself.
Momma never told me what it is like to search for solutions when you are in so much pain you begin to think you have lost your sanity.
Momma never told me what it was like to want to smack a doctor.
Momma never told me the relief you feel when you finally find a doctor who says, “You have this and I think I can help you feel better.”
Momma never told me what a wide-spreading affect daily pain can have on your life.
Momma never told me how wonderful it was to be a mother but I saw it in her eyes when she became a grandmother. Now I understand both roles in life.
Momma never told me how hard it would be to parent children or teens when you spend half of your life lying down trying not to let them see you cry due to chronic pain.
Momma never told me the pain and frustration my wonderful husband would experience living with all of my frustrated anger as he struggled to keep our lives on a solid basis.
Momma never told me living in pain is no excuse to be a bitch. Had to learn that one the hard way.
Momma never told me how much patience and tolerance I would have to develop for others as well as myself.
Momma never told me I had to forgive my body for what is has done to me.
Momma never told me how frustrating it can be to try out medication upon medication and suffer their side effects while they strain the family budget.
Momma never told me how judgmental others can be when I can’t attend an event or a simple dinner due to the pain of travel or just sitting.
Momma never told me how painful it is to miss a recital of a grandchild because I’m having a particularly bad day.
Momma never told me I would eventually get over the embarrassment of carrying a soft cushion into a fashionable restaurant.
Momma never told me many folks think life with pain is a contest to see who will win the greatest sufferers award. You know, those people who say, “Oh I had that once,” or “Just perk up and get out more.” They are joined by the, “Girl, you don’t know what pain is,” crowd. No…but you’re about to.
Momma never told me there are some people who are a waste of my time, my life and my concerns.
Momma never told me there are many people in your life who are there for only a season and will move on, or you will move on. That’s not a bad thing. That is just how life is.
Momma never told me how lonely a disabled life can be.
Momma never told me how a lick on the face from a huge dog tongue or the leap of a small furry pooch can make you feel better. She also never told me about the joy of watching all pets, large or small bring joy to an empty heart. Dad taught me that.
Momma never told me how stubbornly and tenaciously I would work not to look sick. Awe, the wonders of a bit of lipstick.
Momma never told me how hard I could fight.
Momma never told me not to lie around all day in my bathrobe. I learned on my own how depressed that makes me.
Momma never taught me the joys of the simplest chores being accomplished ten minutes at a time. She was a “getter’ done” type of person. I’ve become more of a “hope to get it done eventually person”, learning the value of one step at a time.
Momma and Dad always told me they loved me.
Momma and Dad did tell me God would always be there for me.
Momma and Dad did teach me to garden and love the feel of soil, even in a pot of daisies on the porch. They were natural farmers with huge green thumbs.
Momma and Dad did tell me I could be anything in this world I set my heart to be. They just didn’t tell me how painful life could be. Maybe they didn’t want to scare me. I don’t think I taught my children that either. Some things need to be learned at the moment, during the event or hopefully, not at all.

93 thoughts on “Mama Never Told Me !

  1. Lovely thoughts Sue. My mama never told me some of that stuff either, but she lived her life so well and taught me so much about loving the people in your life. That was her legacy. I can’t believe it’s been almost a year since she passes away. I miss her smile, her way of finding the laughter in the midst of catastrophe, her cheerful whistle while she was working…
    I’m bone weary after spending 4 nights in a hotel and then spending today trying to put things back in order after the flood in my apartment. Mama did tell me there would be days when I wanted to pull my hair out. LoL
    I hope you are doing as well as you can be. Much love ❤️ from Princess Crabby Pants 👑

    • Annie, so glad you’re back in. What a dreadful amount of stress you’ve just been through. Could hardly believe it when I read about your flood from above on FB. I know it will take you awhile to get settled again. Hope you didn’t lose much to water damage. DId you? I think most of us can identify with not sleeping well in a motel. Hope your hours at work right now allow you to rest a bit. Thinking of you, Sue

    • Good to see you on here again, Annie. I never sleep well in a hotel, either. Of course, I’ve not been sleeping all that well in my own bed lately, truth be told. :/

  2. Wow sue that all hit the heart and soul
    The one about forgiving your body …never thought of that one..interesting
    And the last one.somethings need to be learned in the moment.
    All of them hit home
    I’ve read it a few times this morning and it’s so good
    Life handed down.. along with possessions ! ..those handed down possessions bring back some of those thoughts too as we’ve been talking about
    Hi Anne
    Sorry to hear about the flood in your home. Hope all is well now
    Chris

    • Chris,, I’m glad you enjoyed the blog. Yes, I just read your remarks on the last blog, at the end of the comments about your interest in ancestry. That’s so amazing you’re traced your family back so far. Must have been a lot of work but fascinating in the process. Also intrigued by your remarks about your DH and the Australian background of his ancestors. We are what we are and it is good to know. I’m pleased my DD is so interested in ours. Hope you’re having a quiet day after your trip. Love, Sue

    • Mary, good to hear from you and thank you for your kind words. It’s rewarding for me to know something I might say can touch another person deeply. Do take care…Sue

  3. This is all so true. As I sit day after day this week with my right shoulder out of whack this time.
    The pain unbearable and not sure if it’s fibro or a rip in a tendon. Today after all the meds it’s starting to feel better. Finally. I never know when or where the pain will hit. It’s hard to plan dinners for friends. I struggled this week making a birthday dinner for some good friends but I did get thru it. You just never know. I was a home health aid and for years felt much worse than the people I cared for and put a smile on my face doing it. Now I’m using all the stuff I’ve learned watching physical therapists and occupational therapists teach people how to live with disabilities.

    • Arlene, I am so sorry to hear about your shoulder trouble. I have similar problems and have had my right shoulder injected so I get it. It is such a struggle to go on with so much wrong all the time, isn’t it. It’s good you caught on to much of what you saw as an aide. That’s hard work. I hope it is a fibro flare that will ease and not a tendon. Prayers, Sue

  4. Awesome! Really needed this one. Going thru a bad patch. One of the bad things about growing old is losing friends and family. My generation of family is all gone now and most of my friends. I still have younger friends, but nobody that I can talk with about the past. I know with all the real things, like pain. that seems trivial. Sorry to be so down. Love you guys so much. Take care. Janet

    • Janet, No, it is not trivial. There is a certain loneliness that comes with loss and change and it hurts. I’m just a few years behind you and do have some understanding. Two of my sisters are gone due to a couple of these horrid diseases and the only one I have left hasn’t spoken to me in 6 years. I miss my family. I am blessed with a few precious old friends and know their value.
      Sometimes life is simply too much to bear and I hope you have some ideas for pulling yourself up a bit. Does it help to get out? Who can you talk to? I hate having the blues and have had more of them on list darn Lyrica. It’s awful when we have to take care of the pain and pay other prices in other ways. Hugs, Love, Sue

    • Janet
      Dear girl, prayers for your down spell. So,etimes it feels like there is no one. Are there horses nearby you can go and see ? I know how much you love them. I will send you my phone number and we can talk, if you want to. So much stuff in this life to bring us down. Let me know if I can help
      Love
      Tonie

      • Dear Tonie and Sue, Thank you for your kind thoughts, they really help. My son and DIL have been a great help, I am not normally depressed, usually quite positive. Pain is messing with my head. Still waiting on the Ortho guy about the MRI and if they can do something about my back. Thanks again for being here. Love, Janet

  5. Oh this sings to me. My dad has had the guilt issue because of the genetic nature of part of my issues specifically the Ankylosing Spondylitis and Sjogrens. His grandmother had the psoriasis (my psoriatic arthritis I’m sure starts there) . Although I’m blessed by the systemic issues and have some really tough days I still know how lucky I am because of my faith, income, insurance that make things a little easier. I miss having my mom’s nurturing and the women who stepped up to be there after she died at the age of 63. I sure would love to pick her brain about things that my dad simply can’t answer. He tried to be there after mom died but it’s not the same and as he ages our roles tend to shift. Mom was tough, she never complained about being sick and really didn’t coddle us when things happened either. She took care of us but not overly protect, baby, or encourage us to stay down any longer than absolutely necessary. I wasn’t healthy as a child (frequent bronchitis, eczema/psoriasis, allergies etc) and remember sleeping under my mom’s work desk after Grandma Carter passed d away (she would care for me prior while mom worked). Mom did prepare me for the reality that life isn’t fair, to be practical, be thrifty, and that I don’t need everything I want.

    • Laura, looks like I stirred up a lot of memories. Was your Mom sick as an adult? She sounds like a wonderful woman. What kind of work did she do? Do you think most of the rheumatoid disease came from your Dad’s side of the family? DOn’t you have a sister? Is she well? Hope I’m not getting too personal, just think this blog lends itself to making us all think along those lines. Hope life is as good as can be for you right now. Love, Sue

      • My mom died at 63 of a pulmonary embolism. She had pelvic venous congestion related to fibroids and endometriosis. After my sister (3 years older) we each spoke to our respective OB/GYN and due to our risks each had a total abdominal hysterectomy within a few months. Mine saved my life. My uterus was lined with precancerous polyps. I had a fibroid tumor causing a partial bowel obstruction and endometriosis as well. I had been menopausal from 35, mom died when I was 36 and my hysterectomy was at 38. Mom’s dad died at 54, mom and 2 siblings at 63-64 and the last at 66 all from different issues. All the autoimmune disease is on my father’s side of the family. My mom was a teacher until I was born then managed a business near home then worked at the local credit union dealing with all the computer systems. I had to call her in dead to work after performing CPR on her until the fire department and paramedics arrived. She died the Monday after Easter. My parents next door neighbor had passed away on good Friday. We were considering putting a tent up between driveways for coffee and snacks as many new both families….both lived in their homes for 40+ years. My dad still lives in the house and my house is around the corner (been here 25 years). I have been nagging my sister about her health. She is a heavy smoker, doesn’t exercise, has put on a lot of weight, and takes after the short lived side of the family. I mentioned “I’ve done the math, you need to start taking care of yourself”. She of course admits she needs to go back to the gym but then makes excuses on why she can’t. It’s sad that I get more exercise than she does. She’s been spending a lot more time with me this summer and talking because dad is more fragile at nearly 82. She’s been watching Remi with me and last week was quite concerned because Remi kept alerting on me. I finally confessed when dad wasn’t around that I had over done physically the day before and wasn’t steady on my feet and Remi knew it. I thin my sister seems to understand my changing health.

  6. Hey all
    Sue, wonderful reminder of things past and present. I lost my Mother so young it is like she was gone forever, I was only 22. Lost my Daddy at 18, so I have had to muddle through adult life on my own. Probably why I made so many mistakes ! I try hard to keep going. And Chris, yes you would think my muscles would be good enough, but he said more ! I should let you trace my roots ! Lol.
    I am having brunch with ya’all . Made myself pancakes and strawberries. I found a mix with whole wheat, low sugar and gobs of protein, and they are good.
    When I was first diagnosed, I was whiney All I could think was what was to come. And that no one understood,mthen thought it was just aching joints ! Haha still do. But then I found this blog, and Sue and all of you. It has made me realize how blessed I am, how to cope and I have a place to whine where people care
    I love you guys, you are a caring bunch of people who commiserate together. Keep on cranking them out Sue, for you are the glue that holds this together
    Love to all
    Tonie

    • Tonie, glad to hear I am glue.Sounds useful, anyway. I am always amazed by this group of folks who have come together over the years as they come and go depending on health issues, etc. I hope you’re okay today after your big day yesterday. I knew you lost your folks when you were young and that did leave a big hole in your life. I was always closer to my Dad but I think there were other times when Mom and I were closer after my sisters who were all older left to get married. I have always thought it would be interesting to know what kind of people our parents were, back in the day. Too bad life is not a video. Oh, as far as the ancestry thing there is so much that can be done online now. It’s amazing the info that is there.
      Thanks again for posting this current blog for me the techno illiterate. I appreciate your efforts very much. Love, Sue

  7. Thank you, Sue. I’m always so blessed by your blog! It touched my heart when you talked about how “Momma never told me how lonely a disabled life can be.” It truly is lonely. My kids and grands are scattered many miles away. But when I do get to see my babies it brings me so much joy!! I’m thinking and praying about a puppy for companionship.

    • Brenda from Texas, I know. It is a lonely life especially when it keeps you from good family times. I hate feeling left out but sometimes, there is no choice. What area of TX are you in?
      You know me…I vote yes for a puppy. I think pets are always good idea if they are manageable, small enough to handle and if a rescue, house trained. I love that idea for you if you are up to it. What kind of pup are you thinking about? Do take care and let me hear from you, okay? Love, Sue

      • I know my animals have kept me alive. It’s the reason I get up every day, they comfort me on difficult days and I’m blessed to have my second service dog.

    • Hey Brenda fromTexas- where in Texas are you from? I live in the DFW Area, Irving to be exact. If you’re close by we could net up for coffee or something. I don’t mind driving a little distance.

  8. Sue, This will touch so many in so many different ways. One can’t help but read each line and think of how it rings true in our own lives. Something for everyone. Yes, my mother never told me so many of those things, either. Could be because I was the one who exhibited the RA first! Perhaps OA also, although she had early indications of it herself, but with no pain!?!? Lucky her. It has all caught up to her, of course, after me. So, tables were turned in some of the above in our case – I was telling her! She has felt bad and responsible for my illness. I am pretty sure I have arthritis coming from both sides of the family. Oh yay. Been doing my best dealing with new symptoms that showed up with the last flare. Time will tell how they will affect me in future. Also been busy with the usual and an additional side “job” helping out a friend/relative from marriage. I’ll help her as long as I can without my arthritises going nuts, and she needs me. Busy times, so I may not be able to hop on very often, but will keep everyone in my thoughts and prayers.
    Best to all!

    • Lyn, do take care of yourself. Remember you can’t give from an empty vessel. You’re a sweetheart, you know. Interesting to hear about your family. Seems I have everyone thinking about DNA today. Hope your Mom isn’t too severe in her flares. Interesting how we all share. I was in that role with my Dad as a nurse when he had cerebral arteritis. I even rode in the ambulance with him and stayed on a cot in his room at UC San Fran when he was in bad shape. Families are who we are and they can get complex, that’s for sure. DO take care now. Love, Sue

  9. Laura, thanks for sharing your family info. It was very interesting. I can see why you miss your Mom so much. I hope your sister starts to take her health more seriously. SOunds like she hasn’t had an scares in the health department as yet. Sometimes that’s what it takes. Hope all is well with dear Remi. Love, Sue

  10. Good morning all
    Whew, what a weekend. Thursday and Friday really wore me out ! Saturday I stayed inside and did some (ugh) housework. Made my dill pickles and some peach mango salsa. Easy stuff really, just chopping mostly. Sunday I was still sleep walking ! But yesterday I got woke up with a phone call from my FM so made my day. Started my weight regime for my quads before swimming. They are a bit sore today, but not bad. Cooked supper for my other man. Bless his heart. He is stubborn as a ,use. But he ate good. We talked more than last time. He was in WWII, in the Navy. And I talked to him about eating so he could be strong enough to stay in his home. I am thinking of getting him a jigsaw puzzle from the Dollar Tree, maybe it will help him a little. He was a very smart man, now he is so embarrassed because of his memory. I shared with him how with FMS it happens to me, in fact as we were talking it happened. Every time I have to explain to him how much he pays me and why, and he insists on writing me a check for now instead of once a week cause he doesn’t know if he will be busy or not ! I get tired trying to focus for three hours talking to him. But if I can help it is worth it. I enjoy this type of work, though sometimes I get tired and aggravated, but it is better than being a Walmart greeter !
    Well, gotta give Ms Alice a bath. Love to you all
    Tonie

    • Tonie, Glad you’re sounding a bit more rested but today looks like a long one. It’s good you are there for the old fellow. That’s the story of the end of life for most people and it is unfortunately sprinkled with confusion, pain and loneliness. I’ve seen it a thousand times. I think the puzzle or even one of those cheap little hand held games would be a good idea for him. Jim’s aunt loved crossword puzzles and word games. We all look for ways to keep the mind busy and fill the hours when we get old. So many of those things help with confusion.
      Your salsa and pickles sound so delicious. Where do you store all your canned goods? Has your weaether cooled off a bit or is it still up and down?
      SO good you got to talk to your FM. I know that peps up your day and attitude. There is a magic in that connection for you. How is your knee doing now? What are you doing to strengthen the legs? How’s the sciatic doing? So much to deal with everyday, I know. Love you, Sue

      • Hey Sue
        Yes it makes my day when I hear from him. He is so busy, works until all hours of the evening getting his work done, so I don’t get as many calls or messages as I would like.
        Right now I a, storing my canned stuff in a closet where the furnace and water heater are. I have a cabinet in there. So little room. I would like to have a block shed to store canned goods in. Maybe a job for FM lol.
        I am using the weight bench at the gym for lifts. Monday I did the sets he recommended. I could do 45 lbs very easy, so stronger than I thought. 50 lbs is what I need to work up to. So today before swimming after work, I will go thru that area and do the set again. A little sore, not too bad.
        Sometimes it is aggravating taking care of Ms Alice. She is like a toddler, always into something or requiring attention for silly things. I try to not be , but when I am tired or don’t feel well. Okay here she goes !
        Love ya
        Tonie

  11. Nice suprise tonie FM ringing
    Hot here today 91f and tomorrow..but it’s so much cooler in the house here..one if the reasons we moved
    Busy Tomorrow dentist,over to clean the graves ,then the stonemason. Then the optician again
    Went out today to sort stuff out again and then went to a cafe on this lake we go to now and had tea and….CAKE..it was nice watching all the people on boats on it and pedalows
    Tonie you sound as if you are getting on fine with this Man now
    Can you tell me the name of this ointment I mite try and get it from the dr here..can only try
    Sue did your hubby enjoy that time he went to Portland for the car thingy
    Lyn
    Look after yourself
    Chris

    • Chris, yes, Jim had a good time but it wasn’t a car show, it was a gun show. The car shows were out here and he had to miss them that day. Did you see my entry a couple of days ago about Tonie’s ointment? Some of these ointments do not have a special name because they are mixtures made by the pharmacists. I posted all about mine on FB. Wish you were on there because you miss quite a bit. Anyway, there are plenty of over the counter cremes on the market right now, especially the ones with lydocaine that you might try.
      Tea and cakes sounds so good. The setting is always so quaint and peaceful sounding when you describe it. Sorry it’s so hot there. Love here today and so clear and beautiful. Love, Sue

  12. Sue
    Well I’ve tried so many creams..voltarol which Is declofenac.but I’ll have to try one with lidocaine if i can see it
    Apparently it was the hottest day here since 1911 . And gives it the same tomorrow.today I seemed fine with it cool by the lake and the house was cool….just avoid the conservatory till the night time.but we do sit there for breakfast before the sun comes around
    Picking some flowers from the garden to take to my mum and dads tomorrow.still have some lovely white ones and the honeysuckle is blooming again
    Today Im feeling not bad..I think as we have had two days off from doing In the house . So hopefully it will
    Be the same tomorrow
    Although DH had to go to dr again today ,meds again …so he has to cut down and go back in two weeks..side effects again with the Bp meds.
    Chris

    • Wow Chris, sorry to hear about the heat and at this time of the month, too. Glad the new house is cool and you’re doing okay. Sorry to hear DH still has med trouble. Jim falls asleep quite a bit and I always think it is his B/P meds but he doesn’t think so. It’s hard to argue with a nurse.
      As far as cremes for the joints, there are so many advertised. I doubt if my new insurance will pay for the creme I have now so I will have to investigate some over the counter types. Have you ever tried that blue emu creme? One of Jim’s friends likes it. Awe but life is complicated. Glad yours has calmed down. Love, Sue

    • Chris
      Sorry it is so hot. fM said it had been super hot there as well. That the trees were drying up from the heat and lack of rain. But the forecast for his region is rain later this week. We have been very hot here as well. Staying in the 80s but cooler at night, foggy in the am . I hope it stays warm like it did last year. Mild winter.
      Sounds like your new home is just what you needed. Take care
      Tonie

  13. Guys, I am reading a medical paper that the Doc gets here, and there is a new eye drop approved for dry eyes. It is called Xiidra. Just an FYI to see if you want to try it. FDA approve it.
    Take care !

    • Thanks Tonie. Just started Restasis for dry eyes after cataract surgeries this summer. But I’ll keep this one in mind if Restasis doesn’t help.

    • Tonie, Thanks for the word about the drops. Personally, I didn’t do well on Restasis because apparently I’m allergic or sensitive to cyclosporin. Made me dizzy. Annie dear, that doesn’t mean you won’t do just fine on it. Dry eyes are such a pain. Chris and I can testify to that all day long. Sue

  14. I’ve looked it up tonie and will talkabout it with my dr when I see him.thankyou for keeping an eye out for that
    It mite be soon as apparently my eye pressures have gone up again
    It was warm today,but not as yesterday.and gives it cooler tomorrow
    Oh yes sue we don’t have that cream here
    Just had something to eat gonna wash up now
    Chris

    • Chris, Glad a bit cooler for you. As far as your eye pressures just wanted to ask if you use a prednisone or cortizone drop at all. Mine go up when I use any steroid in the eye. Still have to on occasion. I have four drops in the BR right now…for allergy, for dryness, for more allergy, the one with steroids and fluid replacement drops. Gees, this life of ours. Later, Sue

      • No only using visco tears
        But my eyes are aching inside
        But I have had a bleed at back of eye along the optic nerve
        Chris

  15. Chris
    We finally got some rain tonight, a LOT of rain. But we needed it badly. It cooled it down a few degrees, but we are back to the 80’s again tomorrow. But there is a tropical storm coming up the coast so we should get rain again,
    I went to swim today. And do my weight sets for my legs. The manager came by and told me I should use the inverted leg press because it doesn’t hurt your knee as bad and exercises the entire leg. And I can use much more weight on it. Started it out at 120 lbs. got my ice cream cone afterwards…..and a fish sandwich, I was too hungry to eat when I got home !
    Hope it cools down some there for you this weekend. Where is Jennie ? Haven’t seen the Yorshire lass on here in a few days.
    Take care and have a good day
    Tonie

    • Tonie and Chris, heard from Jen on FB today. Trying to get all ready for the move. This is such a stressful time for her and DH moving to another country, having to leave so much behind. She promises to come back after she gets moved in a couple of months. I miss her, too. Sue

    • Tonie, the inverted leg press sounds great. So proud of you for all you’re doing to stay strong and of course a bit of this is to be in shape for your FM. Just be cautious with the knees, okay? I think a block shed would be a great idea for all your canned goods. Just thinking about the old in the ground cellars we used to see with relatives in the middle west. We have a full basement and it’s full of junk. Why can’t we ever seem to get it cleaned out? It’s late and I am pooped from cleaning the front porch with sponges and tooth brushes in the cracks. These old wood porches…and we are at a four way stop and there is always black soot from the cars. Life goes on along with dirt, mold, dust and dog poop. Love, Sue

    • You seem to be getting good advice from the gym…was icecream one of theM!
      I had one the other day with marsh mallows all round it
      I think it will be cooler today gives storms tonite
      Jen is ok but run down with so many problems with leaving house and country.so much at one time coming .also the health probs playing up too. It is a worry where to live when not in the same country to see it etc
      My weight seems to be keeping steady..but have small meals and if I have a treat out I miss a meal
      Chris

  16. Sue Lyn Tonie Chris Bobsled Jennie, Pommum and all- it’s good to be back. The past 18 months have been hard after back surgery, losing mom, having the InterStim surgery this spring (sacral nerve stimulator fir bladder function- a bladder “pacemaker” if you will, but it’s great- no more catheters!!!!) Then two cataract surgeries this summer. Finding my new “normal” has been quite a journey and I just kind of kept up a little on Facebook and not so much with the blog. Ive thought of you all often and kept you in my prayers but just didn’t have the mental energy for a lot of personal notes to each one. Welcome to all the newer folks I’m not yet acquainted with.
    The part-time nurse at work quit so I worked a lot extra over the summer but am now back down to my 4 day work week. Still looking for other work opportunities but things are calm enough now that I’m hanging in there.

    Sue- luckily, didn’t lose much in the flood. The waterlogged spaces were limited to about half of my apartment and I had the presence of mine to dump out some plastic storage bins and put under where the water was pouring thru the ceiling so damage was mainly to the carpet and flooring. My dining room table was ruined, bathroom memory foam mats, throw rugs, some towels I used to soak up the mess, one suitcase in my closet floor and my bathroom scale. Not bad overall. I have renters insurance so my hotel, replacement items, and the person I paid to help me put things back in order should all be covered.
    Well, gotta get some sleep so I’m not Princess Crabby Pants 👑 at work tomorrow! Love to all-

    • Annie, good to see you back on here. Sounds like you’ve had quite a year. Some of it I followed on FB but not all. Glad things have quieted down at work for you and you are back to your 4 day work week. That’s plenty with all you have going on physically. Hope the last back surgery helped.
      Sounds to me like you lost quite a bit in the flood from the apartment up above yours. Glad you have renters insurance. Hope the dining room table wasn’t a family heirloom. So much inconvenience was hard on you, I’m certain and four nights in a hotel…rest up now sweet lady, okay? Love ya, Sue

    • Annie
      You have had so much done
      The bladder surgery was an unusual one It sounds as if all went well there. But yes a new normal with so much going on for you
      Good job you had renters ins and I hope you get sorted out there with nothing outstanding
      Hope you got that sleep
      Chris

    • Chris, I’m surprised you are only on replacement tears. Have you ever tried any of the OTC drops for allergies? Sounds like you’re having an easier week now. Hope it continues through the weekend. Not much new news from you lately. Jim and I went on errands yesterday and went out for lunch. Caused me a lot of sitter and hip pain but that is normal. Went to the lumberyard and got replacement paint for the rails out front on the porch. Hope it warms up enough today to dry the dew out there because we have a rainstorm moving in. I’m determined to attack our basement. It’s a terrible mess. Even found a dried old wasp nest down there yesterday. With Jim working until June and me being so sick the last few years, it must be done. I’ll have to see what I can do 15 mins at a time. Grands coming over after school today. Always a good thing. Did daughter come out again? Hope you got to see her. How’s your hip doing? Later, Love, Sue

      • Well my hip..I can do so much then it plays up.some days not too bad then not too good
        No I haven’t tried anything else for eyes I thought I could only have the sterile ones with no preservatives
        Eyes are heavy and ache and headache with it and feel sick all the time.i can eat just my head feels so full and heavy with my eyes .so haven’t done any new stuff for a few days
        Hope you can get the rails painted before rain
        No DD didn’t come again she’s been busy going to stay in London to work with her job.it happens some weeks
        Been raining all day and much cooler..I’ve changed to warmer clothes now
        Have a good time with the grands
        Chris

  17. Morning all
    Wrote a big post last night on my laptop and couldn’t remember the password lol ! So….I don’t remember what I wrote so it must have been epic ! Haha
    Annie, so good to see you back here. Glad you made it through the flood and health issues. We have missed you !
    No, Chris, ices cream was not advice given….my own remedy. Gs it. The beans are in my pressure cooker on warm until this evening. A woman I grew up with is the mil to the son of this man. She wrote me to be careful of the daughters. They are getting ready to stick him in an assisted living. Didn’t like that I told him how bad nursing homes were and that he needed to eat more so he didn’t have to go. I don’t understand people, I really don’t.
    The weather is cloudy , overcast and cool. I am feeling like roadkill. Still trying to make up my mind about swimming. I may drive up after feeding my little man. Making him pinto beans, fried potatoes, tomatoes and maybe cornbread, see if he wanThey are open until 9. If I rest most of the day I will be fine. I must go to the bank now and do something with these checks.
    Well, another cup of coffee and get dressed.
    Love to all
    Tonie

    • Tonie, Wow, the dinner you have cooking sounds so southernly delicious. Is that even a word? Well, you know what I mean. I hope your body was up for a swim today and weather warmed up a bit. We’re having Fall weather most definitely with possible rain. Well, I have some resting and some chores to do before the grands get out of school. Stay as well as possible, dear lady. Love, Sue

  18. Had to post this again
    There is something intriguing about the photo with this blog
    It’s the way she holds her head,her hand on her neck..her smile ..I can’t quite get his look .i wish I knew their history Chris

    • Chris, Just ask me anything you want to know about the picture. It was taken in approximately 1924 or
      1925. She was 15 and he was 20. It was the state of Oklahoma, times were hard. They were young and in love. He was a farmers son and filled with vinegar. He always dressed with pride and he, along with his brothers had a wild reputation. He was an amateur boxer and had another job but I don’t recall what it was at this time. They married shortly after this picture was taken. He delivered furniture for a store after they were married and taught himself how to be an upholsterer. They moved to California with their four daughters, during world war 11 and he worked at various jobs until he could open his own upholstery, custom built furniture business.
      She lived with her father and her grandparents. Her mother had left the family when she was only five years old. She had two brothers. She was an innocent, but fun loving young girl, quite old for age since she didn’t have a mother and life had not been easy for her. I think in the picture which was originally taken on one of those old machines they had at carnivals and fairs and was about 2 inches by 2 inches, well, I think she was holding back her hair or covering her nervousness. I like the flapper style dress and his suit and his very stylish hat.
      Many years after they were married he took that tiny picture into a local artist and had him paint a copy, a portrait, of the original picture. That is the reason it doesn’t copy as well as a photo would copy.
      I love this picture and have the painting on my stairwell on the wall with other family pics. They were my parents, Bill and Dorothy Falkner. Love ya, and yes, I’m open to questions. Sue

  19. Oh sue…what a lovely story…I’m so pleased Thankyou they are a handsome couple. And they sound as if they had a lovely future….the promise of that shows in their faces
    I think you are right her hand is covering her nervousness and he does look so proud
    I know your dad passed away in such sadness and your sister you haven’t seen for a while.its a shame she couldn’t look at that photo and see the happiness there
    How good to have it there to see every day ,your grands must pass by it all the time…it must be one of those bitter sweet moments
    I love it when my GS asks about photos and looks at them
    I’m so pleased I asked now..Having seen a photo once of you I think you look like you mother . She looks also like she had a lightness of spirit which you have also. I hope that translates well in our language !
    I have kept looking at it before I asked trying to see the lives…..I get hooked onto the past as you know not just dates and stuff but lives lived
    I hope DD finds out all there is on the family history trail ..
    so its morning here I’m going to get ready and off out for a cheese scone and tea.so glad I woke up and had your post
    Chris

    • Chris, I am sorry you didn’t know previously these are my parents in the photo. When I posted it on FB I told everyone and always forget you are not on there, also. Yes, I think they did have a good life. It was like so many others, full of ups and down but they were married over 60 years. Dad’s business was prosperous and they were good parents and grandparents. The church was the center of their social life in California.
      I started on a new pain patch today and it is too early to tell if it is going to help me or not. I feel a bit weird right now but Jim was reminding me it will take a few days to get used to it…wait and see. Hope you enjoyed your breakfast out and were in a beautiful little tea shop as you are so often. Later, Love, Sue

  20. Morning all
    Sue, yes I got my swim in and may do that again on Fridays. It was so quiet and peaceful. Being Friday not many people there. Came home had cheese (yum) grapes and crackers for supper. Couldn’t eat beforehand. Good thing too cause he stuffed himself. And then wanted to make sure I didn’t throw out any potatoes ! Haha. I made him up two dinner plates so he can just warm them up in the microwave. He had a can of mixed greens and I added those and sliced tomatoes. He was happy. We talked more and he wasn’t watching the clock, so he is relaxing some. Makes me feel good to be of use this way. I got an email from FM while I was sitting with him, and I told him who it was. FM was getting ready for bed, and my little man knew right away the time difference ! Just talking and searching the mind helps so much don’t you think ? I want to ask his daughter about getting him some melatonin to help him sleep. That stuff is wonderful, and no harm to you. I think everyone aging should take it !
    Chris, hope you get relief for your eyes. Sue, hope you get to paint your banister. I have to get going and get in the garden. Dig potatoes and pick hot peppers and cherry tomatoes. My AC in the living room gave up the ghost last week, and we are to be in the 80’s all next week ! Hope the air stays cool though.
    I bought two stools from a yard sale. I got one painted, just the legs, white and am going to make cushion tops for them.
    I shared a couple of pics on FB my cousin sent me of my Granny Rose and some of my aunts and uncles. They were so poor. My grandfather died in the swine flu epidemic of 1918. My mother was 3 months old. You can see where my grandmother had a Suoix great gran. She had the blackest eyes and was so tiny.
    Well gotta get, have a good day all
    Love
    Tonie

    • Tonie, glad you got your swim in. SOunds so good. It also sounds like things are going well for you new patient, client…what do we call this gent? Obviously he likes your cooking and it does sound like he is beginning to feel more at ease with you.
      I enjoyed the pics of your family on FB. I think so many of our relatives in the south at the turn of the century were poor and knew hard times. Yes, your grandmother’s pic is wonderful. It looks like the search my niece and Beth are doing is revealing my great grandparents may have been Chickasaw or Choctaw, from the Oklahoma territory. It’s interesting and a bit complicated to find out all that heritage.
      Hope things are going as well as possible for Fm. It must have been fun to share with your gentleman all about your FM. You lead such a fascinating life. Later, need to do something productive to this very dirty house. Can’t believe how bad it has become in the last 2 years with me out of commission so much of the time. It’s depressing to face so much feeling so badly. Must move forward. Love, Sue

  21. Hi all
    Sunny warm day here today
    Went for a little walk by the rowing lake..I like it as you see a lot of activity on it.
    DH painted some more trellis to go on garden wall
    His bp is up since having to cut down on meds again…I done some gardening

    Hope all had a good weekend
    Chris

    • Chris, Another lovely weekend for you. How tranquil yet interesting the rowing lake sounds. Your poor DH. Those blood pressure meds just don’t seem to do it for him and when they do he has to deal with a side effect.
      As far as the pain patch, it went on yesterday. I had a surge of something and then got a headache. Took something for the headache. I think it’s the adjustment period. It seems to have helped the pain a bit but I’m reaching the conclusion I may have to choose between feeling woozy or goofy and living with pain. Too soon to tell about this new med just yet.
      Quiet weekend here. Jim and I have been cleaning out our basement. I can only do it in short burtsts but it is a good feeling to be tackling the mess. It’s a huge job but in small amounts we’ll get it done. With Jim working the long hours he did and my health, it’s accumulated, you know?

  22. What an inspiring, comforting post.
    I’m so glad I found this blog – a blessing from Father. 🙂 I keep a gratitude journal and this discovery will be on today’s list.
    My mum is such a support to me. She’s always available day or night and that’s such a blessing.
    I’m going to add this blog to my list of favourites and will be visiting often.
    Thank you Sue.

    • Hi Kay and welcome. I enjoyed getting to know a bit about you in our conversation on FB yesterday. I’m sorry you need this kind of blog but thankful you found us if you need this info. Chris, say hello to one of your fellow countrymen because Kay is from England.
      Hope you have less pain today just knowing there are thousands if not millions of us out here in the world who understand what you are going through. Fondly, Sue

  23. Hi Kay .
    Sorry you had to find the blog,but glad you found us
    A gratitude journal….that sounds interesting and such a good idea
    Hope you come back soon
    I wonder which part you live in ..in the north….down south….
    If it’s like where I am it’s poured all day..I live in the eastern side
    Well all
    Went shopping today as tomorrow DH has a urology appt and Wednesday an inr appt. also a man is coming to do some gardening taking out a crab apple tree and putting in a pear tree .also having a new fence put up in the front so going to be busy,so nice to get the weekly shop behind us
    But got wet in the rain and aching now!

    Hope you made inroads into the basement sue
    Chris

    • Chris, you sound so good in spite of the aching from the rain. Life is moving along and it must feel so good to be getting so much accomplished with the house. A new pear tree sounds delicious and lovely and a new fence? What kind of fence, if I may ask? Metal, wooden, etc. I love fences and the way they define a house. I believe what Robert Frost the poet said is true; “Fences make good neighbors.”
      I do hope you begin to feel better as you rest and get nice and warm. Yes, we are making inroads into the mess that we laughingly call a basement. It’s far too large. We seem to fill whatever space we have. It was a strangely emotional experience because we came across many things that just got moved with us 18 years ago when we came from Calif. to Oregon. Many things we had not seen in years…some to keep, some to discard. We came across Jim’s old U.S. Army uniform for instance. I found a couple of hooked rugs Beth and I made and never got bound with backing, so many things. Some I’m parting with due to age and my health. That’s difficult as you know from your recent move. Now we have to take a break for trash day to take some of it away so we can delve even more. I would say we about a quarter of the way through it all. Beth, my DD is having a garage sale this weekend and we will part with much at that. If it doesn’t sell it goes to the charity thrift store. My back is in a state because of all I’m trying to do. It’s too much and I know it is but it does feel good to accomplish something. Small bites, small steps, you know. Do be good to yourselves and hope the medical appts. go well. Love ya, Sue

    • Hi Chris. I live in Cornwall, the land of Poldark, pasties and piskies.
      Sorry for the late reply, but it was my younger son’s birthday yesterday and not only was I arranging a birthday tea for him (he’s 34!), but I was also packing for a holiday in Lanzarote next week, and my niece was colouring my hair. Out two grandsons were here (6 & 4).
      It was a bit stressful because my husband and I were making our first attempt at a Baked Alaska. It turned out well. 🙂
      We had terrible weather last week. The water poured down, overflowing our guttering and flooding parts of our town.
      Lovely to know there’s someone from England here. This little corner of the U.K. was once a separate kingdom. A lot of us still think we are!! 😉

      • Hello Kay ! Glad you joined us. I love Poldark ! Of course here in the states we are a year behind on episodes !
        Hope you enjoy your holiday. Do come back and talk with us. I live in Virginia in the US
        Tonie

  24. Hya Kay
    Great to hear from you
    It does sound as if you had a busy time…wow so much stuff going on in your corner
    Cornwall I love..spent many holidays there polpero…mousehole…tintagel..my DD goes down there a lot for surfboarding .originally I’m from mid Wales but I’ve been all over the place
    Jen ,when she’s not so busy,will be back ,her son lives there ,and she hopes to move to Devon soon…from France
    So..I live in east Anglia…not the most great of places ,but it’s not far from the part of the coast we love
    My daughter is 44 now..just the one and one GS nearly 20
    Well the weather has been fine today ,hopefully for the next few days having a lot done in the garden
    I hope you have a great time away..nice time to go there
    Oh and baked Alaska …how brave!

    SUe
    It’s a wooden fence to enclose our front area to make it more private it’s a corner one with a gate..but first gotta get a lot of roots out and old fence..they are doing that tomorrow ..will send a pic when all done.
    In the back they took some old fence work down,and some huge bamboo that was too much trouble and growing roots everywhere .. will take some weeks for them to get rid of it all
    Dh had his appt at hospital for prostate ..she said…I know he wasn’t happy with a she….it was all ok.so pleased with that..but she said if he has another infection he will have to have it cored out a bit.
    Inr tomorrow
    Yea we found so much when we went thru stuff.old books of mine at school.dDS old girl guide stuff and her school things
    Letters my MUm sent me ,old stuff of my dads…..I was sad and surprised in one go!
    Ok gonna get ready for bed..up,early with the workmen coming again tomorrow
    Chris

    • Oh Chris, Can’t blame DH for feeling that way about a female doc for a prostate exam. Oh my, just hearing the words “cored out” make me squirm a bit and I’m female and a nurse. Hope that doesn’t come about. Your fence sounds like it will be so nice. White pickets? Looks like a lot of work getting there but well worth it.
      I’ve had readers from England previously, know from FB but so many people don’t write in on the blog. Guess the percentage is quite low. Lots of folks are shy about such things.
      As far as the prowling through the basement, I think it made me depressed to have to toss out so many things that were once important or other things I know no one else will want after Jim and I are gone from this world. I just don’t want our kids to be faced with that chore. I remember when we went through my MIL’s house. I wouldn’t wish that on our family, ever again. I also like the feeling of order it gives me knowing it is slightly in order down there. Now I must tackle the kitchen which will be a much easier job. How do all those cupboards get so cluttered and the glass cabinet fronts get so dirty? Must have tiny gremlins in the house at night, huh?
      Hope you rest well after your busy day. Love, Sue

  25. Hello all
    Whew, been a whiz bang weekend. Sunday I was so tired I collapsed after church ( and pancakes) and went to sleep, didn’t get up for evening services, too much too long. So I feel your pain Sue. I love hooked rugs. Are ou going to get them bound ? I have a huge one that Millie gave me that her mother made, all cabbage roses. I have one to do…..sometime with a kitten. It will be my first attempt.
    Couldn’t sleep last night so worn out today. Had to come home and mow. Ms Alice fell today, just called to check on her. She was iwalking in front of me and just sat down ! I couldn’t get her up had to call for the sil. But she will be sore tomorrow .
    Chris glad dh is ok. I think prostate is payback for all our menses ! FM had to go get his health check Monday and was supposed to call after, ….still waiting !
    Where is Lanzarote ?
    I must finish my salad so I can have ice cream ! I am about to fall asleep in it !
    Love
    Tonie

    • Tonie, you sound a bit more fatigued than usual. Doing too much or was it the swimming on Friday? I know that’s one of the hardest decisions we make; how much to rest and how much to push. As far as Ms Alice, I hope she’s okay and didn’t crack her tailbone or anything more serious in the hips and back. Hope your FM checks in soon and all is well with him. I know you live for those calls.
      I’m trying to adapt to the new pain patch I started on Sat. by having Jim help me put it on. I am supposed to change it once a week. I feel a bit buzzed because I’m one of those gals that could never tolerate heavy drugs or alcohol. One glass of wine with dinner, when I could drink alcohol, and I’m out for the night. The new med is helping the pain everywhere but in the back. I have been able to do more and must be careful not to overdo. Still on the lowest dose possible of Lyrica and it is helping the numbness in my feet and ankles. Just wanted to update everyone…sorry to talk about myself.
      Need to go to Costco…dread it but need some things and so much cheaper there. Hope you’re getting some rest and yes, I know you have only you to depend on and must push yourself. I know and understand. Love you much, Sue

      • My dear Sue
        I am SO happy you are getting relief for your pain. I understand about the back. It seems that whatever I am given nothing helps the back. The ice packs are helping the hip, but….when I swim that is why I have to stop at my goal, my back starts hurting. Just be good and don’t overdo. I know how hard it is to stop. That is what I did, too much last week.
        My FM called a little after I posted yesterday. He said he has been working long hours and epithet schools have been having meetings every few days. They have to watch the kids for signs of terrorist activities, so sad. So many in their schools and are being used to further the damages. At least the schools are doing everything they can to stay alert and keep everyone safe.
        We should be doing the same here. All this uproar caused by the media over police shootings….it is so sad. And the disruption of our country will be a distraction for other bad things to happen I am afraid.
        Anyway, Ms Alice is fine, wasn’t even sore really. She is snoring away haha ! It is Thursday so she gets a shower when she wakes up, much to her dismay. With the depends you have to or the smell is bad plus the risk for infections. I am becoming quite the nurses aide ya’all lol !
        Well, store after work, and then home. Have a bunch to do there just to get ready for the cool weather, so one thing at a time. Right ?
        Oh yeah, FM will next mont get all his retirement issues cleared up, then just waiting for Dec 3rd for him turning 65. Time is plodding along.
        Love ya
        Hope all is well with the family
        Tonie

  26. Tonie, Oh dear. Every time I see anything on the news about France I think of your FM. So tragic what has happened in France and will happen here if someone doesn’t stop it. I know you’re both so excited about his birthday and the retirement all working out. I’m anxious for both of you.
    I was thinking about Ms. Alice and I know hospitals are using big wet pads that can be used for bedbaths. THey would be great for her and her hygiene problems. Such a danger of decubitus ulcers developing from the urine. Maybe her daughter would buy some for her at a hospital supply store or online. I’m sure you are a wonderful nurses aide. You’re smart and compassionate and you can’t get much better than that. Wish you had a stronger back for the work, though.
    Yes, I am getting over some of the buzz I felt on the first day or two of the pain patches. I told Jim to tell me if I’m acting strangely in anyway, I mean more than usual. He, He. He probably wouldn’t be able to tell. I am a bit nervous about driving and probably won’t. Good thing Jim is retired now. On that front it is working out great. I can hardly wait for you and your FM to have these precious years together. Love ya much now must get something done around here. Love ya much, Sue

  27. Hi all
    Sue you sound so much alive now ,I,like it …
    Lanzarote is just south of Spain ,just off the north west coast of Africa ..its part of a series of islands
    Tonie
    You sound so busy still..mite not be long to wait now for you to be together
    Ice bags are the only thing that seems to work for me too
    Shorty tonite wacked from doing stuff.tiding up after the hedge taken down took all day
    Hope all ok
    Chris

    • Chris, wow, I know how messy hedges can be. We have two huge ones on each side of our steps outfront and when the guy even trims them we have leaves and stems for months. So now will the fence go up?
      I feel better, but a bit jittery. I’m such a terrible druggie. Glad I feel a bit better. It’s good to get relief and do a few things…not much but some. We’ve got to run to the store. Later, Love, Sue

  28. Sue
    The fence one was yesterday this was a hedge around the back..so we’ve had two lots to tidy up.
    So tomorrow we are doing nowt.no alarm on to have to get up for workman…bliss
    This hedge today was 20 ft wide by 15 ft high and about 6 ft deep and prickly.yesterdays was twice the length of fence of today but climbers with huge roots and ryzomes.got the posts up here and fence being made and hopefully up next week
    Be glad when we stop doing stuff….but good weather and nice to have it done for winter
    I can’t get on with drugs either sue
    Chris

    • Chris, you have convinced me we’re going to try to keep our hedge. Sounds like a great mess and a lot of work. I find even when the yard guy just prunes our hedge every year or two it is a mess for weeks afterward when the wind blows or it rains. The fencing sounds very nice and you’ll all safely buttoned up and secure.
      Oh yes, I’m a real light weight when it comes to any drugs that affect pain symptoms. I am a one glass of wine kind of gal when I could drink anything alcoholic. I also think it’s a matter starting out on very low doses for me. Today has been a terribly miserable day. Went out to eat last night, hard back chair and sat too long. Had good friends come in from out of town so no choice. It’s a sort of triple set of circumstances with it being methotrexate day yesterday, tomorrow being new patch day and doing too much. May have to increase the dosage but can’t get goofy. I can’t stand that feeling of being high. Don’t know why it’s such a desired affect for so many people in the world. Time for dinner…bacon baked, eggs and scalloped potatoes. Later, Love ya, Sue P.S. Sure do miss Jennie, don’t you all?

  29. Yea I miss Jen on here too..her funny quips .shell be back when all has been done..all a very worrying time.
    One other thing we had cut down Was bamboo…what a mess..but it was anyway if a wind blew..but have to keep,picking at it..have put root killer on it. Dried up,bamboo all over the garden in the beginning
    But it’ll be good when the fence is up and we can put a table there it’s only a small area just outside the back door
    I don’t drink now..used to enjoy it..but now I’m just ill next day on one.
    Hope you feel betterer soon..you wouldn’t have wanted to miss out with your friends i know
    Your dinner sounds lovely…nice meal to cook
    Well I don’t like goofy either…but you make it sound nice and friendly!
    Tonie
    Does that mean he could be over with you early next year ?
    Chris

    • Chris
      Yes, if all goes our way he could be here before March. He has things to resolve with money etc, but that is the goal.
      I had bamboo in Az. Got the big idea to put it in front. Of the house because so close to the road, just for privacy. Ha ! It was growing under the foundation ! I had to dig and dig and dig and poison and dig some more. And put some around the pool. Dug it up after I saw what it was doing out front.
      Thanks for the geography lesson. So many vacation spots you have that are not well known to us.
      Take care
      Tonie

    • Chris, oh yes, that damnable bamboo. My DD had it in the yard of her last house. It was impossible to kill without a great deal of trouble. Rock salt works pretty well, often better than root killer. Like Tonie said, every semblance of it has to be pulled out and that often means going deep. Nasty stuff. It’s wonderful, however you are being so creative with your yard and making room for the new fence and getting rid of all the old hedges. You haven’t mentioned lately how you are feeling. Is the hip better? Hard to imagine it is after all of the yardwork if you are doing any of that pulling and digging. Hope DH is still trying to get the magic combination on the B/P meds. Good we heard from our dear Jennie today, so must answer her next. Had to spend the day yesterday helping DD with her yard sale. It was cold, the ground was wet after rain the night before. She has had a terrible cold so Jim and I were there to lend a helping hand. GS helped and GD was off to Girl Scout camp for the day. Today was spent trying to and finally completing the writing of the new blog. Had trouble posting it because of the very recent update of Windows 10 in the next two days ago. Now I can’t figure out how to use Word and post it. Finally got it sent to Tonie but don’t know how I did it. I’ll have to spend time this week on trying to figure it out.
      New meds really pooped out when Methotrexate due on Friday and day before the new patch would go on. Better today but still jittery.
      Now we’re off to dinner with our SIL’s brother. Great guy and good friend. Later, much love, Sue

  30. HELLO.
    ITS BEEN AWHILE, JUST GOT BOGGED DOWN AND ITS SET TO GET WORSE…..DH IS BLOODY USELESS AT THE PAPERWORK, SO ITS ALL FALLING TO ME, BUYERS GOT DEPOSIT IN, GOT TO WAIT FOR IT TO BE OFFICIAL……FLIPPING FRENCH BUREAUCRACY IS DRIVING ME UP THE WALL.
    HOPING TO BOOK FERRY FOR DH AND FRIEND TO GO TO DEVON NEXT MONTH TO FIND A SINGLE STOREY RENTAL FOR SIX MONTHS, I GET TO STAY HERE WITH THE DOG….THEN LATE NOVEMBER I WILL BECOME A DEVONIAN DEVA….MWAH!
    HEALTH TAKEN A NOSE DIVE, ON FLIPPING STEROIDS AS PAIN GOT UNBEARABLE…..DH CLEARED ALL THE CELLAR AND MY BEAUTIFUL GARDEN LOOKING A SHADOW OF ITS FORMER SELF, TOOK AN HOUR OFF YESTERDAY, IT WAS WARM, SAT AND WATCHED MY BELOVED TREES GENTLY SWAYING, AND THINKING “I HOPE TO GOD WE GET A GARDEN WITH EVEN ONE TREE IN IT”
    ENGLISH PEOPLE BOUGHT OUR HOUSE, AS A HOLIDAY HOME…KIND OF SAD THAT, BUT NOT OUR BUSINESS, ITS TAKEN FIVE YEARS TO SELL, SO GOT TO SUCK IT UP….THEY SOLD THEIR APARTMENT IN SOUTHERN FRANCE, AND CAN’T GET THEIR STUFF BACK FROM THE REMOVAL COMPANY, AND MY DH AND I BEING THE SOFT IDIOTS WE ARE, HAVE LEFT THEM SO MUCH STUFF, THEY HAVE NO CROCKERY, COOKING STUFF THINGS FOR THE TABLE ETC…..THOUGHT ABOUT IT, AND SAID TO HUBBY, WE DON’T NEED TWO SETS OF EVERYTHING, SO WE ARE LEAVING IT ALL, PICTURES, CURTAINS, LOGS IN THE CELLAR, THE LIST IS ENDLESS, AS WELL AS HALF THE FURNITURE……IT FEELS GOOD TO GIVE. PITY CERTAIN OTHER FOLKS WERE NOT THE SAME……WE ARE BEING EMOTIONALLY BLACKMAILED BY A “FRIEND” WHO IS NOW MAKING DEMANDS ON THINGS HE THINK WE SHOULD GIVE HIM FROM OUR HOUSE. HE WAS KIND ENOUGH TO HELP US WITH THE REMOVAL ACROSS THE CHANNEL, AND PROPERTY HUNTING NEXT MONTH WITH MY DH……HE KEEPS MAKING THREATS LIKE “WELL I WON’T TAKE YOUR HUSBAND OVER TO DEVON THEN” ITS UNSETTLING, AND I WISH THERE WAS SOMEONE ELSE TO HELP US, BUT THERE ISN’ T, SO GOT TO TRY AND KEEP IT ZIPPED, TRY NOT TO CRY AND GET IT OVER WITH THEM. I DARE NOT TELL MY SON IN CORNWALL WHAT IS GOING ON, WHEN HE COMES TO DEVON TO HELP UNLOAD AT THE OTHER END, I WILL SAY NOTHING…….BUT PLENTY AFTERWARDS.
    WELL THIS IS THE ONLY TIME I HAVE HAD TO TAKE TIME OUT TO WRITE….IT COULD BE AWHILE BEFORE IT HAPPENS AGAIN, TONIE, SOON YOUR FM WILL BE FREE AND IT CAN ALL HAPPEN FOR YOU, CHRIS, YOU ARE HAPPY WHERE YOU ARE, I AM THANKFUL FOR THAT…KAY, I DON’T KNOW YOU, BUT GOT A FEELING I WILL BE SOON…..JUST ACROSS THE BORDER HUH? SUE, BEEN THINKING OF YOU, ALL OF YOU ARE STILL VERY MUCH UP THERE ON MY LIST OF THE FOLKS I CARE ABOUT AND PRAY FOR.
    HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND FOLKS, LOVE YOU BIG…..TILL NEXT TIME……JENNIE XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

    • Oh dear Jennie, been worried about you and it sounds like with due cause. I am so sorry you have pain overshadowing all you are going through. I sure do hope the steroids help the pain and hope they are also allowing you some time to sleep. I know that can be a terrible problem with that particularly med. Jen, it sounds like you have the world on your shoulders right now. I pray DH can find someone else to go with him to England if this so called friend is being such a jerk. Couldn’t you son meet him there? I know you will do what you must but it galls me to think of anyone taking advantage of you both. Life can be so evil at times…hope you can break ties with this guy soon. Circumstances sound so painful for you and I am concerned. Please know you have my concerns, my prayers and my love. Is there anyone in your study group who can help?
      There is a place for you in Devon waiting to be revealed. November will be here before you know it but with all you’re facing, whew! I hope you’re able to take the things that mean the most to you. I hope this time next year you will be able to look back on this time as necessary to place you where you want and need to be. Love you Jen and be assured you’re in my heart and in my prayers so many miles away, Sue

  31. Morning all
    Jennie, so good to see you on again my friend ! Been thinking of you and pray for your strength. Moving is such a chore in and of itself, but for different countries…. Sorry for the so called friend, pray he gets stingers in his bed to prick his conscience ! Some people are so greedy.
    Well, busy times here on the mountain as well. I did a lot yesterday and Friday. Did something I won’t do again alone. I got a load of gravel on the truck for a patch where I turn the truck that will get muddy this winter. Then of course, I had to unload all of it. Ha ! Never again. Really messed with my back. No swim on Friday cause I had to do that. Yesterday I finished cleaning out the garden, removing tomato stakes (sad no more tomatoes) and getting it ready for the plow. I have two hot pepper plants hanging full of peppers ! Why I always plant so many I don’t know, but I will let them dry out and just use the seeds.
    Sue so glad you are feeling better. I, on the other hand have a high tolerance for pain meds and alcohol. Or I did when I drank, would probably get drunk off one now.
    Now I am fighting the stink bug population trying to come in the house. Spraying all my doors and wi does is working . I am picking up dead bugs everyday in the twenty and thirties .
    Well, gotta go get ready for church. Got a message last night at 8:30 that I needed to teach today. We gotta talk about this .
    Love to all
    Tonie

  32. Well Tonie
    Hope your day got easier
    Bamboo…cut it all down,it was about 20 ft high….full of dead stuff at the bottom too. Watered it with root killer twice and 5 days later it’s sprouts lovely green leaves….so it’s got sprayed again.dig root bits up as we can and not on a windy day!..menace
    Jen
    Just take it as it comes..as soon as the pain goes it might all be easier
    Drs for DH tomorrow with his bp meds
    Done a lot today,just normal house work ..but fence should go up next few days it will give a little sitting out area for us from kitchen door
    Ok gonna close for nite
    Chris

  33. Beautiful blog, Sue. You’re such a wonderful writer! I burst out laughing when I read, “Girl, you don’t know what pain is”……no, but you’re about to. I’m so blessed to still have my mother. I mentioned before she is having knee joint replacement surgery at the end of the month. Last week she received the diagnosis of Ankylosing Spondylitis and I’m making an appointment to be tested for the HLA-B27 marker. I suspect it may be the reason for my sitter pain and not scoliosis as doctors have always thought. Jeez, just like the doctors you wrote about here. Life can be very unfair when it comes to health and genetics but my one girlfriend, who’s gone through 10 agonizing years with Lyme’s Disease and different treatments, and who’s entering med school soon, says we need to grow where we’re planted. I try to remember that and appreciate all my blessings. God bless all the folks currently affected by fires, hurricanes and the earthquake in South America. I send you my love, Sue.💞

    • Karen, wonderful surprise to find you on the blog. I’m sorry to hear about your Mom’s problems but it’s a good thing for you to be tested for HLA-B27. It does help to know if you are positive for that marker, or not. My sisters and I were all negative for that so our mysteries were all the more complicated. Your quest continues and I’m here to help in any way I can.
      I’m pleased you like the way I write about the lives we all lead. Not everyone understands and when we help each other…helps. Much love, Sue.

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